


My Wicked Princess

by CatiiaSofiia, MissChrisDaae



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Abusive Parents, Abusive Relationships, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Dark, Arranged Marriage, BDSM, Bad BDSM Etiquette, Dark Padmé Amidala, Dominant Padmé Amidala, Don't Try This At Home, Extremely Dubious Consent, F/M, Forced Marriage, Heavy Angst, Manipulative Sheev Palpatine, Submissive Anakin Skywalker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-08
Updated: 2020-07-01
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:27:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 67,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23548369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CatiiaSofiia/pseuds/CatiiaSofiia, https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissChrisDaae/pseuds/MissChrisDaae
Summary: A dynasty needs heirs. A Sith Dynasty is no exception. Unfortunately for him, Sheev Palpatine only has a daughter lacking the strength he craves for the Empire. The obvious solution is finding her a husband with enough strength to offset her deficiencies. The prospect of that husband being the Chosen One is too good to pass up.Padmé Palpatine, raised with the expectation that she would give birth to the next generation of Sith, does not relish the idea of doing so for Count Dooku. So, when the Count meets his end at the hands of a powerful young Jedi, she senses an opportunity to seize some control of her life. But in bringing him into her life and her bed, she exposes weaknesses within herself.When he struck down a Sith Lord, Anakin Skywalker had no idea he'd be expected to take that Sith Lord's place. And while romancing a princess seemed fun in theory, the reality is far more terrible and intoxicating than he imagined. And the longer it goes on, the more he feels him losing himself to the sway of the Dark Side and a wicked princess.It's a game of danger and desire, but surviving and winning are two different things. And no one leaves it without being changed irrevocably.
Relationships: Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 86
Kudos: 228





	1. If You Strike Me Down...

“He’s trying to kill me.”

“My lady, don’t exaggerate,” Yané scolded as she pulled the gold-handled brush through the curls of her mistress’ brown hair. “Your father wouldn’t dream of doing anything to harm his only child.”

“Yes, yes, I’m aware of how precious I am to him.” Padmé Palpatine, Crown Princess of the Galactic Empire opened her eyes to look across the faces of her handmaidens. “That’s why he keeps me confined to these rooms like a jewel in a case and only brings me out on special occasions. And I’m going to die of boredom waiting for that next special occasion.” None of them bothered to challenge her statement, and most simply continued to pamper her as they’d been doing, but Sabé exchanged a glance with Dormé. “I saw that.”

“Well, there’s a very simple solution, my lady, if you want one of us to serve in the position.”

“No, it’s not the same since Father said I can’t use the toys anymore,” Padmé huffed. “As if it somehow invalidates the sanctity of my womb for my nonexistent future husband.”

“Let’s not discuss that,” Saché said, flushing pink at the memory of how they’d been caught.

“A husband might come any day,” Yané added. “He probably just wants to make certain whoever it is will be worthy of you.”

“Strong enough in the Force to overcome my own deficiency, you mean,” the Princess grumbled.

There was a knock on the door before a stormtrooper entered and bowed his head. “Your Highness, my ladies, the Emperor asks if you are decent to receive him.”

Padmé looked around lazily at the sight of her handmaidens, all in corsets and shifts, and her wearing nothing but a white lace robe, then sighed. “Technically, I’m not, but it’s never a good idea to keep Daddy waiting, so tell him I’m coming.” Eirtaé reached over and helped her make sure the robe was fastened securely as she got to her feet.

“As you wish, your highness,” the guard bowed again. “Your father can receive you in the sitting room,” he informed them before he left the room.

“Sabé, Dormé, cloaks. You’ll come with me,” Padmé ordered, snapping her fingers as she headed for the door. “And quickly.” The family wing of the Imperial Palace did not have uninvited guests, so no strangers would see them in their current state, but there were still certain expectations of decorum to be upheld when visiting the Emperor.

“You might be getting your wish,” Sabé predicted as she pulled two dark purple cloaks from the wardrobe and passed one to Dormé as they followed behind Padmé, who was already several paces ahead of him.

“With Father, it’s impossible to say,” Padmé complained, the fringed edges of her robe shivering as she walked. The handmaidens didn’t contradict her as they reached the family sitting room, where the Emperor sat waiting for them.

“My dear, I thought you would never arrive. Have I interrupted something?” Sheev asked as he sipped his tea and waved to the side in front of him. “Sit,” he declared without waiting for her answer. Padmé obeyed, her two handmaidens taking their positions on either side of the door, waiting to be summoned.

“You interrupted nothing but the frivolities of women, Father,” Padmé replied diplomatically. “And you have my deepest apologies for the delay.”

“I hope you are obeying my rules, daughter?” He gave her a cold stare. “Your  _ toys  _ are to be kept in storage.”

“Of course,” Padmé said through gritted teeth.

“Good,” he stated flatly before taking a sip of his tea again. “Your husband would be displeased if he knew of your… particular tastes.”

“None of them ever actually penetrated me, I don’t see what the fuss was about,” Padmé retorted petulantly, crossing her arms. “I’m bored and I have needs. You understand this, you’ve maintained a harem for years, ever since Mother—”

“Women and men are different. You should know this. You should educate yourself on this. While your toys have been entertaining for you, it’s time that they are finished. We can’t allow loose ends. Dooku must think of you as pure, and what you indulge in is not,” Sheev said harshly.

“ _ Dooku? _ ” Padmé repeated incredulously. “Daddy, you can’t be serious, he’s old enough to be my grandfather! He’s older than  _ you! _ ”

“He still has the ability to procreate.  _ That _ is what matters to me. I want an heir,  _ dear daughter,  _ a worthy one, and Dooku has the capacity to give it to me.” Sheev explained coldly.

“I’m sorry I disappoint you so,” she said, automatically contrite at the reminder of her limited ability in the Force, “but are we  _ sure _ he can give it to you? A man that old might be just as likely to die of overexertion in the marriage bed, no matter how blushing his bride.”

“He is the strongest apprentice I have found, ever since the Jedi took the one I wanted,” he set the cup of his tea down with such anger, some of it spilled onto his hand. “You are welcome to change husbands, daughter, but only if the one you choose is stronger than Dooku. And he can prove that by bringing me his head.”

Sabé moved forward, taking a cloth to wipe away the spilled tea as Padmé sighed. “I understand, Father. I suppose I’m merely surprised that after making me wait so long, your choice is Dooku. He’s been in your service for a long time, I would have thought the delay meant you had other plans.” Not that she had  _ wanted _ Maul or Savage Opress. She wouldn’t have wanted them even if the Imperial laws forbid such miscegenation were lifted. All of her father’s long-standing ‘apprentices’ had repulsed her in very different ways. But he’d held firm on the facts. Her child would be heir not only to the Empire but to the power of the Sith. She needed a husband who would be strong in the Force.

“I have made my decision. Why I did it, it’s none of your concern,” he stood. “You will leave tomorrow, for an engagement tour throughout the Galaxy after your betrothal ceremony. You must get yourself known to the people. Loved by the fools. And, by the Force, no pets, Padmé. Do not place our House in the middle of a scandal just because you can’t hide your perverted tendencies.”

“I’m not  _ that _ stupid,” Padmé said defensively. “You know I’ll do whatever you need me to for the good of the Empire, the Sith, and our family. My  _ tendencies _ have sprung from your lack of interest in giving me anything to do. I can only sit and wait for so long before I need activities to pass the time.”

Sheev stared at her with an odd intensity, until air began to escape her and she felt like she was underwater and couldn’t breathe. “Not stupid. But useless. You would have thought you had learned your lesson not to talk back to me, but alas, you keep disappointing me, over and over again. Dooku is your last chance, or I will not be tolerant. I will make you the whore you want to be until someone accomplishes my goal. Are we understood, daughter?” She nodded, clutching at her throat desperately as her eyes filled with tears. “Good.” He released her, unbothered by her tears. “Prepare your things. You’ll leave at dawn.”

“Yes, Father,” she rasped out as Dormé helped her get to her feet.

* * *

“Hey, look at this.” Ahsoka passed over one of their datapads, the one that was hooked up to a pirated holonet frequency. “Dooku’s getting married to the Emperor’s daughter. I don’t know which of them I pity more.”

“Ahsoka, I hardly think our enemies’ marital affairs are a priority,” Obi-Wan scolded. “We should be focusing on our plans for leaving Alderaan as soon as possible.”

“Or maybe,” Anakin quipped, grabbing the datapad. “We take a shot at Dooku. The engagement tour will be in Alderaan in just a few days and we can use the festivities to confront him. Eliminate him once and for all and take revenge for the brothers and sisters he killed,” he stated, staring at the images. “I pity her,” he said, giving Ahsoka back her datapad. “No woman deserves to be stuck with a disgusting man like that.”

“Oh, and I bet you also think she’s pretty,” his Padawan laughed, turning the screen back to him, the picture of the Imperial Princess on full display. The young woman was wearing a dark red dress that clung tightly to her body, a collar of gold running across her shoulders and two long strands of red fabric trailing down her back. Her hair was scraped into a knot at the back of her head, held in place by a golden crown, and her face was impressively emotionless.

“Well, I’m not blind,” he shrugged, looking appreciatively at the picture of the Princess of the Empire. “I bet her father is forcing her into this marriage. She doesn’t even look  _ happy _ and can you imagine what kind of husband Dooku will turn out to be? Any woman deserves better.”

“Like the Chosen One?” Obi-Wan added dryly.

“Hey, I’ve been told I’m a good catch,” he flashed a grin at his Master.

“Of trouble, that’s what you are,” the older Jedi muttered under his breath.

“Emperor Dooku definitely doesn’t sound like fun to me, I’m all for Anakin’s murder-the-Count plan,” Ahsoka interjected.

“That’s two against one,” Anakin pointed out. “We win. We’re killing Dooku. No more running. We have the power to defeat the bastard, and that’s what we will do.”

“And get a thank-you kiss from the Princess for Anakin,” added Ahsoka teasingly.

“You never know! She might need to be rescued by a handsome knight,” he elbowed her side.

“Killing Count Dooku. Kidnapping the Princess. Any other suicidal plans you two might have been keeping from me?” Obi-Wan raised one eyebrow, unamused by their carefree antics, when they were in the middle of a war with the Empire, and losing it. You could count the remaining Jedi with your fingers, their troops were decreasing by the days and it was more the days they spent on the run, rather than on an actual base.

“Nah, just these two for now,” Ahsoka said brightly.

* * *

Dooku had agreed to marry his Master’s daughter for the good of the Sith. But barely a week into his engagement to the girl, he found himself contemplating her murder. Frequently.

Her lack of Force-sensitivity, Sidious had explained to him, made her no true heir to a galaxy that was meant to be ruled by the Sith. Thus, he had kept her sheltered and uneducated, preventing the possibility that she would become a rallying figure for an opposing political faction, or develop any ideas about disobeying him and seizing power for herself. Now that Dooku had to deal with her firsthand, he could not deny that his master had achieved those goals, but it had also resulted in her being vain, spoiled, and naïve to an insufferable degree. As soon as they returned to Imperial Center and this sordid business was finished, he would be seeing as little of his  _ wife _ as possible.

“I assume I won’t be seeing you again until this evening?” The princess asked, emerging from her side of the suite in a yellow dress and red jacket. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think this engagement tour was a thinly veiled excuse for Father to send you Jedi-hunting,” she sniffed, adjusting the golden band in her hair before fiddling with the red fingerless gloves on her hands. “Using me as bait.”

Perhaps she wasn’t as ignorant as he’d first thought. That was exactly the reason Sidious had given as an explanation to Dooku before their departure. “You should not concern yourself with such things, Princess.”

“So you  _ are _ doing that.” She sat on one of the couches, stretching out like a Loth-cat as she looked him over. “Father must have a very high opinion of you if he’d send you out in a way that puts his bloodline in danger.”

“Maybe he doesn’t care about his bloodline as much as one would think,” Dooku replied coolly.

“Do you want to test that theory by getting me killed?” she retorted haughtily.

“Are you in a rush to put your father’s feelings to the test? You might become disappointed,  _ sweetheart. _ ” 

“Don’t patronize me, Dooku. If you’re so eager to hunt Jedi, then go. I’ll wait around here like I always do.” She made a show of inspecting her nails, despite both of them knowing she would find no flaw in them.

“Don’t tire yourself too much,” he stated dryly. “We both know how your pretty life can get so  _ hectic _ , it’s a wonder how you have time to relax.” Dooku drawled out and not wanting to wait for a reply, left their suite.

If there were going to be any Jedi to be found on this absurd journey, Alderaan seemed a likely place. The Queen and her husband had practically admitted their sympathies for the Rebellion. Harboring Jedi would be in keeping with those sympathies, it was just a matter of him being able to properly track them.

If he concentrated, he could make out three distinct presences in the Force, faint but strong. Clearly trained. Just as Sidious had predicted. Dooku reached for the hilt of his own crimson lightsaber as he walked along the corridors. Would it be prudent to let them know he could sense them, or should he keep them unaware until he knew more of what to expect? He turned a corner, towards the palace gardens, and the presences grew stronger, almost blindingly so.

“Where’s your dear fiancée?” One voice provoked. “Did she hang you out to dry? Had a discussion? Did she realize you were as old as her father and kick you out?”

Dooku’s lightsaber snapped on, the hiss of the beam at odds with the gardens’ tranquility. “Let me see if I can’t place that arrogance. You’re not one of Yoda’s students, he would not stand for such,” he deduced aloud.

“Oh, well, look who’s talking,” a younger, more feminine voice snickered.

“I tried to give the boy an education,” the accent, distinctive of Coruscant, without a doubt belonged to Obi-Wan Kenobi. “Some things are not meant to be.” He knew who all three of his opponents were now. Besides Kenobi, there was Skywalker, and the Chosen One’s own Padawan, a Togruta girl whose name he had not considered to be worth learning.

“You have failed him further by lingering here, Obi-Wan,” Dooku scolded. “What would Qui-Gon say if he knew you let the Chosen One fall at my hands?”

“Probably something sarcastic about how you think too much of yourself and underestimate Obi-Wan’s teaching,” Anakin snorted.

“And the Chosen One’s skill,” the girl quipped with a chuckle.

“If you’re so confident of your abilities, boy, then come out and face me,” Dooku barked. “Or will you cower behind your master’s legs in the shadows?”

“Obi-Wan is too short for me to hide behind him,” Anakin snorted and his lightsaber snapped on, the blue light illuminating his young face. “It has been a long time coming, Count.”

“I will enjoy presenting you to the Emperor,” Dooku replied coldly, spinning his blade in preparation for the boy’s first attack. “And seeing you executed before the Galaxy.”

“Force, do they  _ ever _ update the evil speeches?” the girl’s voice complained. “It gets so boring! Remember when Maul made them?”

“I remember when Obi-Wan stabbed him!” Anakin used the Force to jump forward and launch his first attack on Dooku. The sabers clashed, red and blue seething and screeching as the two duelists pushed against each other. Grudgingly, Dooku admitted to himself that the boy’s strength  _ was _ impressive. But it was nothing that he couldn’t handle.

“Don’t make the Count break a hip, Skyguy,” the Padawan teased.

“I intend to make him break that and much more,” he growled as he continued to aggressively clash his saber with the Sith’s. “You’re going to regret the day you turned to the Sith.”

“Will I?” Dooku scoffed, pushing him back with the Force and attacking quickly enough that he could slash his saber up the side of the young man’s face.

“Anakin!” Obi-Wan’s voice called out as the older Jedi emerged from his own hiding place, saber already ignited. The Padawan stepped out too, wielding two green blades.

Anakin hissed as the skin over his eye burned and stung. Rage filled him, as he vibrated with the need to attack his opponent. “This is over, Dooku,” he snarled and initiated a rapid attack of several clashes against the Sith’s lightsaber. Half-blind, but driven by fury, it made Anakin a deadly opponent. No doubt, he used the Force to guide him, to influence his next move. 

The other two Jedi didn’t even get the chance to intervene in the duel. Anakin was moving so quickly that they both feared he might accidentally strike them in the process. Dooku’s strength was clearly faltering as it was. Anakin was younger and more powerful and he always became dangerous whenever his anger fueled him. It was one of his biggest flaws.

Dooku grunted as he missed a step. Anakin didn’t wait and delivered a vicious blow, cutting the hands from the Sith, who fell with a howl of pain to his knees. Breathless, hair sticking to his forehead and neck with the thin layer of sweat covering his skin, Anakin stood victoriously tall. “Any final words, Sith?”

“Strike me down and you condemn yourself to a worse fate.”

“My fate is none of your concern,” Anakin hissed before beheading the Count, his head rolling to Obi-Wan and Ahsoka’s feet. His shoulders fell forward as the skin on his face stung and his breathing was irregular.

“Sith kriffing hell,” Ahsoka whispered in shock. “You actually did it.”

“No one move!” A hail of blaster fire ran over their heads and Obi-Wan and Ahsoka whirled to see a wall of clones surrounding them on all sides. “Drop your weapons!” Anakin glared at all of them, making Dooku’s saber fly to his other hand. He’d killed one Sith, he could kill a small battalion of mindless clones.

“Master Kenobi, do you think we can take them?” Ahsoka asked in a small voice, hands gripping the hilt of her lightsabers.

“No,” Obi-Wan whispered hollowly. “We’ll be killed before we can escape.”

“Obi-Wan,” Anakin hissed. “We can do this! We’ve dealt with worse.”

“You can barely see!”

“I said drop your weapons!” the lead trooper ordered. “Stand down!”

“Do what he says,” Obi-Wan told Ahsoka and Anakin. “We think of something later. For now, let’s keep ourselves alive.”

Gritting his teeth but acknowledging his Master was right, Anakin threw Dooku’s saber far away from his, while turning his own off and setting it down on the ground with care. He would get it back soon. “Ahsoka, do it,” he whispered. “Let’s follow Obi-Wan’s order.” 

Reluctantly, his Padawan dropped her lightsabers to the ground as Obi-Wan laid his down more cautiously. The troopers closed in on them, some gathering up the sabers while others forced their hands into binders.

“Take them to a holding cell. We’ll await further orders from there.”

* * *

Padmé sat in front of Bail and Breha Organa, trying not to laugh. “ _ Three _ Jedi? My goodness, what an unfortunate turn of events.” She hadn’t packed anything that could serve as mourning garments for her now-deceased betrothed, but then again, she wasn’t exactly mourning Dooku’s loss. So, she’d opted for a red and black spectra-dyed strapless dress with a matching capelet to cover her shoulders once she’d heard the news, to give some illusion of tastefulness.

“Your Highness,” Queen Breha shifted nervously. “I promise you, we didn’t know.”

“I don’t care.” Padmé reached for the platter of cakes on the table and popped one into her mouth. “I don’t care whether or not you knew, or if you were helping them, or if you are still helping the Rebellion. And I think you know that my father is already fully aware of what the two of you are up to, and he doesn’t care either. So let’s skip the part where you lie to me and say everything you’re supposed to and get to the point. You’ve been to Imperial Center. You have some idea of what my life is like and what is expected of me. You know those expectations involve a man who’s now dead. And so, obviously,” she tilted her head expectantly. “I’m curious about the three people responsible for that death. Tell me about them.”

"We don't know the Jedi," Bail said diplomatically. "They are on our planet, but it does not mean that we have any sort of involvement with them."

“Viceroy, I would remind you that they were in your palace,” Padmé curled a loose strand of her hair around her finger. “Is your security so lax that you can let enemies of the Empire slip through the cracks so easily?”

"You must know of the Jedi powers, your highness," Breha spoke, lacing her fingers with her husband's in a sign of love and support. "They go beyond our control.”

“Oh, so you’re weak-minded. Maybe Alderaan should be under new management, then. Someone who won’t be vulnerable to their tricks."

Bail exchanged a worried glance with his wife. While he supported the Rebellion and was sympathetic with the Jedi's mission, Obi-Wan was a close friend of his, he couldn't deny that they got themselves into a tricky situation. Dooku's death and their imprisonment has left them with little choice and they owed peace to the people of Alderaan. Not war. Breha understood this as well and while she looked remorseful at the fact that they had to give up their friends, their hope, she knew their people had to come first this time. 

"Obi-Wan Kenobi. Anakin Skywalker. Ahsoka Tano," he said hollowly. "They are the Jedi you currently have in your custody."

“Now we’re getting somewhere.” Padmé clapped her hands in delight as if she’d just been told a juicy piece of gossip. “Do tell me more, I’m simply dying to know.”

"They are Jedi, there isn't much to tell," Breha responded, even if a little more bluntly than she intended. "Obi-Wan is, or was, part of the Jedi Council. Anakin is still a Jedi Knight and Ahsoka is a young Padawan. Is that what you wanted to know?" Bail squeezed her fingers. He understood his wife's irritation, to be under the Princess' thumb and with their fate on the line was a dreadful place to find himself, and these were their friends. Whatever else they knew, they wouldn't tell. 

The princess’s smile fell and she sniffed a little. “I was hoping for more insight into their personalities. Surely they have them? Or are you being difficult on purpose? Do I need to make a call to my father with bad news? I  _ really _ don’t want to do that.”

"Jedi don't really have personalities, they have morals and compassion." Bail said calmly. "One of the reasons your father had their temple burned to the ground, alongside their children. Or that particular piece of information has slipped in history?"

“Father has compassion.” Padmé stood, glaring down at both of them. “He saw a galaxy consuming itself, thanks in part to the negligence and arrogance of the Jedi, and he made the choice to save everyone from themselves. A choice, I will remind you, that was met with thunderous applause. Or has that slipped your memories?”

"Mine are intact. There was no applause from me. Not while children were burning alive, women and men were being killed in cold blood and targeted for the rest of their lives." Bail kept his composure but there was a tension to his voice.

“The Jedi took children from their parents. They raised them without love, without emotion. They schemed and lied and contrived for power, do you really want to lay down your lives for the benefit of such people?”

"I believe your father would like you to return home, Princess," Breha spoke a bit more harshly before her husband could reply and end in prison alongside their friends. "You should decide what to do with the Jedi and return home, where you belong."  _ With the ones of your kind.  _

“Oh, I already know exactly what I plan to do with them.” Padmé’s lip curled in disgust. “But consider this your one and only warning. Alderaan will be much more closely watched from now on, and if this kind of  _ indiscretion _ happens again, my father won’t be so lenient.”


	2. To the Victor, Go the Spoils

“We’ve been here way too long,” Ahsoka remarked as she tugged again at the Force-suppressant binders on her wrists. “What are they waiting for?”

Anakin snorted. "I don't know. How they're going to kill us, maybe."

Obi-Wan looked at them both with a calm, but heavy look. "Anakin, Ahsoka, whatever happens, I want you both to let me speak. Especially you, Anakin, you can't be the hero. Not now. You have a mission."

"If you think I'm letting you take the fall for what I did, Obi-Wan, you are sorely mistaken," Anakin scowled. "You have a mission as well. We all do."

“And you’re the Chosen One,” Obi-Wan reminded him, his voice barely audible to prevent anyone else from overhearing them. “It’s your destiny to end this once and for all. I’m more expendable than you are. You need to survive.”

"No one here is expandable," Ahsoka proclaimed. "We'll stick together. Sith hell, if push comes to shove, I did it. You are more valuable. Both of you."

"Snips, don't even speak like that." Anakin hissed. "No one is dying. Okay? No one. This is not over."

“They’re in here, your highness,” a clone’s voice came from down the hall, and the sound of light steps followed the heavy footfalls of Imperial troopers.

“And they’re secured?” None of them could see the owner of the voice, but it had a sweet, almost childlike quality to it. “They can’t use the Force?”

“No, Princess, they can’t.”

“Excellent. Open the cell and let me in.”

The three scrambled to their feet as much as they could, and a shiver went down Anakin’s spine as he saw the woman enter. He’d thought her beautiful and she was. She was stunning and had an angelic face with petite features. Overall, she looked like a perfect little doll. But her eyes and her aura, those had a sharpness and darkness that caused him to stand a little straighter. She wasn't angelic. She might be the contrary.

“What an unusual trio the three of you make,” the Imperial Princess mused, tapping an immaculately painted red fingernail against her chin as she turned from side to side, inspecting the three of them. Her brown eyes lingered on Ahsoka. “You can sit, dear, I’m not going to have much use for you.”

Ahsoka looked over worriedly at Anakin. He nodded once and she sat down warily. 

"Your highness," Obi-Wan bowed his head, ever the diplomat and negotiator. "What can we do for you this evening?" 

“Judging by the accent,” she tilted her head, “and the beard, I would guess that you’re Kenobi. Yes? Which would make you,” she paused and looked at Anakin, “Skywalker. My goodness.” A pale pink tongue ran across her dark red lips as her dark gaze traveled between them, “you two are quite the sight.”

Anakin frowned, not enjoying the hungry look she was currently giving him and Obi-Wan, and he had half a mind to comment when he heard his Master's voice.  _ Quiet. You will only upset her. Let me take care of the negotiations.  _

"We are glad we please you. Have you come to a decision about our fate?" Obi-Wan asked, his voice carefully diplomatic. "Have you considered a fair trial for us?"

“Do you really think that’s such a good idea?” she clucked her tongue. “Any trial there could possibly be for the three of you would end up exposing countless people who helped you hide from the Empire for all these years. And there’s no denying that someone with a lightsaber lopped off my fiancé’s hands and head. You’ll be found guilty, fair or not. I’m curious, which one of you was it?”

"I did it," Anakin blurted out. Obi-Wan whirled around to give him an angry look. "I'm sorry, Master, I'm not going to let you get all the glory for this." The Rebellion needed Obi-Wan Kenobi. Not the Chosen One. 

"Skyguy…" Ahsoka’s eyes widened. 

“Hmmm.” The princess turned her gaze back on him, reaching up to cup his face with both hands as she stared straight into his eyes. “I believe you are telling me the truth.”

He wanted to pull away from her but instead, he just huffed. "Why would I lie?" 

“Protecting your friend. Your master,” she pointed out, maintaining her grip. “Clearly, he would do the same for you. It’s sweet. But glory isn’t the word I’d use for what you’re going to get, Anakin Skywalker.”

“I will forever gloat of the way Dooku died. He deserved it. For me, it’s glory,” he said bluntly and taking a step back, away from her grasp. He didn’t have the Force, but he still towered over her in both height and strength. “Now, what are you going to do about it?” He challenged and could Obi-Wan shake his head over the corner of his eye.

“I’m going to make you an offer,” she answered. “I can’t let all three of you go. But if Dooku’s killer were to take his place, I  _ could _ forget I ever met the other two and send them on their way.”

“Take his place?” Obi-Wan echoed in surprise.

“As your  _ fiancée _ ?” Ahsoka guessed, her jaw dropping in shock.

“And as your father’s apprentice,” Obi-Wan realized in a terrified whisper to himself. “I’m sorry to say,” he cleared his throat, making his voice heard. “Anakin is just an idiot. He’s a child. He’s trying to be immortalized by some stupid sacrifice for me. I killed Dooku. We faced each other several times, I bested him when he injured Anakin. You can see his eye is still healing. Does a man who goes half-blind have the capacity to kill a Sith?”

“So then _you’ll_ do it?” the Princess scoffed. “Accept the terms of my offer?”

“I will.” Obi-Wan accepted.

“Shut up, Obi-Wan, she’s not that beautiful that we have to fight for her and we both know you prefer blondes,” Anakin scowled, stepping forward again. “I did it. I accept your terms, whatever they are, as long as you assure me that nothing,  _ nothing _ happens to either of them. Not now. Not ever.”

“Oh, it’s so tempting to keep the both of you and have done with it,” she pouted prettily. “I can just imagine the fun we’d have together. But Father wouldn’t approve.”

Ahsoka made a disgusted face that mirrored her Master’s.

“I already accepted. What else do you need?” Anakin growled.

“You _both_ accepted, I’m thinking about what _I_ want.”

“He didn’t kill your husband-to-be,” Anakin forced.

“Anakin, back off,” Obi-Wan ordered.

“You don’t have enough stamina for Coruscant. Not anymore,” his Padawan retorted.

“Oh, stop it, both of you.” Padmé snapped her fingers. “Anakin, let me be clear. They are right. You  _ will _ be my father’s Apprentice. But more than that, you will be my betrothed. My husband.  _ Mine.  _ In every sense of the word.”

“Is there another option?” Ahsoka asked quietly. “Where you let us all go? Or find a use for me? Anything else?”

“Ahsoka, be quiet,” Anakin ordered harshly. He kept his gaze on the Princess, he shivered as he felt the implication of her words. The weight they carried. She made the idea that he would belong to her sound worse than the fact that he would become a Sith’s apprentice. “What? You’re going to keep me on a leash or something?”

“It’s a small price to pay for the safety of your friends and the continued freedom of Alderaan, don’t you think?” she asked sweetly. “We’ll both get what we want, in a way. But I’ll give you a few hours to think about it. And expect an answer when I return.”

“You’ll have the same one as you do now,” Anakin replied coolly.

She grabbed the edge of his tunic and pulled him down, crushing her lips against his in a violent kiss. Without missing a beat, she let him go and repeated the same gesture with Obi-Wan, who looked horrified as she pulled away. “Just something to consider,” she trilled brightly, turning on her heel and sweeping out of the cell.

“Well, she’s definitely a new level of insanity,” Ahsoka declared, somewhat traumatized by the scene in front of her.

“Hope Satine doesn’t take this one too personally,” Anakin pointed out, pursing his lips together and closing his eyes to regain his composure. “I don’t know if you noticed, but she tends to become possessive.”

“Satine is the least of my concerns at this moment,” Obi-Wan said, shaking his head. “You  _ can’t _ do this, Anakin. I won’t allow it. You’re too valuable to fall into the Empire’s hands, to the  _ Dark Side _ !”

“And you are an insufferable prick who won’t bend to the Dark Side  _ or  _ to the Princess and then you’ll get killed because of it. You won’t last a month. I was a slave once. I can do it again,” Anakin argued. “This way I know it’s for the greater good. You, Obi-Wan, are the person the Rebellion needs. Not me.”

“Skyguy, I don’t trust her not to kill you,” Ahsoka blurted. “You have no idea what she could do to you.”

“As long as I give her what she want, she’ll play nice. I’ve dealt with slavers before, Snips, I know how their mind works,” he explained. “I’ll resist the Dark Side as long as I can. I promise I will hold on to your teachings, Master,” he turned to Obi-Wan. “See it as an incentive to the Rebellion. The sooner you defeat the Empire, the sooner I can return home.” 

Obi-Wan closed his eyes and leaned back against the wall. “You’ll keep your mind shielded? And practice the ways of the Light whenever possible?”

“You have my word,” Anakin vowed. “Whenever possible. Whenever I have a moment to myself, I’ll meditate. I’ll think of your teachings. I’ll be a better student far away from you than I ever was at the Temple.”

“Then I can’t stop you. Clearly. But I will not stop worrying for you, Anakin.”

“Did she turn you both crazy when she kissed you?” Ahsoka asked in disbelief. “You’re handling this way too calmly!”

“There is no other option, Ahsoka, and I’m not allowing her to hurt you,” Anakin sighed. “Either of you. I’ll be fine. I’ll take care of things on my end and who knows? I might end the Empire myself. Let him teach me. It might be his downfall. I will snap and kill both of them just like I did to Dooku and we’ll be free.”

“Do not let your abilities make you overconfident,” Obi-Wan warned. “Remember what Master Yoda said.”

“Worry about keeping yourself and Ahsoka safe. That’s all I need to know to be alright.”

“Promise me you’ll stay alive.”

“You’re not getting rid of me that easily. I’ll still annoy you for a long time,” Anakin gave him a small smile.

“Force help me, but I hope you’re right.”

* * *

It was impossible to say how much time actually passed between the Princess’ departure and her return, but in that time, she’d apparently decided it was necessary to change out of the black and red dress she’d been wearing and into one that looked like liquid chromium was pouring down her body. The lights of the cell barricade and the binders holding them reflected off the fabric, making her seem not entirely human. “Well?” she asked, looking at each of them in turn and saving Anakin for last. “Have you decided?” She took a step closer to him. “Are you mine?”

He hadn’t liked being a slave the first time. He remembered dreaming of a day where he would be free. As his mother would. But he needed to keep his focus. Ahsoka and Obi-Wan’s lives were at stake and he would never risk them. He stood a little straighter. “Yes,” he declared. “But only when they have left Alderaan. Not to be tracked or followed. They are to be given their weapons back.”

“Agreed,” she nodded serenely. “I’ll have them declared dead, for good measure.” 

“I get to say goodbye, too. Privately.”

“If you like, pet. Anything else?”

He tensed and Ahsoka looked like he wanted to strike her. “I want my weapon back.”

“Why?” The Princess looked surprised more than anything else. “You’ll be getting a new one soon enough.”

“I won’t hold on to it. I want it back nonetheless. It is mine.”

“Fine. Have it. I don’t care,” she shrugged carelessly, snapping her fingers. The cell door opened and troopers moved in, carrying the four lightsabers. “You two, once my fiancé is finished with them, take the bearded one and the girl to the hangar. Get them on a ship and get them out of here. You,” she paused and put a hand on one in blue-painted armor, “will escort my knight to me at that time. Is that understood?”

“Yes, Princess,” they said in unison. The Princess smirked and pulled Anakin in for another kiss, this time biting his lip hard enough to draw blood and forcing her tongue into his mouth.

“You’re a romantic,” he said dryly, licking the blood off of his lips as she pulled away. 

“Among other things.” Her nails traced his cheek. “But you’ll see soon enough. Make your farewells quickly. I want to get off this silly little planet and go home.” She left as quickly as she’d come, but her presence lingered. The clones passed back the lightsabers and removed the binders. Then they stepped out of the cell, giving the three Jedi a modicum of privacy.

"I don’t like this, Anakin, I really don’t." Obi-Wan was clearly upset and if the situations were reversed, Anakin knows he would be too. "You're the Chosen One. You're the only hope of this Galaxy."

"No," Anakin replied, strangely calm. "You are, Master. We both know you are more skilled in battle and strategy than I could ever be. The Rebellion looks to you for guidance and I wouldn't dare to take it away from them, they need you. Desperately so." Obi-Wan gave him a heavy and concerned look. The only time he’d caught sight of his Master's bright eyes was when he was a little kid, before Qui-Gon had died. Knowing it was probably the last time he saw them, he pulled his Master for a simple embrace and was surprised when he hugged him back tightly.

"Take good care of yourself, Anakin."

"If something... Something happens to me... The Dark Side, we both know I'm much more vulnerable... You know what you have to do." His voice didn't tremble. He wasn't afraid. If he became a Sith, he knew only Obi-Wan could defeat him. "Don't miss." His Master tensed and Anakin pulled away with a small smile. "You're the only one I trust to do it."

"Master," Ahsoka wasn't shy about her emotions but seeing her tears made him weak. He loved the Togruta as a little sister, one he wanted to protect at all costs. "There has to be another way. She can't do this."

"Snips, everything is going to turn out okay. Your responsibility now is to make sure the Rebellion succeeds. Help Obi-Wan, we know how dense he can be." She snorted and hastily cleaned her tears. "I'm proud of you. I'm happy I got to be your Master, little one."

"We'll come back for you," Ahsoka vowed and flew into his arms, hugging him tightly. "We'll save you."

"I would rather you stay safe." He kissed her forehead. "Safe and smart. Remember what I taught you. Listen to Obi-Wan."

Ahsoka reached up and removed the silka beads that made up her Padawan braid, placing them in his hand and wrapping his fist around it. "For good luck."

His heart tightened and he smiled, forcing his tears away. "I'm going to miss you, Snips."

"Me too, Skyguy."

Anakin looked at his lightsaber and sighed, knowing he would miss the weight of the weapon, how it fit his grip and how it had become an extension of his arm. He passed it to Obi-Wan’s hand.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm not going to let Sidious get his hands on this. Or destroy it. Taint it. No. It's meant for other things. Good things."

Obi-Wan gripped the weapon tightly. "I'll give this back to you. Soon."

"If it doesn't come to that, give it to your next Padawan."

"Not going to happen." Obi-Wan scoffed.

"As long as you give it to someone who deserves it."

“May the Force be with you, Anakin Skywalker.”

“May the Force be with you, Obi-Wan. Ahsoka. Stay safe.”

“Are you ready to go?” one of the troopers asked from outside.

“They are,” Anakin announced and stepped back, feeling a weight on his heart now that he was saying goodbye. It felt so final. It probably was. If he didn’t bend to the Dark Side, he would be killed, if he turned, he wouldn’t want to live for long and he would patiently wait for Obi-Wan to keep his promise.  _ They’re safe. They’ll be alright. They’ll save the Galaxy.  _

Obi-Wan followed the clones quickly, but Ahsoka lingered, looking back at Anakin mournfully. He muttered ‘ _ go _ ’ to her and nodded with a forced smile.  _ That  _ was something he did right. Agreeing to train her. “Come on.” One of the troopers grabbed her by the arm and pulled her away, leaving Anakin with the blue-armored one.

“I have to take you to the Princess now, sir.”

“I want to watch them leave,” he said, his voice choked as he couldn’t contain his emotions anymore. “When the ship takes off, you can take me back.”

“I don’t know how the Princess will take that, sir.”

“She’ll be fine,” he said through gritted teeth. “Five more minutes won’t kill her and if they do,  _ good _ .” He didn’t think he’d hurt this bad again since he lost his mother, and yet this woman had done it. He wiped his tears away with the back of his hand.

“Alright, sir. We’d better follow them, then.” The clone nodded. “And quickly. The princess isn’t very patient. And you don’t want to see her in a bad mood.”

Anakin nodded and followed them outside, where a ship waited. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to swallow down his fear, his sadness, his anger. From the viewport, he could see Ahsoka waving to him.  _ Bye, Snips. _

“It’s hard to lose family,” the clone observed softly.

Anakin gave an empty laugh. “You think?” He had to control himself. He wouldn’t let the Imperial Princess see his emotions, his tears. He groaned, pressing the back of his hand against his eyes. This needed to stop. “You should take me back to her.”

“We’re going in there.” The trooper used his blaster to indicate a tri-winged shuttle. “It’ll take us up to the star destroyer, so we can head back to Imperial Center.”

“Fun,” he stated dryly and paused. “What’s your name?”

“My brothers call me Rex, sir.” He pulled off his helmet so that Anakin could see the close-shaven blond hair and tanned face. “CT-7567, Captain of the 501st Legion.”

“Nice to make your acquaintance, Rex,” Anakin nodded. “Thankless job you have here.”

“I’ll take guarding the Princess over combat, sir, I’ve lost a lot more brothers to the latter.”

“I signed myself up for hell, haven’t I?” He asked dryly.

Rex hesitated. “How much do you know about the Princess and her hobbies, sir?”

“Nothing. I don’t know her. I just know I already despise her.” He made a face.

“Better I don’t tell you then. Don’t want to misrepresent anything.”

His shoulders dropped and he wondered how long he would actually be able to play this game until he was driven mad and did something crazy to himself or others.

In the main cabin of the ship, the princess sat between two women who looked eerily like her, letting them brush out her lustrous brown curls. “Anakin. Did you do everything you wanted to?” she asked sweetly.

_ Well, I didn’t kill you, so no.  _ “Yes.”

“Wonderful. Sabé, Dormé, what do you think of him?” She looked at the two women with a smile. “Besides the obvious.”

“He’s a much more suitable male to be your consort. An upgrade in every sense from Count Dooku,” Dormé replied.

“He needs a little grooming, though,” Sabé tilted her head.

“Easily remedied,” the princess giggled.

“Oh, we should order his wardrobe in order to match yours,” Dormé suggested. “The HoloNet would  _ love  _ it.”

“That might be a bit much.” The Princess affixed her gaze on Rex. “Inform the other troopers that we’re ready for departure. And make sure the Destroyer is prepared for our arrival.”

The clone trooper saluted her and giving a sympathetic look at the cuffed Jedi, abandoned the cabin in favor of his new orders.

“Black,” Sabé decided. “It’s his color. He will look good in black. It will bring out his eyes and hair color. And he’s fair-skinned. It will be stunning on him.”

Anakin glanced around the women, already tired of their futile conversation. This is what his life was resumed? Being ogled by women speaking about clothes and fabrics and whatnot? His unwanted fiancée approached him, reaching over to deactivate the binders and remove them from his wrists. “We’ll save these for another time,” she promised with a wicked smile, passing them over to one of the handmaidens.

“I have a cabin, I’m sure?” He questioned dryly.

“You’ll occupy Dooku’s chambers in the Star Destroyer, yes,” she confirmed. “Do whatever you like with it once we’ve docked.” The ship’s engines sharted up, and she sank back into her seat. “If you’re going to destroy them, do let me know. I want to watch.”

He didn’t reply or was going to give her the pleasure of watching him lose his cool.

“Are you hungry, pet? Thirsty?”

“Tired. Can I retire?” He gritted his teeth.

“Once we reach the Star Destroyer. It’s a short trip,” she promised. “And you’re right to want to rest. You’ll need your strength when you meet my father.”

“I can’t wait,” he drawled out sarcastically.

“One other thing. Work on your lying. He’s not as generous as I am.”

He rolled his eyes focusing on something else around him since he couldn’t look at her anymore.

* * *

Their return to Imperial Center was not publicized. They arrived in the middle of the night, in a private hangar of the Imperial Palace, to the Emperor waiting for them. Padmé practically flew to her father’s side, embracing him warmly. “I brought a surprise,” she trilled proudly. “I think you’ll like it, Daddy.” Anakin made a face. He remembered Sheev Palpatine. He met him briefly when he was nine. Qui-Gon had arrived in Coruscant with the Chosen One, before the battle with Maul and his death. He wondered, though, if the man remembered him at all. “This is Anakin Skywalker,” Padmé said, leaning against her father’s shoulder with a grin. “Isn’t he splendid?”

“Oh, my dear, you have brought me quite a gift,” Sheev’s face broke into a wide smile. 

_ Kriff. He remembers me.  _ Anakin swallowed the lump on his throat.

“Anakin, my boy, it has been too long.” He took a couple of steps forward, untangling himself from his daughter’s hold, favoring the closeness with the younger man. “You were just a child when we first met. Look at you now!” He gripped Anakin’s shoulders. “I always knew our paths would cross again.” The Dark Side rolled off the old man in waves.

“It’s a pleasure to see you again,” Anakin said, shifting uncomfortably, “your majesty.”

“He killed Dooku,” Padmé added, smiling brightly. “Single-handedly.”

“I would expect nothing less from the famed  _ Chosen One.”  _ The Emperor’s eyes gleamed. “I always knew you had potential that would be wasted with the Jedi.”

“Your daughter found me and couldn’t let me out of her grasp. She’s good at fetching things, apparently,” he couldn’t help the jab. “Only this time, it wasn’t a dress.”

“I have an eye for quality,” she replied silkily. “Father, I realize there will be some trouble with the HoloNet, explaining Dooku’s demise, but—”

“Oh, I will deal with the HoloNet,” Sheev dismissed her concerns. “You did very well on this trip, Padmé, very well indeed,” he patted Anakin’s shoulder. “Besides a marvelous son-in-law, Anakin will be my most talented apprentice. Won’t you, son?”

His stomach twisted in knots, Anakin glanced from father to daughter. They were both crazy. Insane. They were going to turn him inside out. Eat him and spit him out. He always thought he would end up in hell for a few sins here and there, he wasn’t a perfect Padawan, far from it. He didn’t realize he would walk straight into it. “I will try my best.”

“Good, good, we’ll make a Sith of you in no time.” The Emperor practically cackled. “Go on, my dear, take him inside, settle in. Tomorrow, we will begin the preparations for your wedding. And your training, my young Apprentice.”

Anakin’s heart was thundering inside his chest. He already felt suffocated. “Yes,” he nodded, bowing his head slightly.

“Yes,  _ what _ ?” Palpatine barked so sharply that his daughter seemed startled.

“Master.” He said through gritted teeth. “It won’t happen again.”

“Good, good.”

“Father, he’s tired, you’re overwhelming him,” Padmé said nervously, stepping towards Anakin and wrapping one of his arms around her waist.

“I don’t need you to protect me,” Anakin said as he tried to pull away from her touch without being too obvious. “Your father is right. He is my Master. It slipped my mind. Rookie mistake,” he finally got her untangled from him. 

“Forgive my daughter, Anakin, I fear I’ve coddled her to the point of making her soft.” 

“My focus will be my training,” he replied coolly. “Master.”

_ Keep your head low. Keep him happy. Survive.  _ It was a mantra he needed to start repeating to himself. “Excellent.” The Emperor put a hand on each of their shoulders. “I think I can expect great things from both of you in time. Very great things.” The hand that had been on Padmé’s shoulder slipped down to rest at the blue velvet corset covering her stomach. Padmé squeezed her eyes shut and nodded.

“We won’t disappoint you, Father,” she whispered.

_ Yeah… that will never happen.  _ “Nothing is more important than family,” Anakin replied with a fake smile.


	3. Sealed and Damned with a Kiss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for the chapter: some sex-negative language and touching without proper consent and less than kosher bondage practices, but nothing too explicit or graphic.

“It’s Anakin, isn’t it?”

Turning around, he eyed the new woman warily. A month had gone by and he had been wary of all the people he met, unable to trust them completely. He has been able to keep his head low and study the Dark Side. Sheev justified that the more intensive training would be saved for _after_ the honeymoon and Anakin dreaded them. His _Master_ had shown his ugly side more than once and Padmé was like his shadow, even with the wedding being planned. She was impossible to escape and impossible to stand. Their faces were everywhere. HoloNews was crazy with the gossip.

“Who are you?” He asked harshly.

“Sola Naberrie,” the older brunette woman answered, cautiously moving inside the room. “You’re marrying my sister. Well, half-sister, as her father is always quick to point out.”

Anakin took one step back. “You’re _her_ sister? You almost look normal.”

“Yes, Padmé’s beauty is quite infamous,” Sola sighed, smoothing the dark purple skirts of her high waisted dress. “But that was part of why I wanted to talk to you before the madness of today truly gets underway.”

“That was not the normal I was talking about,” he muttered. 

“I’m not naïve, Anakin. I know what the Emperor has made of my sister.”

“Crazy? Lunatic?” He suggested, looking around the opulence of the room.

“Misguided.”

“I would love to hear your definition of misguided,” he rolled his eyes, sitting on the small steps where, in a couple of hours, he would be saying his vows and throwing the rest of his life and sanity away.

“She was a sweet child before our mother passed. I’m hoping you can help her remember that part of herself. I’ve tried to do it myself, but the Emperor doesn’t like for me to be around her very much.”

Anakin hesitated before laughing, startling Sola. “Are you…” he shook his head, still laughing. “Are you serious? Are you _actually_ asking me to help someone who basically turned me into her slave and her father’s pet? Or the other way around, I don’t know, it’s messed up. They are messed up and deserve each other. The only person I am helping is me and that is already a strenuous task with what I have to deal with.”

“Please.” Sola’s face was so pathetic that it was difficult not to feel sorry for her. “It would break my mother’s heart to know what’s become of her. Can’t you at least try?”

“Why would I do that? Out of the goodness of my heart? Because I feel something for her other than hatred?” He crossed his arms over his chest. “I am only standing here because she threatened my friends, the only family I have left, with death. That’s not grounds for you to ask me anything.”

“She’s my sister. And I thought you were a Jedi once. You helped people.”

“People that are worth the help.” He stood up. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to start drinking so I can go through with this day.”

“Anakin, wait—”

“ _What?_ This day is already complicated enough!”

“At least give her a chance.”

“I think, out of the two of us, you are the one who doesn’t know her. If you did, you would stay far, far away from this planet, this _system_. You would pick a nice, quiet place to stay and raise a family. Without her and her tentacles tainting it,” Anakin advised her. “Be smart. Leave. You can do it, I can’t.”

“You can’t tell me you wouldn’t do anything for the people you love.”

“It’s why I’m standing right here.”

“Then understand that I cannot give up on my sister, no matter how great the odds against me are.” Sola sighed. “I need to finish helping her dress now.”

“You’ll have to save her by yourself,” he replied coolly. “Some people just can’t be saved.” Sola only shot him a brief glare as she hurried out of the room.

Anakin scowled. _The audacity…_ He needed to find Rex. The Captain had been assigned to his personal detail and Anakin knew he could rely on the trooper to get half-drunk so he could at least say ‘I do’.

* * *

“You are radiant, my dear.”

“Thank you, Father.” Padmé spun around, letting the crystals of her bodice and skirt catch the light. “You’ve been so generous with me for this day, it’s the happiest I’ve ever been.” 

“You did well, daughter, on bringing the Chosen One to me. Not only will he turn into a fantastic Apprentice, but his strength in the Force far surpasses Dooku and anyone in the Galaxy that could fit the role of my grandchild’s father,” he said, adjusting his ceremonial robes in the mirror. “You deserve a little reward for the good work.”

“Besides getting to keep him for my toy, you mean?” Padmé asked curiously. “Because I want that, Father. I want to play with him until he breaks. And even afterward.”

“While I do want you to keep him in line, Padmé, I still need to train the boy and remove Kenobi’s training from him, layer by layer. You will need to keep him together so I can do the rest of the work myself. Play with him all you want, make sure your playfulness bears fruit. Other than that, leave the boy to me.”

“Yes, Father, I understand. I won’t disappoint you the way Mother did.”

“I sincerely hope not,” Sheev said, turning to her. “Can we get the celebrations started?”

“One moment, your majesty.” Sabé moved forward to place the silver-tinted veil on Padmé’s head, spreading the gossamer fabric over the Princess’ shoulders. “There, my princess, now you’re perfect.”

“Thank you, my friend.” Padmé brushed her handmaiden’s arm with a smile.

“You look beautiful, Padmé,” Sola spoke emotionally. “I wish Mother were here to see you.”

“Oh, yes, of course,” Padmé said, nodding distractedly at her half-sister. Truthfully, she’d almost forgotten Sola was there. It was always so convenient to do so. “I’m sure she’d be happy for me. Just as you are?”

Sighing sadly, Sola nodded. “I’m sure as well. She did love you very much. I’m happy as long as you are.”

“Of course you are. The whole galaxy is celebrating today!” Padmé laughed merrily, slipping her arm into her father’s. “I’m ready now.”

“At last,” Sheev muttered. “It’s time. I want everyone to be prepared and nothing should interrupt this wedding. Nothing! This is my daughter’s day. This is where the next generation of my Empire truly begins.” 

Padmé smiled, and while her expression was beautiful, it did not quite reach her eyes. The reminder of what needed to come from this marriage had put her just slightly on edge. “Our Empire, Father,” she corrected softly. “Our dynasty.”

“Of course, dear, of course,” he says as if he was entertaining her. Her smile faltered at the insincerity, but only for a moment. She couldn’t afford to look anything other than blissfully happy as they stepped out into the throne room. Dignitaries from every corner of the galaxy had assembled, and all their eyes were on her. For her part, she kept her gaze on the end of the aisle, where Anakin stood, supported by Captain Rex. 

Anakin raised his eyes to see her enter. She was swallowed by the sparkle of her dress, her veil, and the jewels, and he grimaced looking down at his feet again. He couldn’t believe this was actually happening. He was getting _married._ He should be drunker, but Rex had not allowed him to be served any more alcohol until after the ceremony. The Captain had grumbled he was lucky to be standing as it was, let alone one more drink. Anakin sighed. Not even liquid courage worked. He needed all the willpower not to jump out of one of the windows.

Padmé reached the edge of the steps and her handmaidens lifted up her skirts to help her ascend and stand next to Anakin as her father stood between the two of them and Anakin finally lifted his gaze to meet hers. Appearances had to be maintained. Padmé reached out and gripped his hand as the Emperor began to speak.

“Today is a most joyous day, not only for the Empire, but for me personally. It warms this father’s heart to know that his daughter has found a partner truly worthy of her.” _At least he didn’t use the words 'true love,'_ Anakin scoffed internally as he hoped to the Force that this suffering ended quickly. “Through this union, the galaxy is strengthened,” Palpatine continued. “And we shall all prosper. Padmé, my dearest and only child, do you accept Anakin Skywalker as your husband, from this day until the end of your days?”

“I do gladly accept him,” Padmé answered serenely, “from this day until the end of my days, through storm and sunshine, prosperity and famine, sorrow and joy.”

“Anakin Skywalker, do you accept Padmé Palpatine as your wife, from this day until the end of your days?” The Emperor’s yellow-eyed gaze turned on Anakin, burning into him with a silent, lethal threat.

“I do,” he replied calmly. There would be nothing else he would add to that statement. He wasn’t lovesick. The two simple words were difficult enough to utter, let alone the rest of the kriff damned sentence.

“Then it is my great pleasure to present you to the galaxy as husband and wife, your union sealed now and forever with a kiss.”

He looks resigned as he steps a bit closer to his _wife_ and leans down to peck her lips, before quickly pulling away, not giving her the opportunity to draw blood this time. It wouldn’t look good on the HoloNet. Padmé compensated for the briefness of the kiss by embracing him, leaning her head on his chest as cameras flashed. “Pushing it, are we?” He mumbled into her veil and carefully combed brown curls.

“Smile,” she retorted, pulling back and facing the crowds. “We still have a reception.”

“How exciting,” he said with a fake smile plastered on his face. “Is this better? Or do you prefer a different kind? A bit wider, shyer, I don’t know.”

“Stop being a child.” She gripped his hand very tightly as she pulled him down the stairs and through the hall.

“Look who’s talking,” he hissed as he fell in step with her. “Do you know the dress is wearing you and not the other way around?”

“It’s a statement.”

“Or a way to make people go blind. It sparkles so much it’s a wonder that all that appears on the holos are not just the flashes being reflected.”

“Anakin. Stop it.”

“With all the decor, I thought you would wear red. Or black. As your soul.” He forced himself to keep smiling. “Or at least to match the carpet.”

“Brides wear white,” she retorted. “That’s the way it’s done.”

“This wedding is _all_ about tradition, isn’t it?” He snorted. She responded by pulling him down and kissing him. She did not bite him, but she held him there long enough that the HoloNet could get plenty of images of it. Pulling away, he pursed his lips. “You know the best thing about this wedding?”

“The wedding night?” she said, smirking in a way that made it plain she knew that wasn’t what he meant.

“The open bar,” he drawled out, looking sick at the thought of the night he had ahead.

“You’ve already had enough to drink, I think, husband,” she scolded.

“Oh, no I haven’t, if I’m going to go ahead with this day without choking you with the veil, I‘m going to need a lot more.” He hissed, putting some distance between them. “You should mingle with your peers. Do something other than squeeze my kriffing hand,” he growled, snatching his hand away and flexing his fingers.

“People expect us together,” she argued.

"Too bad. Explain that I'm not that sociable. I don't know. Be creative!" Anakin scowled. "I already have to dance with you in that monstrosity, cut a cake, and pretend I'm a lovesick shaak while we leave for our _honeymoon_ ," he basically gagged at the last word. 

Turning his back on her, he dodged the well-wishers, opting to let them crowd the blushing bride. Sheev was entertained, speaking with his political subjects, spreading the word of the Empire. Anakin snorted to himself. It was like a cult. He wondered how Obi-Wan and Ahsoka were. Were they watching this spectacle somewhere in the Galaxy, in a Rebel base? He missed them. More than he thought. 

They had been fighting this war, together, for years. They were his brother and sister. They were there when the Tuskens killed his mother and her new family. They’d stopped him from falling to the Dark Side when the grief overwhelmed him. He was stronger with them. 

Now… He was alone and he didn't have a problem admitting that he was weak. The Dark Side already was appealing whenever he felt his anger best him, but now, nurtured by Sheev Palpatine, Darth Sidious, it was a force to be reckoned with. He hoped that the day he turned, Obi-Wan wouldn't hesitate. Becoming a Sith would be the worst fate Anakin could think of, and for his mother, for Obi-Wan and Ahsoka, he would resist it as long as he possibly could. But taking into consideration who currently pulled his strings, he didn't think he could resist as long as he would like to. 

Out of the corner of his eyes, he spotted Bail and Breha Organa, both looking as uncomfortable as he felt in this morbid farce of a celebration. He thought about speaking with them. The only people he really knew and had any consideration for, but he had already gotten them into so much trouble, he didn't want to cause more. 

A few strangers approached him, offering congratulations and calling him ‘Prince Anakin’ and ‘your highness’ which just made him seek out the bar faster.

“Your highness,” the barman greeted and he cringed. “What can I serve you?”

“Whatever gets me drunk faster,” he replied dryly. “Pour it generously.”

* * *

Padmé bit her lip as she watched Anakin slumping against Rex while they said goodbye to the last of their guests. The sight of her inebriated husband was making it harder for her to look forward to their wedding night. 

“The ship is prepared to depart, your highness,” Dormé said and she observed her lady’s new husband with a raised eyebrow. “Everything that you’ve requested will be heading to Varykino with you.”

“Wonderful,” Padmé nodded, placing a hand on her handmaiden’s arm. “Thank you, my friend. You and the others enjoy your holiday while I’m gone.”

“Of course, Princess. Shall we get you dressed for travel now that the last guests have departed?”

“We can give some caff to your husband, see if he can be sobered up,” Eirtaé offered.

“I can handle him,” the Emperor offered silkily. “A little heart to heart between a new father and son.”

“Thank you, Daddy,” Padmé said, kissing him on the cheek with a bright smile. “Don’t keep him too long.”

“I won’t. Just a couple of words for the journey. Go change. I’ll handle the boy.” Padmé and her handmaidens swept away in a flurry of skirts and petticoats, leaving Anakin alone with the SIth.

“I hope we will be able to welcome another addition to the family soon,” Sidious said, his pleasant demeanor dissolving into the cold menace of a Sith Lord.

“I guess we will be working on that over the honeymoon,” Anakin slurred before sighing. “Master.” A wizened hand gripped his arm, and the Dark Side’s presence grew stronger. “I think your daughter knows what to do, she’s been speaking about the wedding night since I arrived. We’ll just have to let nature work. The Force will know what to do.” He added as the presence sickened him

“It’s in your best interest to be _enthusiastic_ about this, boy. Whatever deals you have with my daughter, they can be voided if the two of you fail to do your duty.” An electric current ran through Anakin’s body before Sidious released his grip on his arm. “Go to your wife now.”

The electric current was so painful on all his muscles, that not even the haze of the alcohol managed to contain it. He was vibrating, not in a positive way. _Sith lightning._ Anakin had both heard and read about it, and apparently, he’d just had his first taste of it. It made him feel a cold shiver and his stomach dropped as he nodded. “Yes, Master,” he said almost breathlessly as he stood up and went to follow his _wife_ and her handmaidens. He was terrified of entering that ship. Padmé had spent the entire reception looking at him like a piece of meat and her whispering and giggling with her handmaidens had made him nervous and uneasy.

They were taking a silver Nubian yacht rather than the tri-winged shuttle that had brought him to this Force-forsaken planet, but it looked just as foreboding to him as the shuttle had. Its ramp being open made it look like a creature ready to swallow him. Fitting, if he thought about it.

“Ready, sir? You should board.” Rex said quietly.

“Can you throw me off-board during the journey?” Anakin groaned, dropping his head on his hands.

“No offense, sir, but I don’t want to know what kind of punishment that would merit from the Emperor. Or your wife.” Rex sighed. “I’m sorry.”

“What if I proactively jump? I can do it,” he was filled with sudden panic. “I know I can trust you, Rex, what if I give you a message to deliver my friends after my death? I can jump off of this ship or anything else and you won’t get the blame, I don’t have to endure this any longer and I can still give them a message, a warning,” his breathing was ragged as his mind started to race. “Maybe if I died, by my own choosing, no one would get hurt.”

“She’s not going to kill you, sir.”

“No, she’ll do worse.”

“Don’t think there really is anything worse than death,” Rex said bluntly. “Everything else is some kind of temporary.”

“Do you _know_ these people?” Anakin asked in a harsh whisper. “What they are _capable_ of?” He scowled.

“I’ve served them all my life, sir.”

“If you knew what was out there… you wouldn’t want to be here.”

“I’ve been at the front, sir,” Rex said, sounding a little offended. “I wasn’t always assigned to protect your wife.”

“You should be worse at your job,” Anakin hissed before thundering up the ramp, hoping he could lock himself in the cabin he had previously occupied on his trip to Coruscant and only see Padmé when they arrived whatever ‘Varykino’ was.

“Anakin.” Padmé appeared at the top of the ramp, wearing a form-fitting white dress overlaid with a sheer fabric decorated with golden geometric shapes and matching capelet. “Are you coming, or do I have to make you?” 

“ _Kriff_ ,” he whispered, halting his step, tripping over his own feet and nearly falling on his ass. The electricity might have started his body again after all he had consumed, but the influence of the drink still made him a bit unstable. “I’m coming,” he said through gritted teeth.

“Good boy.” Her red-painted lips curled up in a mocking smile as she beckoned him closer. “There’s so much I want to do, and so little time to do it in.”

“I’m going to rest at my cabin until we arrive,” he declared, stepping back from her.

“Oh, pet, there’s only one cabin in my personal yacht,” she said, clucking her tongue as the cabin closed behind them. “But if you’re really that eager, I suppose I can make do with what we have.”

“I would rather jump into space,” he said dryly. 

“Anakin, remind me what our agreement was?”

“We didn’t agree that I had to be nice to you.”

“We agreed you were mine.” She pushed him against the cabin wall, hands on his chest to keep him pinned in place as the ship began to take off. “In every sense of the word.”

He grunted as she forced him back and he collided with the steel of the ship. “Fine. I never said I would do it quietly.”

“Hmm.” Her right hand slipped down, under the waist of his pants to grab his cock without warning as her left hand wrapped around his neck and brought his face close enough for her to kiss.

Anakin gasped in shock, as he felt her sudden, intimate touch and he flexed his hands against the wall, hoping that the kiss would just end and she would take her hand from his pants. She offered no such reprieve, her grip staying tight as her hand moved up and down the shaft and her tongue forced its way further and further into his mouth. He hissed as she continued her onslaught on his body and just closed his eyes, ignoring how she was waking up a sexual part of him. He felt himself harden in her hands and she acted as experienced as he thought her so. How many partners had she already taken and _kriff,_ why hadn’t any of them knocked her up? It was what Sheev was obsessed with.

“You’re not a virgin, are you, sweet?” she asked, releasing her grip and withdrawing her hand. The tips of her fingers were stained with a liquid that had to be his own pre-cum, and she raised them to her lips, licking them clean while she kept her eyes on him. “Oh, you _are._ ”

“Not all of us can be whores,” he said hotly, as a flush crept over to his cheeks and he felt embarrassed. She huffed.

“You sound like Father, calling me that.”

“I’m a good apprentice.”

“Then let me enlighten you on a few details.” She removed the capelet of her dress and started twisting it in her hands. “No one has ever _known_ me the way you’re going to. To put it more crudely, I’m used to _doing_ the fucking.”

“What an honor,” he drawled out, rolling his eyes and focusing on anything else but her.

“I’m not stupid enough that I would compromise the security of my future child’s inheritance.” She grabbed his hands and began wrapping the capelet around his wrists. 

“You have to be kidding me!” Anakin complained, widening his eyes. “What the kriff do you think you’re doing?” He struggled with her hold, pulling his wrists away from her grasp.

“Teaching you what it means to be mine,” she answered. Surprisingly, she did not seem angry, merely calculating as she watched him. “Keep someone locked in a tower long enough, and they grab at any means of control they can find. That’s what my toys have been for. Up until now.”

“You’re crazier than I thought,” he scoffed, throwing the capelet on the ground. “I’m not going to do this. Just… _no_. I am not playing your sick games.”

“I suppose it is a little early for that.” She ran her fingers through his hair. “My innocent angel of a husband. I’m going to have so many things to show you, so many things the Jedi denied you.”

“ _Kriff_ ,” was all he whispered under his breath before brushing past her and tried to search for the fresher, _somewhere_ he could hide until they landed and he got himself under control. He found the fresher and locked the doors as he felt his stomach turn. He had barely eaten, but he had spent the day drinking on an empty stomach. Adding Sidious’ threat and Padmé’s bold move, and he had too much. He threw up whatever it was inside of his stomach. He didn’t know how long it actually was, but when he sat on the ground, with a migraine and an acid taste on his lips, he could feel the ship had entered hyperspace.

The door opened and Padmé stepped in, holding a red velvet blanket that she wrapped around his shoulders, rubbing at them gently through the fabric. “I’m sorry,” she said gently.

“Don’t touch me,” he asked weakly, and to his surprise, she complied, lifting her hands from his back. “I don’t need a blanket,” he took it off and pushed it away. “Just leave. I thought I had locked the door.”

“It’s my yacht. I have an override code,” she explained, setting a plate with a loaf of bread on the floor next to the discarded blanket. “Eat something when you feel ready. I’ll be in bed, the droids have orders to wake me when we’re approaching Naboo.” He nodded distractedly, shuffling so he could lean his head against something cold and the durasteel wall provided him the perfect support. The only indication that she’d left was the sound of her skirts rustling. Anakin sighed and closed his eyes. Maybe he could sleep too.

* * *

 _Naboo is in range. Estimated time to arrival, one standard hour._ Padmé rose from her bed and returned to the main cabin of the yacht, watching her family’s homeworld come into view.

“We’ll be landing shortly, your highness,” Rex bowed his head. “Is there anything you need me to do before the ship docks?”

“Check on my husband,” she said, not bothering to look at the clone. “Make sure he’s alright.”

“Yes, your highness,” Rex said dutifully before turning around and heading to the yacht’s fresher where Anakin had stayed for the whole time. While the Princess slept, the Captain had slipped the new ‘Prince’ water and medicine for the hangover, but Anakin really hadn’t moved, and instead had thrown up a few more times. “Sir?” Anakin grumbled something and placed a hand over his eyes. “Sir, we’ll be landing shortly.”

Anakin stared up at the clone groggily. “How long?”

“One more hour, sir,” Rex said. “The Princess is already awake.”

Sighing, Anakin stood up and stretched, grabbing the remaining water and drinking it. The blanket and bread Padmé had brought him earlier were still in the same spot as when she left. “Of course she is,” he whispered, combing his blonde curls with his fingers.

“Uh, sir, you have, uh,” Rex paused, gesturing awkwardly, “I think morning wood is the term?”

“Oh, _kriff,_ ” Anakin turned around, flushing red and tugging at his roots. “Can I have my cape? _Please_?” He underestimated her effect on him, even if he wanted nothing to do with her, his body was just responding to instinct. As she had guessed, he was a virgin and it was very difficult to control his urges.

“Right away, sir.” Rex ducked out of the fresher and returned a moment later with the black cape. “Any reason you didn’t take the blanket? It was right there.”

“Do I look like someone who looks good in red?” He hissed, taking the cape from the clone’s hands and dressing in it, closing it at the front and choosing to cross his arms to further prevent him from being embarrassed in front of the whole squadron. “Besides, I don’t need her things,” he sniffed.

“Suit yourself,” Rex said with a shrug, leaving the room without another word.

 _Great, I managed to anger him too. Awesome. Fan-kriffing-tastic._ He took a deep breath, his head was still ringing and he felt tired but he didn’t think it would matter to his new wife. He left the fresher and tried to keep his head down as clones brushed past him, giving him odd looks. He entered the main cabin of the yacht, hissing as the noise intensified the pounding in his head.

“Eating really does help with a hangover,” his wife said bluntly from her seat by the viewports. “That’s why I gave you the bread. It absorbs excess alcohol.”

“I felt sick. I threw up. I didn’t want to eat,” he replied, leaning against the edge of the viewport.

“Then consider this advice for the future, if you plan on repeating that behavior at future events. And there _will_ be future events. Father will expect it.”

“ _Fun_ ,” he said dryly, shifting uncomfortably.

“They’re horrible,” she agreed. “But it’s a duty that comes with our station.”

“Do I really have to be a Prince?” Anakin asked. “Can’t I be something else?” Publicly at least. He knew he was a slave behind closed doors.

“That’d be Father’s decision, not mine, you’ll have to bring it up with him.”

“Something to look forward to, then.”

“Don’t be so melodramatic. It’s getting tiresome.”

“Tired of me?” He asked with some sort of glee. “I’ll be more than happy to leave!”

“That’s not how this works, Anakin,” she sighed. “Father’s not going to let you go that easily. Trust me, you’re better off with me than not.”

“You’re two peas in a pod,” he declared. “Crazy runs in the family, apparently. Why you would _willingly_ submit any child to this, I don’t know, but I am not here to interpret your insanity.”

“My reasons are not insanity, they are practicality,” Padmé answered calmly. “Our current arrangement allows for some level of autonomy. Which will disappear if Father decides we aren’t doing enough to give him what he wants. Do you want to know what will happen then?”

“No, and I don’t care.”

“Well, you should, because it will end with you and every other male Force-sensitive in the galaxy being used to breed me constantly until one of you succeeds in getting me pregnant with a child he considers worthy of being his heir.”

Anakin was quiet. It sounded disgustingly like Sidious to make a threat of that magnitude and to show what he was willing to do to his daughter, only showed how far he was willing to go to achieve his goal. He didn’t reply. The idea was an abomination. He just looked out of the viewport and into the beautiful lakes of Naboo. 

“It’s how my mother died,” she admitted softly. “Father wanted a son, one that was strong in the Force. The little I remember of her, she was always pregnant. But I was the only one of their children who survived. We lost her along with a stillborn boy when I was five.”

He was going to be sick again and he paled considerably. “Yet, you still stand proudly at his side. Bowing to his wishes. It just shows _who_ you are.”

“I owe him everything, he’s my father.”

“And you are his incubator. Great relationship goals. Will you have those with your daughter?”

“You’d need to get me pregnant before I can answer that.”

“All I hear are excuses.”

“What am I supposed to do?” she challenged. “In case you haven’t noticed, _I am not Force-sensitive._ I could not oppose him even if I wanted to. It’s easier to do what he wants and take what little I can.”

He whirled around, fire and passion for his cause burning in his blue eyes. “I don’t know if your little brain knows this, but the Rebel Alliance is not made up of Jedi. Your father made sure most of the Order was hunted and killed. The younglings were burned alive just for good measure. Most of the Alliance is made up of men and women, not Force-sensitive, who are willing to sacrifice their wealth, their health and their safety,” he thought of Breha and Bail, “in order for the Galaxy to have a better tomorrow. You just don’t want to give up your lavish dresses. It would be _so_ bad when you didn’t have a nice, big, comfy bed to lie in at night. And oh, let’s not forget your _toys_ apparently. What is life without playing, right?” He ended rhetorically.

“By all means, try to work with the Rebel Alliance while living in his palace, constantly under his gaze,” she scoffed. “I’ll start ordering my mourning attire.”

“Shocking. Something you still don’t have,” he leaned against the viewport again and noticed they were just landing. “You’re not lacking excuses though,” he muttered to himself.

“I don’t pretend to know what your life was like, don’t pretend to know what mine has been.”

“Where the kriff are we, anyway?” He asked, knowing that sticking to the subject was probably going to lead him to do something stupid.

“We’re on Naboo. We’ll be spending two weeks at Varykino, an estate in the Lake Country.”

“Two weeks?” He questioned. “For what?”

“It’s called a honeymoon, husband dear. Those happen after weddings.”

Anakin made a face as Rex entered the cabin, saluting them. “We’ve arrived and the trunks are being unloaded. The estate is fully prepared to receive you.”

“Thank you, Captain.” Padmé nodded politely. “Efficient as always.”

“Anything else I can do for you, your highnesses?”

“Just continue to make sure everything’s secure. And that we have privacy.”

The Chosen One closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the durasteel. Why was the Force allowing this hell to happen to him?


	4. A Taste of Danger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is our first "don't try this at home" chapter!  
> There will be two instances of sex being had without affirmative consent (that is, consent that is mutually and enthusiastically given), the second of which involves some lighter-fare BDSM (restraints, spanking, edging). Neither is particularly graphic or violent, but we recommend proceeding with caution.

In many ways, Varykino was very similar to the woman who owned it— breathtakingly beautiful, but representing something dark and terrible.

“Where are my things?” He asked, looking around. He needed a shower. A change of clothes and a lot of sleep.

“Being brought to our rooms,” his wife answered, twisting her hair up into a knot and sliding a long jeweled pin into it, holding it in place. “Along with my own things.”

“Oh, no,” he shook his head. “I want my own room.”

“That’s not all you want, is it?” Her eyes wandered down towards his waist with a smirk.

“Do you really want to ask me what I want?” Anakin huffed and wrapped his cape around him, knowing very well her intent. He was not going to give her the pleasure of asking her for anything. Anything at all.

“Anakin, despite what you might have learned from the Jedi, sex and desire are not things to be ashamed of.”

“That’s not what I’m ashamed of,” he rolled his eyes. “And I want to rest. Take a shower. Sleep. Where will my bedroom be?”

“Maybe I should have chosen Kenobi after all,” she huffed, leaning against the railing of the balcony. “At least _he’d_ be cooperating right now.”

Anakin snorted and actually laughed. “You’re an idiot. Obi-Wan would have made Sheev kill him already. Or committed suicide. He’s too much of a righteous man to be turned to the Dark Side and he loves a lucky woman too much to even be attracted to the likes of you.”

“That’s a very roundabout way of admitting you’re attracted to me.”

“You think very highly of yourself, don’t you?” He raised one eyebrow.

“I have eyes, Anakin. But let’s discuss this rationally, shall we?” She gestured for him to join her. “We will be here for ten days, and the wedding was arranged in part to coincide with the optimal time for me to conceive. Give me what I need and I’ll give you what you want. We’ll take care of each other, each in our own way. Wouldn’t that be so much easier than fighting me at every turn?”

He looked at her for a moment, thinking if she really heard herself and if she actually thought she made sense. “All I have to do is give you a baby. Right?” Anakin asked, calmly, looking over at the blue lake. The view from the balcony was stunning, he couldn’t deny that.

“Yes.”

Anakin smiled, but it wasn’t one of happiness. No, it did not even reach his eyes. “You’re crazier than I thought,” he stated quietly. “Never, _never_ will I willingly submit an innocent life to you, or to him. You can do whatever you want with me, that’s why I’m here, but on what I can control, it won’t happen,” he pulled back. “Fake a pregnancy. Adopt. Get a lover. Do whatever you want to fix it, but I’m not doing it.”

“Isn’t that still submitting an innocent life to me, as you put it?” she countered. “And didn’t we already establish what happens if my father isn’t satisfied?”

“I am _not_ having a baby with you,” he said hotly. Knowing this would become an issue, he’d have to take precautions into making sure it didn’t happen. “That was not what I agreed to. We can do whatever you want, but that’s not happening. What do I have to do, and I’ll do anything for you to leave me alone for a _day_?”

She considered him through narrowed eyes, a long silence stretching between them before she finally spoke. “I’ll have your things moved into one of the guest rooms and you can be alone until sunset. But then you’re in my room for the night. That can be our standing arrangement, for the time being. What you do with the hours of the day, I don’t care, as long as you don’t get yourself into trouble.”

Anakin tensed but it was a better deal than what he could believe. “Fine. Whatever. Yes. You have a deal.”

“Good. Then I’ll see you tonight.” She turned on her heel and disappeared into the manor.

* * *

“Don’t knock again,” Anakin opened the bedroom door to glare at Rex. “I heard you the first couple of hundred times. I still _have_ a few minutes.”

“I just got what you asked me for.” Rex held out the small bottle of pills. “Standard issue for clones.”

“Oh,” he shakily took the bottle. “Thank you, Rex. I mean it. _Thank you_. How and when do I take them?”

“One with water before… engaging.” Rex coughed. “They last about twelve hours.”

“Then I should hurry,” Anakin gripped the bottle and reentered his bedroom. He grabbed a glass of water from the nightstand and took a pill from the bottle, taking it. After, he looked around. He needed to hide the pills, but he needed a good place. A great place, one where Padmé could never discover. He looked over at Rex. “You keep them. You’re in charge of my security now and you’ll always be with me anyway. It’s too dangerous for me to keep them myself.”

“Understood, sir.” Rex took the bottle back, tucking it into the pack at his waist. “Uh, good luck, I guess.”

Ever since he woke up, he had been dreading the sunset. After Padmé disappeared, he was assigned a guest bedroom and he managed to shower and sleep, waking up a few hours before sunset. He took the time to eat a little of the meal he was given, but mostly to meditate. To align himself with the Force, the Light Side. He thought back to Obi-Wan’s teaching and all those classes as a youngling. He focused on the good, so he could breathe a little easier. Of course, now, his stomach was in knots and his heart thundered in his ribcage as he closed the door behind him and looked down the hallway, to the door where his _wife_ was waiting for him.

“Thank you,” his shoulders dropped. “I guess.”

Rex gave him a sympathetic look, before leaving. The Princess had required privacy and no one dared to go against her. Anakin dragged his feet towards her door and he stood in front of it for a few minutes before raising his fist and making a face, knocked on it. He had a plan. He would stay calm, speak as little as possible, and just endure whatever torture she had prepared without becoming too revealing.

The door opened to reveal his wife standing before him in a dress of white lace with a plunging neckline and a skirt that revealed a substantial amount of her legs. She’d let her hair down and the curls were framing her face, which was free of cosmetics.

“As agreed, I’m here,” he said, trying very hard for his eyes to not linger on all the skin she was showing. He hated her but unfortunately for him, at the moment, he was a man and his body was betraying him. Her dress was revealing and it disarmed him. Anakin was convinced it had been the intention all along, she already knew how to play the game. On _that,_ she had an advantage. 

“So you are.” She stepped aside and gestured for him to enter, instructions that he followed. “Before we go any further, I give you my word now that I will stop if you ask me to.”

“Why would I need to ask you that?” 

“I’m trying to be consistent in our boundaries,” she replied silkily. “I intend to ease you into things tonight. It’s your first time. But it might be different for another night. And if at any point it becomes too much, you give me what’s called a safeword. Something you wouldn’t normally say. Something like ‘hyper-drive,’ or—”

“Or ‘love’. That’s not a word you’re going to hear from me. It works.” If it hurt her, she didn’t let it show on her face.

“If that’s what you want, then that’s what we’ll use,” she said calmly. “Now then.” He looked at her, not moving. She lowered the straps of her dress, letting her breasts spring free as she dropped the gown to the floor and stood before him, completely naked. His lips parted involuntarily. That body was kriffing perfect and it was already making him hard. He loathed her, but he couldn’t, unfortunately, help the attraction his body felt for hers. He hated that he was so weak in this department. That he didn’t know how to control his own body. She approached him, pressing her lips gently against his neck as she worked at removing his shirt. He suppressed a moan as he felt the material slip from his shoulders and down his arms. There was a rip as she tore at the fabric, rather than break the kiss to actually look at what she was doing, and his shirt fell to join her gown on the floor.

“On the bed,” she whispered huskily, pushing him towards the blue velvet covers. “Lay back.”

Letting out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, he climbed onto the bed and laid on his back, staring at the ceiling and taking a deep breath as he closed his eyes for a brief moment. At the feeling of a weight on his lap, he opened them to see Padmé had straddled his waist, her sculpted backside resting against his cock with only his clothes between them. Taking his hands, she placed them on her breasts, guiding them in a circular motion as her hips began to rock back and forth.

His body tensed as he felt something deep in his stomach. Anakin allowed her to continue to guide his movements as he shifted underneath her, hissing at how his hard cock brushed against his pants. “That’s it,” she crooned, raising her hips until they were no longer touching. “Is this the first time you’ve cum?” she teased, reaching down to pull at the fabric.

“No,” Anakin replied as he lifted his bottom from the bed to help the fabric slide easily. He felt dirty that he was starting to enjoy himself. Like it was wrong.

“Well, it may feel like the first time after this.” Before he could ask what she meant, she placed her lips at the tip of his cock and he gasped. She smirked up at him before opening her mouth wider to take almost the full length of his shaft inside. Anakin moaned at the different sensation, his fists grasping at the blue covers as he pressed his eyes closed. Her tongue swirled back and forth as she sucked at his member, and he heard her voice in his mind. _Cum for me, Angel._ He lifted his hips as he felt his orgasm build in his lower stomach. Moaning, Anakin’s breathing came faster as the sensation tipped over and he let out a loud gasp, his muscles tensing as his orgasm rolled over his body. Padmé didn’t falter, practically drinking his spend as it spilled out and pulling back only when he had finished. “Well?” she prompted, licking the strands of ejaculate from her lips with a smirk. He just grunted as he eased his grip on the sheets and regained control of his breathing, or tried to. “I thought so. I’ll give you a moment to recover.” She rolled off the bed and strode to her vanity table, picking up a vial of pink substance that filled the room with a sweet scent when she removed the stopper.

Anakin looked back at the ceiling. He was afraid to know what was that. She coated her fingers with the substance, then reached down and began to rub it on the folds of her womanhood. “It’s a lubricant, Angel,” she laughed slightly. “It makes it easier for both of us.”

“Okay,” he replied, trying to decipher all the shapes of the chandelier. The colors on the ceiling. Something to distract himself and ten days was a long time to spend on that position. “Good.”

“Yes, it is,” she agreed, placing the vial back on the vanity before climbing back on the bed, straddling him once more. “I’ve been dreaming of a moment like this for a very long time,” she whispered, leaning in to kiss him on the lips, then moved down along his neck and chest, occasionally nipping at his skin.

He let out little whimpers as his hands fisted the covers again. Her weight on top of him was making that pleasurable pressure grow in his lower stomach again and her mouth all over his body was just fueling that. She pressed a kiss to the palm of his right hand, then stopped as she saw his forearm. “This is an odd little scar,” she mused, tracing the pattern of white skin. “How’d you get it?”

Anakin opened his eyes long enough to understand exactly what it was. He closed them again as he almost didn’t reply. “Slave chip.” He shouldn’t have said it but, what harm could it do? And honestly, he wanted her to continue, to both of his releases. Of his pleasure and of this bedroom.

“I see.” Her lips brushed very delicately against the scar as she reached back and grabbed his cock, aligning it against her folds. “Breathe now, Angel, and lift up on three. One. Two. _Three._ ”

He tensed as he sheathed himself inside her, gasping at the sensation and, due to his inexperience, almost spilled immediately. She was warm and tight and it was delicious. He forgot about the entire situation for one second and just allowed himself to _feel_. Her hips swayed against him as she leaned back, her entire torso undulating until she spilled with a wordless cry of ecstasy that pushed him over the edge as well. As her shriek died down, she fell against him, her legs entwining with his. He tried to regain control of his breathing as he marveled in the afterglow of his first time.

“You did very well,” she murmured, placing a hand on his chest, just above his heart.

“Hmm,” he took a deep breath. “Is it over?” He was grasping at straws, she wouldn't let him leave so easily, but he had to try.

“I won’t stop you if you want to leave,” she replied, brushing his hair back and he was surprised by that. “I’ll see you tomorrow night for dinner.” The way she said it made it clear it wasn’t a question.

“If I stay, do we need to have dinner tomorrow?” He tried to negotiate.

“Yes, we do.” He rolled his eyes. He was so tired and spent, he didn’t have the strength to argue. “There are things that need to be discussed before things go further, and I’d rather do it when you have a little more blood in your head, rather than your _head._ ” She disentangled their legs and pulled back, stroking the deflating tip of his cock as it withdrew. “I’m satisfied enough for tonight. Sleep here. Sleep in your room. Whatever suits you. I’m going to bathe.”

“I’m leaving for my room,” he announced as he sat on the bed and rubbed his hand over his face before leaning down and grabbing his pants, pulling them on. As he passed his shirt, he saw that it was ruined, so it could stay there. He would have no use for that.

“Goodnight, _husband,_ ” she purred, running a single finger down his spine as she passed by him. As the haze of lust dissipated, he tensed and didn’t reply, opting to leave, slamming the door closed behind him.

* * *

Anakin was torn. He was torn between hating her and hating himself. Sex with her had left him satisfied and he had actually enjoyed the act. But his current situation had made it impossible to be one hundred percent happy with himself. He had fallen asleep right as he hit the bed and when he woke up, his lunch was being brought to him. He nipped the food, not really hungry, and took a shower before using his time to meditate.

He knew he had to use all the alone time he had to focus on the teachings he had learned at the Temple. The Order was never perfect, far from it. But it upheld morals and higher value. It upheld the protection of innocent lives. A different Code, different leadership would have made it perfect, but the Empire decided that they should all burn before that.

Thinking back to those first few weeks on the Temple, alone and scared. The lessons. The Masters. How Obi-Wan became a brother, a mentor, someone he could trust his life to. He thought back to when Ahsoka was presented to him as his Padawan and he denied it until he realized she was just like him. In need of guidance and someone to understand her. She wouldn’t be able to make it as Obi-Wan’s Padawan, but she could as his. And she did and he was so incredibly proud of her.

A knock on the door and he finally opened his eyes, realizing he had been levitating in the middle of the room. Sighing, he came down to be on his feet, realizing the sun was beginning to set.

“Yes?”

“Sir,” Rex entered, closing the door behind him. “The Princess is requesting your presence for dinner. It will be held outside, on the veranda.”

Anakin nodded. “I need to take it now, I don’t know if she’ll allow me back to my room.”

Nodding, the captain handed the bottle of pills to him and Anakin took another one with water. “Tell her I’m just going to change and I’ll join her.” 

Most of the wardrobe Padmé had commissioned for him was black, some other pieces had red or gold, ones with dark blue to probably match his eyes, but he opted for simple black robes and his cape. No doubt she would be wearing something extravagant, but he wasn’t in a mood to be extra or even to make an effort. 

Leaving the bedroom, he walked downstairs to the foyer and out into the veranda, where their dinner table was set, overlooking the gorgeous Varykino lake and sunset. His wife sat at one end of the table, her wide crimson velvet skirts tapering into a black lace corset and collar that contrasted with her pale skin. Her hair was pinned up under a crown of twisting black metal and blood-red gems, and on her right hand, a bracelet of black lace with a scarlet flower was connected by a chain to a ring on her index finger, She looked every bit as beautiful and wicked as he had ever seen her. “You were almost late,” she informed him, taking a small sip of wine from the crystal goblet in front of her.

“Why do you always have to look so extra?” He asked dryly, taking a seat at the other end of the table. “You look like you’re heading off to an Opera performance.”

“Would you prefer me in Jedi robes?” she asked, her tone light and mocking. “Or perhaps you liked what I wore last night better.”

He huffed. “I just don’t understand.”

“My wardrobe is one of my little freedoms, Anakin. I dress to suit my mood, and say what words cannot. Consider it ‘extra,’ if you want to, but it’s my choice.”

“What mood is that?” He waved his hand at her as their food was being served.

“We’ll get to that in time. Aren’t the Jedi supposed to learn patience?”

“Does it matter now?” Anakin grabbed his glass and took a generous sip of wine. “Can we move on to what you wanted to discuss?”

“Fine.” She huffed. “As you might remember, I hinted at my tastes on the way here. I’ve taken the day to consider how best to describe it to you, considering what I learned about you last night.”

“What did you learn that could be so revealing?” He raised one eyebrow, and her head tilted towards his forearm. Towards the scar where his slave chip had been. He glanced and frowned. “Oh.”

“In the broadest terms, Anakin, I’m what’s called a dominant,” she said. “I derive pleasure from exerting control over a submissive partner. Commanding them. Causing them pain and pleasure in tandem. I had hoped to introduce you to such things, but I have no wish to cross a line and cause you true discomfort.”

“Then don’t,” he stiffened. “You don’t have to be smart to know how my life was and how your taste doesn’t fit mine. If that’s all you wanted to discuss, the answer is very simple.”

“I disagree.” She cut into her dinner and took a bite, never breaking eye contact with him.

“You usually do,” he retorted dryly and sipped his wine with a sigh.

“I think there’s a middle ground to be negotiated. A way for both of us to find some level of catharsis.”

“Why would I let you dominate me in any way? I already married you. I am already your father’s apprentice. You want to take the rest of the control I have over myself away?” He questioned, supporting his head on his hand and swirling the wine inside his glass. He was surprisingly calm and resigned.

“You would retain the ultimate control, Anakin. You would have the safeword. _Love.”_

“Oh, right,” he paused, “ _love_.” He said, setting the glass down.

“I’m offering you a trial run tonight. If it doesn’t suit you, I’ll turn to my handmaidens for such things when we return to Imperial Center, and we’ll never speak of it again.”

“Your handmaidens?” His eyes widened. “Right…” he said slowly and picked his glass again, drinking the rest of the wine. Setting it down he was served again and contemplated the offer. “I don’t know. I don’t trust you.”

“Is there anything I could do to make you trust me?” she asked, her tone making it clear that the question was a rhetorical one. “You’ve decided already that you hate me. You’ve been raised to do that, and our current arrangement makes it very easy for you to say it was justified.”

“Yet, you don’t seem to accept that.”

“I am trying to show you, Anakin, that life with me doesn’t have to be the martyrdom you’re making it out to be,” she huffed. “I’m not evil.”

He snorted. “Oh, you’re not evil? Well, you have to be something, because good isn’t it.”

“Typical Jedi, treating everything in terms of binary. It’s so easy that way, isn’t it? For everyone who is not with you to be your enemy?”

“No, that isn’t the way. We respect people’s views and while many Jedi believe that good and evil are the only two things to exist, I and many others are not like that. But so far, I haven’t seen anything about you that leads me to believe you’re anywhere in the middle and your _father_?”

“Father’s a Sith through and through, I don’t deny it. But I think you also know the lengths people go to survive. I’ve done what I had to, in order to live and to cope.”

Anakin sighed and leaned back in his chair, overlooking the lake. At least he had options, but while he wanted to say ‘no’ and get up and leave, he knew he couldn’t. “You could entertain yourself with tons of things, and you choose this… why haven’t you allowed your toys to impregnate you? Would have been easier.”

“It would have ended as I’ve told you. With me being chained to a bed and faced with a never-ending line of—”

“Yes, yes, I heard it,” he snapped. “You don’t have to repeat it. If you were willing to go against him, you could change the Galaxy, but you prefer to be afraid.”

“Have you ever been choked?” she asked, spinning the ring on her finger back and forth. “Have you ever had the air squeezed out of your lungs as you claw at your throat, desperate for breath with no way to make it end? Knowing that it’s happening by the hand of someone who should love you? Yes, Anakin, I am afraid, but that is because I have been _taught_ it, not because I choose it. I would have thought you would understand that, considering you once had something inside your body that could kill you at the whim of a master.”

After a long silence with him debating over what to say next, he realized it wasn’t worth the trouble to argue over the subject again. Some people just couldn’t be changed. “What do you want to do tonight?” Anakin asked, but he didn’t look at her. He looked at how the night was so clear. No clouds. The stars were bright above and he missed flying. He missed piloting his fighter and he just missed being free. Sighing, he sipped on his wine.

“The basics,” she replied. “Restraint, primarily. Perhaps a little spanking, but nothing that could leave a mark.”

He tightened his hand around the glass. “What else?”

“That would be it, for tonight at least.”

“Fine.”

“Unless you decide you want more.”

Anakin rolled his eyes. “I’ll leave for the bedroom now,” he set his glass down and stood up, his food untouched.

“As you wish.”

He entered the house and went upstairs to her bedroom door before he lost his courage and changed his mind. He was hoping to entertain her and have grounds to refuse doing more since she couldn’t point out that he hadn’t tried it. Opening the door, a chill went down his spine as he walked inside and sat on the bed, taking a deep breath, gathering up strength to face the next couple of hours.

It wasn’t long before he heard the light footfalls of Padmé, sweeping into the room as she reached for a hidden clasp on her waist. With one tug, the skirt fell away, revealing a decoration of black ribbons and lace covering her backside, and he got a very clear view of just how little it covered when she walked past him, into the bathroom that adjoined the bedroom. He heard the sound of water running, and her humming softly.

His muscles tensed at the promise of the moment and of course, his body obviously reacted to what she was wearing. The water stopped and she returned, removing the connected ring and bracelet and setting them on her vanity, next to the lubricant. “Strip, please,” she said, her voice smooth and authoritative. “I want your clothes off by the time I’m done getting what I need.”

Slowly, he removed his cape and boots and untied the laces of his pants, pushing them down and off of his legs, throwing them aside. _What am I doing? This is insane. I should not be giving into her._ He pulled the tunic over his head and it joined his pants on the floor. He was still tense and unsure and his eyes darted to the door more than once.

“Breathe, Angel,” she reminded him. “It’s nothing to be scared of.”

 _I’m breathing,_ he wanted to snap but kept quiet, a muscle in his jaw twitching as he sat back down on the covers. She turned back to him, a new jar and a familiar pair of binders in her hands.

“Hands up above your head,” she instructed.

“The binders? Really? Is that what you normally use with your toys?”

“No, but then, they can’t use the Force. If they could, I would have been married to one of them a long time ago. Now, are you going to make me ask again?” He just gave her an angry look before complying with her earlier request. 

She clasped the binders around his wrists, then opened the jar, dabbing its contents on her fingers. Just as she had the night before, she placed a hand on his chest, right above his heart. The ointment on her fingers made his skin tingle, and she spread it across his torso, occasionally tapping a finger to see his reaction. His hands flexed against the binders as the muscles over his chest and stomach would react in contact with the ointment and her touch making him bit his lower lip to keep sounds from coming out. 

“Oh, come now, Angel, no need to be shy.” She gripped his cock in both hands and gave it a slight squeeze. “Tell me what I do to you.” Anakin gasped at the contact, since her fingers still had the ointment and he had been unknowingly aching for her touch. He let out a loud moan as she squeezed him and he closed his eyes. Her fingers moved along his shaft like they were dancing, expertly teasing him towards his climax in a pace that shifted tempo without warning, moving between slow strokes and quick brushes. His breathing became ragged as he struggled against the binders, feeling himself closer to his orgasm as she worked him closer and closer to that edge.

“ _Kriff,”_ he moaned, muscles in his stomach tightening as he felt the tension in his lower stomach. She released her hold and stepped back. “W-What?” He opened his eyes to see what had made her pull back. He was so close to the delicious edge of release, he needed more to fall into it.

“Like I said,” she smiled, wiping her hands clean with the edge of the bedspread. “We are practicing restraint. You don’t get your release until I say so. And right now,” she paused, placing her hands on the headboard and climbing onto the bed so that she was directly over his head, “I say that I want you to fuck me with your mouth until I’ve had my release.” She pulled at the ribbon on her underwear and it practically unraveled, letting her pull it free and leaving the pink flesh of her sex directly in his line of sight.

Anakin was caught off guard. _She knows I never did this, right?_ The sight of her bare flesh before him almost made him spill even though her order was restraint. The scent was like nothing he had ever experienced before, but then… all of this, all this intimacy and these games were new to him and he found himself blushing at what she was asking him to do.

“You remember how I did it for you last night, don’t you?” she prompted, lowering herself to be mere inches from his face.

“Yes,” he replied hoarsely, and tentatively darted his tongue out to taste her. Her hips bucked slightly at the first touch, but then she settled, resting enough weight on his face that he could feel it, but not so much that it became hard to breathe.

“That’s it, Angel. Write your name inside me if you like,” she mused with a little sigh.

She tasted sweet and sour and he let his instinct take over as he began licking broad strips over her folds, and finding her clit, he sucked on the little bundle of nerves. He alternated. Swirled his tongue, sucking, small licks. He found himself wanting more, getting addicted to her taste, forgetting why he was in this situation in the first place.

He got his wish as she let out a cry, spilling into his mouth with a shudder. “Oh, _yes._ ” 

Licking his lips, he could feel himself painfully hard and whimpered underneath her. _I’m pathetic._ He moved against the binders, feeling them chafe against his skin, but he didn’t care. She remained still for a moment, letting him lap up at her folds, then rose and placed a hand at his waist. “Turn over.”

Hesitating for a moment, he sighed and obeyed, turning over to lie on his stomach, hissing as the sheet brushed against his erection. _I don’t know how to feel about this…_

“You really are stunningly beautiful, Anakin,” she whispered, tracing the contours of his back, moving lower and lower until her fingers were brushing against his backside and he tensed. “I can’t believe the Jedi would have deprived the galaxy of such a treasure.”

His response was a simple, strangled moan, muffled by the sheets as he pulled, again, at the binders, feeling it cut against his skin. He wasn’t used to this and his most primal instinct was to arch into her touch and plead for more, for her to let him come. But pleading to her went against his pride and he bit his lower lip as he waited for what came next remembering her words at dinner. _Restraint. Spanking._

“How do you feel, Angel?” she asked sweetly, one finger slipping down to prod at his balls. “Tell me what you want.” As if she didn’t already know.

“My release,” he muttered, muffled by the bed, gasping as she touched him. “Release,” Anakin repeated with a groan.

“I’ll give it to you if you answer a few questions first. And I suggest you answer them truthfully. Understood?”

“Yes.” _It doesn’t mean I will._

“I’ll start simple. Do you like what I do to you?”

“I don’t know yet.” _At least, this is the truth._

“We established you were a virgin. Until last night.” She pressed a kiss to the back of his neck. “Was it difficult? Living as a Jedi and knowing you were forbidden these pleasures?”

That was easy enough to answer since it was a widely known fact. “It was encouraged that we indulged in it. Just forbidden to get attached.”

“Sex without attachment is no real pleasure,” she scoffed, and her palm slapped against the left cheek of his ass. “And that was no real answer.”

He gasped at the sensation. “It’s the truth.”

“Oh, Angel, you have so much to learn still,” she sighed, rubbing the tender spot she’d just struck. “You broke their rules anyway, didn’t you? You’re quite attached to your friends.”

Anakin was not falling for that question. “We’re brothers and sisters in the Order.”

“If the Order had been what mattered, you would have listened to Obi-Wan and let me take him instead.” She gave him a matching strike on the right side. “You cared about their safety more than your Order’s silly little prophecies and missions.”

“At least I care about someone,” he said through gritted teeth as he fisted his hands and struggled against the binders.

“I like that you care,” she whispered in his ear, her fingers curling into his hair. “You can cum now, Angel.”

Anakin grunted and finally fell over the edge, unaware that those five little words would have so much effect. His body tensed, the climax ran through him and he relaxed, closing his eyes, leaning his head against his bicep. She unclasped the binders, gently kissing his wrists and rubbing them to restart the circulation. “There’s a bath already drawn if you want it.”

“I want to sleep,” he sighed, exhausted, feeling his eyelids already heavy.

“If that’s what you want. Sweet dreams.”

Anakin reached up to grab one of the pillows and buried his face in it, closing his eyes. His body was spent and he just hoped his mind would quiet too. In the periphery, he could vaguely see Padmé putting away the binders and the jar, and exchanging her corset for a loose robe of silver silk. The last thing he remembered before he passed out was her sitting beside him on the bed, her fingers working out the kinks in his shoulders and back with surprising tenderness.


	5. What It Takes to Break a Person

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BIG warning for this chapter, which contains a scene of premeditated abuse of a sexual partner. If this may trigger you, we advise you to skip the section that begins with "She wore black." and proceed directly to the one that starts with "The knocking on his door..."  
> You'll find a summary in the end notes about what went down in the skipped section.  
> Always remember, folks, BDSM should be safe, sane, and consensual!

Anakin felt the sun on his face and he groaned as he felt heavier than usual and in some places, sore. He opened his eyes, wincing as the sunlight hit them. Strange. His bedroom did not have this much light. Trying to move, he froze. He wasn’t alone  _ and  _ looking around, he realized this wasn’t his bedroom. Looking down at his chest, he saw a halo of silky brown curls and beneath them, Padmé, sleeping with her head over his heart, arm around his waist. If he didn’t know better, he would say they were a regular, lovesick couple that fell asleep after a round of hot sex the previous night and while the latter might be true, the former wasn’t. His backside stung as he moved against the sheet and his wrists had the binders marks carved into them and the red, angry lines stood out against his toned skin.

He shifted, trying not to wake her up. She looked almost angelic and innocent asleep, but he knew otherwise and he would prefer it if he could slip unnoticed. She moaned slightly and rolled to one side, making it easier for him to move. He left the bed, wincing, and looked around for his cape. His clothes could be brought to him later. Looking around, he found it on the ground and picked it up, wrapping it around his body. Opening the door, he glanced over his shoulder at her sleeping form before slipping out of the bedroom, closing the door quietly behind him and going down the hallway to his own bedroom.

“Sir, you’re alright?” Rex asked.

“Perfect, but I don’t want to be bothered,” he replied with a sigh, entering his room. 

“Shall I arrange for breakfast to be brought to you?”

“Not hungry, thank you,” he mumbled, closing the door behind him.

He was so torn on what to feel. On the one hand, last night felt good. He’d enjoyed eating her out and the sensations she provoked in him made him feel good. On the other hand, he felt cheap like he was selling himself, not being honest to who he was. He couldn’t choose between being pleased or feeling like a slut. 

Sighing he entered his fresher and took his cape off, starting the water for his shower. He took a bacta cream and put it on his wrists to cool down the burning sensation before stepping in. Leaning his head against the tiles, feeling the hot water run through his back and hissing as it washed over his ass, he would never admit out loud he had liked sleeping with her.

When he left the shower and dressed in some lighter clothes, he looked out his window. Varykino was beautiful. Completely different from the Imperial Center and everywhere else he had been. Being closed in his bedroom as not going to help his paranoia and sense of self-loathing for enjoying kinky sex. 

Opening the door, he startled Rex, who wasn’t used to having him leave before sunset. “Sir?”

“I’m going to wander around, get to know the estate a little better.”

“Alright, sir, but I’m just gonna give you a heads up, security’s gonna be a little tight.”

“Afraid I might run away?”

“No, sir. Afraid someone might try to abduct you. Or the Princess. Or both of you,” Rex deadpanned.

“They don’t have to worry about me, I’ll go willingly,” he quipped with a smirk. “She, however, bites. Might be venomous.” He lifted his shoulders. “They should let her go too.”

“Not really an option for us.” Rex sighed. “Just let us know if you’re planning on going to the beach or the island, securing that takes time.”

“There’s an island I can go to? An actual island? With  _ no one  _ in it?” Anakin asked, eyes widening.

“Well, uh, yes,” Rex said slowly. “Do you want to visit it?”

“Do I want to be alone and away from this estate? Yes.”

“I’ll get my squad started on securing it for you.”

“Good!” He grinned, patting Rex on the shoulder. “I would love that, thanks.”

“Of course, sir.”

* * *

Padmé awoke alone, her face pressed into the spot where Anakin had slept as the only evidence that he’d been there. One of the cleaning droids was moving around the room, collecting the discarded clothes from the night before while another droid presented her with her breakfast tray. She could only assume her husband had shut himself up in his room again. Disappointing, but not surprising.

She picked at the toast in front of her, trying to process everything that had happened the night before. He’d been more receptive to the aftercare this time than when she’d tried on the yacht. That could be a good sign. And she’d felt him respond to her touch, part of him had enjoyed what they’d done.

The personal commlink she’d brought with her sprang to life on her desk, displaying the image of her father, and she pulled her robe a little closer to her body. “Father, I could have been with my husband!”

“Yes, but from what I see, he’s nowhere to be found. Trouble in paradise already, dear daughter?”

“Of course not,” she said indignantly. “He’s just in the fresher.” A simple enough lie. A reasonable one. “Is there a reason for you calling?”

“I am making sure there is nothing wrong and that I am getting what I want.”

“We’ve barely been away two days, I can’t know if I’m pregnant yet.”

“But have you done something about the ridiculous innocence of the boy?”

“He’s been in my bed every night.” Technically the truth.

“You have two weeks and I will be expecting results when you return home.”

“Daddy, I’m doing everything I can to make him cooperate!” she protested. “He’s stubborn, and I’m not going to just take—”

“What you want by force?” He guessed. “I don’t see why not. You did say you wanted to break him, so I don’t understand why you’re not investing your  _ extensive  _ knowledge on making Anakin Skywalker break, so he can become what I need him to be.”

“I don’t want a bedmate who hates me!” she protested. “He was a  _ slave _ before the Jedi found him, did you know that? My usual methods aren’t going to work, this is a delicate situation. And he’s  _ mine _ before he’s yours.”

“Of course I knew he was a slave. That’s why I don’t understand your ridiculous morals. I can guarantee he has been through worse things than your games, my dear, and your defiance is unbecoming. You are a means to an end. You think he doesn’t already hate you?” He cackled. “Don’t be foolish, Padmé and do whatever you have to do. He’s stubborn? Make him regret being so.”

“Father—”

“I don’t want to hear excuses!” He snapped. “Excuses are not going to give me my heir. Excuses are a reason for punishment.”

“I will do my best,” she muttered, bowing her head with a sigh. “I am sorry, Father.”

He ended the communication without saying goodbye or anything else. Padmé leaned back against the bed frame, eyes closed as she tried not to cry. She could practically feel his grip around her neck. But she couldn’t do what he wanted. She didn’t want to believe Anakin truly hated her.

There had to be a way to endear herself to him. Their survival depended upon it. Taking a shuura fruit with her, she left the bedroom and approached his suite, knocking on the door. “Anakin?”

There was no answer. And despite her father’s orders, she wasn’t in the mood to push him this morning. So, she slunk back to her own room. “I want the lake secured,” she called to whatever clones might be listening. “I’m going swimming.” 

There was no response, but she didn’t doubt they’d heard her. After eating about half her breakfast, she changed into a two-piece silver bathing tog, grabbed a towel, and headed down to the beach at the base of the villa. There were already a few clones on the shore. “Glad to see you’re being efficient,” she said, dropping the towel on the sand and wading into the water. It felt deliciously cool against her skin, and she fell back into it, letting herself float wherever the currents or winds might take her. The birdsong overhead lulled her into a hazy sense of peace.

“Why are you here?” Anakin appeared suddenly from beneath the water, right behind her, frowning. She shrieked, spinning upright as he startled her. His eyes widened and for a moment, he almost looked amused.

“I thought you were in your room!” she cried indignantly.

“Clearly, I’m not.”

“Yes, Anakin, I have eyes. I can see that.”

He snorted at her snarkiness. “I thought I would explore the estate and Rex did tell me about the island. So I came here for some peace and quiet.”

“I won’t get in your way,” she retorted with a huff. “No matter how similar our lines of thinking might have been.”

“Oh, loosen up,” he splashed her. “Do you need to have a stick up your ass all the time?” Anakin splashed her again.

“I could ask you the same thing,” she retorted, diving under the water and kicking in his direction before resurfacing.

“You’re in a sour mood,” Anakin rolled his eyes.

“I was having a lovely time until you scared me half to death.”

“Only half? Pity.” Oh, how she  _ wished  _ he could have seen her conversation with her father.

“We’re in a lake. If you’re that desperate to get rid of me, drown me,” she challenged.

Anakin looked thoughtful as he began floating in the water on his back. “Tempting. Really tempting. I could kill you and I am strong enough in the Force to kill the clones or mind-trick them. Run away and return to the Rebellion, picking this war back up and taking down your monster of a father.”

“Then what’s stopping you?”

“I am actually a good person,” he said dryly. “Killing in cold blood is not for me.”

“You say that as if you think I’ve killed in cold blood.”

He shrugged. “Kriff if I know.”

“I haven’t, for the record. I’ve never killed anyone.”

“Only my freedom.” Anakin quipped.

“Oh, yes, clearly that makes me evil incarnate.”

Anakin laughed. “Wow, you’re really in a bad mood today. If you don’t understand why I am not particularly fond of you, I am not going to waste my breath explaining myself to you.”

“I know why you don’t like me. And I’m not exactly thrilled by our situation either, for the record.”

“Oh, that’s rich,” he huffed. “You forced me into this situation.  _ You  _ and  _ you  _ alone.”

“So it’s my fault that you and your friends killed Dooku and got caught.”

“No, I’m quite proud of having killed that son of a bitch,” Anakin said. “Getting caught was unfortunate. It’s your fault you made this ridiculous agreement. I would have rather agreed to be executed.”

“Wake up, Anakin.” She folded her arms. “I made the offer, but you were the one who took it. We  _ both _ made this choice, and I realize how easy it must be for you to put all the blame on me for this, but that is not the reality of our situation. We both did what we needed to in order to survive. I can assure you, if it were up to me, I would not have married a man whose deepest wish is to hate me.” She started back towards the shore, refusing to look back at him.

He swam after her, grabbing her arm before she could enter the sand. “Do you realize what you’re asking of me?” He asked, gripping her arm tightly.

“Trust,” she answered coolly, keeping eye contact. “Trust that what I am doing will keep both of us alive.”

“Not that, Padmé. A baby. A child. Despite us not being in love or anything close to that, it will be our child and you know what will happen to him? Or her?” Anakin sighed.

“Hope that  _ your _ father is looking out for you, then.” She knew the Chosen One legend, he was supposedly sired by the Force itself. That was the reason this was possible at all. 

“Sidious will do to this child something worse than what he did to you growing up. He won’t be loved. He’ll be taught to kill, slaughter, and be wrapped in the Dark Side from the very first day.” Anakin said icily. “My father has not really been looking out for me, has he? If you want to know why I despise you already it’s because you already showed me what you are willing to do to save your skin. Sacrifice your own blood and flesh. You’re no better than your father.”

“I am infinitely better than my father in ways you couldn’t possibly understand.”

“I’ve seen nothing to prove that so far.”

“The fact that I don’t have you permanently shackled to my bed with a collar around your neck, for one.”  _ Oh,  _ but as she said it, the mental image was devastatingly tempting. She pried his hand from her arm and stepped out of the water, the sun glistening on her wet skin and bathing tog as she stood over him. “I could have done it, you know.”

“Maybe you should use your toys from now on,” he stated, holding his ground even all he wanted to do was take a step back. “I might be infertile. I wish I was but he doesn’t know.”

“Hardly a lie that can stand up to scrutiny, but if you want to try and fool the most powerful Sith in the galaxy, be my guest.” She grabbed her towel and wrapped it around her waist. “I’ll see you tonight in the sitting room.”

“What if I don’t show up?” He yelled at her back.

“Then you can use the commlink in my bedroom to call my father and tell him how you want to be executed.”

“Maybe I’ll do that.” He hissed, crossing his arms over his chest,

He was making it very, very hard for her to resist her father’s commands right now. But maybe he was right.

Anakin had already decided she was a heartless monster. What reason did she have not to embrace it?

* * *

She wore black. Black and chains and leather, crossing her legs and her chest, molded to her body like a second skin. Black around her eyes, and staining her lips, and her nails. She’d been stewing in her anger all day, and it had burned. She was dressed in the ashes of her compassion now, and she was waiting for him.

There was a knock on the door before Anakin entered and stood rigid by the door. Her outfit was a far cry from the pieces she wore the previous two days, and in the back of his mind, he knew something was wrong, but he pushed it down because he attributed it to their fight by the lake.

“Hands on the fireplace mantle,” she growled. “And don’t say a word unless I tell you to.”

“You seem angry,” he ignored her order as his hands found the doorknob. “Maybe we can pick this up tomorrow when you’re not acting spoiled.”

“You are staying right where you are.” She was on him in a flash, grabbing the collar of his tunic with such force that it tore off him as she pushed him onto the couch. She didn’t let go of the fabric, pulling a strip of it free and wrapping it tightly around his eyes. “You are  _ mine. _ I don’t know  _ why _ I have to keep explaining that to  _ everyone! _ ”

“Padmé—” He started, feeling shocked that he was shamelessly turned on.

“I said you don’t speak unless I tell you! Do I need to gag you, Skywalker? You have enough shirt that I can easily manage it!” she snarled, pulling the knot of his blindfold tight. Anakin hissed and shook his head ‘no.’

“Good.” Her hands reached down and made short work of his remaining clothes. “Now stand up.” He did as he was told, standing on shaky legs. Her small hands found his waist, guiding him a few steps forward until he could feel the heat at the front of his body. “Stay put,” she commanded, taking his right arm and extending it all the way before wrapping a leather cuff around his wrist. As she repeated the process on his left arm, he tried to move his right arm but couldn’t. As he should have realized earlier, the past two days she had been going easy on him, but apparently, their fight had set her off and now he was reaping the consequences.

With both his arms fastened, Padmé moved a few steps back, inspecting him. “Spread your feet a little,” she said and he complied. “Stay like that,” she instructed, retrieving two items from the chest of sex toys she’d brought— a spreader bar and a silver net. Pausing, she wondered if she should have waited to blindfold him until this was done.

No. No, it was better this way. Let him wonder what she was up to for as long as possible. She bent down and fastened the cuffs of the spreader in place, then knelt between him and the fire.

“I wanted to be good to you, Angel,” she sighed, placing her head against his stomach and kissing the base of his cock while her fingers stroked at his balls. Anakin moaned, feeling completely exposed and for the first time, vulnerable. “I really did.” Before he could harden, she slipped the metal web around his member, locking it in place, and dragged her tongue down his shaft. She suckled at the tip for a brief moment, taking in the drops of precum that were all he could release. Anakin gasped as he felt it. He tried to buck his hips forward but he couldn’t move and he groaned. The cage wouldn’t let him get fully hard, and his wife had moved away.

She stood behind him, taking in her handiwork and clucked her tongue. “Tell me the truth,” she whispered, leaning in. “What do you feel? Not think.  _ Feel _ .”

“Stuck,” he whispered. “Blind.” Sighing, he gasped at the cage around his cock. “Nervous. What are you doing?”

She didn’t answer him, merely exhaled through her nose and retrieved the last piece for tonight. A black leather crop that she brought down on his back without warning. He let out a startled yelp.

“I didn’t say you could ask a question.” He groaned, head lolling to the side. “This is what you wanted, isn’t it?” she demanded, striking him again and again, her pace picking up with every lash. “This is what you think of me? Fine! This can be what it’s like every night, and you won’t have to worry about fucking me! I’ll just have someone collect the spend when I’ve decided you’ve suffered enough for one night!”

Anakin gasped, his strain on the binds tightening with each strike. “Padmé—”

“ _ SHUT UP! _ ” she screamed, and the crop hit him so hard that the skin of his back broke. Blood spattered across the marble floor, her face, her dress. He let out a groan of pain, but she didn’t stop.

This had stopped being about pleasure and in the confusion of his mind, he knew he had to do something, he just had to remember what. But with every strike, his mind went into shock and froze for a little while. Once he recovered, she would strike him again, and as the strikes were closer and closer, he felt his eyes sting behind the blindfold. She slowed, just for a moment, trying to catch her breath as her adrenaline began to subside, and it was enough time for him to remember.

“Love,” he whispered and it almost sounded inaudible to him.  _ Did I say it out loud or did I just think it?  _ The crop dropped to the ground, and Padmé let out a dry sob as the full weight of what she’d done actually set in. “Love,” he repeated. 

With trembling hands, she reached out and untied the blindfold, letting it fall to the ground in front of them as she knelt to release him from the spreader first. If she didn’t do that before his hands, he’d topple over. “I’m sorry,” she whispered hollowly as she set the bar aside and moved to unfasten his right hand. “I’m so sorry, I…” the words died on her lips. There was nothing she could say to make this right. When she unfastened the left, he fell to his knees, groaning, all of his back was aching and he actually trembled. She tore off the sheer fabric of the skirt, dabbing at the blood on his back. “I’ll have one of the clones bring a medikit.” Anakin just nodded as he sat down, looking at his hands and not uttering a word.

“Rex!” Padmé hurried out of the room. “Rex, I need a medikit. Or just bacta and bandages. And quickly.”

The Captain didn’t even question it as he turned around and rushed out of the hallway. His voice could be heart, shouting orders at his clones and he was back a few minutes later with a medikit. “Here, your highness. Should I get you anything else?”

Padmé hesitated. It might be better if Rex were the one to take care of Anakin, Force knew she was probably the last person Anakin wanted to see right now. But would his pride be wounded if anyone else saw him in this state? “No, that’ll be all,” she said finally. “Have the whole squadron on the perimeter of the estate. We need privacy.”

“Yes, your highness,” he bowed his head and turned around. Padmé returned to the sitting room and knelt beside Anakin, soaking the bandages in the bacta before she wrapped them around his chest. He hissed as it made contact.

“I’m sorry,” she repeated. “You were right. I’m so sorry. This won’t happen again. I swear it won’t.” Though her word probably meant bantha poodoo to him.

Anakin nodded, his senses a bit shaken. “Give me the bacta cream,” he mumbled. “For my wrists,” he said. She passed over the jar without a word and kept working at his back. He rubbed the cream on his wrists silently, sighing as the sting of the leather was soothed. As she finished with his back, she moved to the red marks at his ankles.

“Is the cage,” she paused. “Do you need help taking it off?”

“I don’t know how to, so, yeah,” he replied mechanically, still rubbing the cream on his skin. She moved awkwardly in front of him, handling his member as little as possible while she opened the cage and pulled it off him.

“Are you strong enough to walk on your own?”

Her husband sighed, biting his lower lip and shaking his head. “Give me a few more minutes. Where do you want me to go?”

“I was thinking you’d want to go back to your room,” she whispered. “I won’t touch you again unless you ask it of me.”

Anakin glanced at her dubiously. That was a dangerous promise to make. “Your bedroom is closer.”

“No one will see you, they’re all on the estate perimeter right now.”

“It’s not like they don’t know,” he said emptily and reached for a blanket on the couch, pulling it to cover himself. “It’s whatever you decide. You’re the dominant, after all,” he said.

“I wasn’t tonight,” she said, looking away. “I did everything wrong.”

Yes, he’d noticed. Anakin wrapped the blanket around his shoulders, careful with his back. She didn’t move, just kept staring into the fire in front of them. “What happened?” He asked.

“You hated me anyway,” she whispered. “I wanted to feel like there was a reason for it.”

He sighed and stood up, cringing at the pain on his back. “I’m going to bed. I’ll see you tomorrow,” he whispered, turned his back on her and went towards the door. She didn’t respond and he left, closing the door softly behind him.

* * *

The knocking on his door continued even when he ignored it the first time. He didn’t feel like moving, lying on his stomach in bed thanks to last night’s punishment, and honestly, his mind has been reeling since then.

“I don’t want to eat, Rex,” he finally grumbled.

“I’m not Rex,” his wife’s voice came through the wood, sounding unusually fragile. “I wanted to check on you. See if your bandages needed changing.”

“Come in,” he said, but didn’t move. He hugged the pillow underneath him a little tighter as he sighed. The door creaked open and Padmé slipped into the room, hovering at the edge of his sightline in a high-waisted white nightgown. “What?” He asked dryly.

“Do you need any medical care?” she prompted again.

“I don’t know, I can’t exactly see my back,” he answered. “I thought it was what you were going to check?”

“How does it feel?”

“Sore.” He shrugged. “Don’t worry, I’ve had worse.”

“That doesn’t make me feel better.”

“Padmé, I… I don’t know how to do that. Or if I want to. I’m using the Force to heal myself slowly, so I’ll be alright and you don’t have to hover. It’s not like we’re a real couple, you don’t have to be a dutiful wife,” he said calmly.

“This has nothing to do with that. I hurt you. And it was wrong. I’m trying to apologize.”

"You apologized last night. It's alright. You're forgiven," Anakin replied. 

“So easily?” she asked dubiously.

"I understand a thing or two about losing control." He confessed. "You apologized. You were honestly regretful and caring when you realized I said the safeword. I wish I could tell you off but… Yeah. Honestly, I was turned on before it all went downhill."

A pink flush spread across her cheeks. “You’re only saying that to make me feel better.”

"I'm really not and you're sort of getting me addicted to climaxing." He shrugged. "I don't have to like you to enjoy sex."

“There’s a meadow nearby,” she said, completely changing the subject. “I wanted to visit it and eat my lunch there. You can come with me if you want to. It’s just lunch, nothing else.”

Anakin thought for a moment. "I guess."

“Good. Then I’ll have Rex get you in a few hours, once everything’s ready.” She left without another word.

* * *

The Force healing had helped the skin on his back and he could stand straight a few hours later without an issue. Anakin sighed knowing he should have used what happened last night as an incentive to further prove his point that she wasn't good, that she was just like Sidious, but the aftercare made a difference. He was sure that his new Master wouldn't care how hurt he would be after a training session, or if he was bleeding. Padmé’s genuine worry and concern had surprised him and it wasn't the first time she had shown them. 

"Sir?" 

"Yeah, I'm ready," Anakin stated, leaving the room. 

"Do you feel better?" Rex asked carefully. 

"Yes." He paused. "It was just an accident."

The Captain nodded and didn't comment as he took him to meet his wife. He remembers Padmé vowing last night about not touching him until he asked it again and he could use that. He could use those words to get out of their nights. He could use this accident against her for as long as he wanted. Yet… he  _ had  _ enjoyed sex with her and he was enjoying last night's play until it got out of control. 

And he knew a thing or two about losing control. He was tempted to give her another chance. The pain had hid most of his desire but he had stayed sexually frustrated and he now knew it wasn't a nice feeling. 

Padmé was waiting on the veranda with two more clone troopers and a basket in her arms. Wearing a blue sheath dress with translucent three-quarter sleeves and her hair in a simple plait down her back, she looked like a completely different person. Innocent. Kind. Even a little frightened. “We can take a speeder or walk, whichever is easier for you,” she said softly, avoiding eye contact.

“Better to take the speeder, Princess,” Rex interjected. “We need to be able to make a quick getaway if your safety is threatened.”

“Yes, of course, you’re right, Captain,” she murmured distractedly.

"We'll walk. You worry too much, Rex," Anakin said. "You know the way better than I." He extended his hand. "Let me take the basket." She passed it over to him, careful not to let their hands touch as she did so, then lifted the hem of her dress and started walking quietly ahead of him. The troopers stayed close to her, hands on their blasters.

"I think I can protect my own wife. Give us some privacy. And breathing room."

“It’s protocol,” one of the other troopers protested. “Emperor’s orders.”

"The Emperor isn't here," Anakin snapped. "Rex, give us room.  _ Please. _ "

“Ease off a little, Echo,” Rex ordered gently. “The Prince doesn’t want us breathing down their necks, it’s not that big a problem.”

“But he doesn’t have any kind of weapon,” the third trooper argued and before he could finish his sentence, he felt a Force levitating him from the ground and squeezing, as a warning. 

Padmé flinched. “Anakin, let him down,” she requested. “Please. You’ve made your point.”

Anakin lowered the clone down and raised one eyebrow. "Still think I have no weapon?" 

“You’ll have to excuse Fives and Echo, sir, they’re still new to this,” Rex apologized as the two other troopers gave them a wide berth. Padmé rubbed at her neck distractedly as they kept walking.

After a few moments of silence, he sighed. "What is it?"

“Nothing. My neck hurts a little. I think I slept at an odd angle.” The lie was so weak he almost didn’t need the Force to know that it was one.

"Why don't I believe you?" 

“I don’t know, Anakin, but that’s the answer I have to give.”

"Did you sleep at all?" 

“Yes. I slept.”

"Then why does your neck hurt?" He pressured. 

“I told you already, it was at an odd angle. That happens sometimes,” she said stubbornly as they reached the crest of the hill. “We’re here.” The meadow was breathtaking, surrounded by waterfalls, filled with countless brightly-colored flowers, and the endless expanses of the sky stretching out before them.

"I triggered you, didn't I?" Anakin frowned. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, now come on. And watch your step, this hill can be tricky if you’re not careful.” She started stepping down carefully, one arm stretched out to maintain her balance, briefly glancing back over her shoulder at him. “Or do you want to go back?”

“No, I’m good,” he replied, following her carefully.

“Good.” She made it to the bottom of the hill and headed a little deeper into the meadow, deciding on a place to stop. “The blanket is in the basket,” she informed him bluntly.

He opened the basket to remove the blanket and handed it to her. “Here. I’m sorry, by the way, I remember you telling me about the choking. I wasn’t choking Fives, by the way, it was a simple lift.”

“I’m aware of what it was,” she replied icily, unfolding the blanket and spreading it out on the ground before sitting on it very carefully. “But it was still excessive. He was just trying to do his job.”

“I’ll apologize when I return. Better?” He asked, sitting by her side, 

“Yes,” she said, reaching into the basket and taking out a container of pastries. She removed the lid and selected a cake, passing the rest of them over to him without another word.

Anakin took a cake for himself and set the container aside, eating while enjoying the beautiful meadow around them. “I’m alright,” he said. “You don’t have to worry about yesterday.”

“I spoke to my father,” she blurted out, gripping the cake in her hands so tightly that it began to crumble. “Yesterday, before we had our encounter in the lake. He reminded me of what he expects from us.”

“Ah.” Now everything made sense. “That’s why you were so upset. Now I understand. You could have told me.”

“It wouldn’t have made any difference,” Padmé argued. “You wouldn’t stop hating me for putting you in this position. And I wouldn’t have stopped trying to get you to impregnate me.”

Anakin released a long breath and ate another cake, chewing and letting silence reign before he spoke again. “I don’t hate you,” he admitted sourly.

“You should.”

“Yeah. Maybe. You did force my hand in marriage by blackmailing me with my friends’ lives. But… you’re a victim as well.” Anakin pointed out.

“I’m his daughter.” She said it like that invalidated what he’d said. “This is all I have to offer the Empire, I  _ have _ to do this.”

“Padmé, I lived the past month under the same roof as you two and the man has no love for anyone but himself. You’re not his daughter. You’re a means to an end and you know this, it’s why you snapped last night. It bothers me that a woman who could be so smart and do so much prefers to grovel for her father’s approval than to make something of herself,” he said earnestly. 

“How could I do so much?” she accused bitterly. “If we came back to Imperial Center to find out he’d dropped dead of an illness, I wouldn’t be able to be Empress. I wouldn’t know how, he raised me with the expectation that my husband or my child would be his successor. And I don’t even think of a child as  _ mine _ , it’s just this faceless pink blob that I know I owe him.”

“I am not having a baby with you while you keep thinking of a child like that,” Anakin snorted. “Padmé, you’re his daughter. You are no fool. You’re not stupid. You could be a great leader if you wanted, you certainly have the skill,” he smirked. “For one thing, I am not succeeding anyone, because I am not that type of man and second, if by some misfortune, we do have a child, I will kill him before he gets to touch the baby and if you stand in my way to defend  _ my  _ heir, you’ll go down too,” his blue eyes turned cold as the ice of Hoth. 

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t just hear you threaten to commit treason,” she warned, getting to her feet with some difficulty. “And I’m going to go back to the villa. You won’t have to worry about the possibility of us conceiving for the rest of this trip. Consider our arrangement off.”

“Padmé,” he called warningly, grabbing her arm and tugging. “Don’t be a child. We’re having, for the first time, I might add, an honest conversation. Stay and speak with me. Be a Force-damn adult, for crying out loud, stop hiding behind your elaborate hair and dresses. You are more than that.”

“Speak with you about what?” she accused, trying to pull away. “You just said you don’t know anything about politics, so it’s not like you can teach me. And I’m certainly not going to learn from my father, it’s not what he wants from me.”

“He wants you to remain an idiot because it suits him. It suits his cause. I wish you would be brave enough to stand up to him and there are more ways to do that than to rub in his face what you do in the bedroom. Be cunning. Be smart. Is it so hard for you to believe that you are more than a baby machine?” Anakin scoffed, keeping his grip on her arm. “I will not take back what I said, Padmé. If I do have a child, I hope I am sound of mind to protect him or her, from whoever it is. You or your father. I know you don’t understand a lot about  _ actually loving  _ your children, but that’s what parents do. They protect their children. They give them their best shot.”

“And if I don’t do this, then my mother died for nothing,” she said bluntly.

“Really think about your mother.  _ Think _ . Do you believe she would have wanted her daughter to suffer like this? Or to have a grandchild submitted to that man’s will?” Anakin asked, baffled.

“Ugh, you sound exactly like Sola!” Padmé continued trying to wrest her arm free from his grip. “I didn’t want to be preached to by my half-sister, and I don’t want to hear it from you either! Especially because we both know this doesn’t come from you caring about me! You’re just waiting for the right opportunity to get away from me!”

Anakin released her with a growl. “It would be easier to hate you. I’m stupid to believe there’s a sliver of a decent human being inside of you,” he rose to his feet as well. “I am trying to get you to see the truth, two is better than one and like you said, we’re stuck with each other now. But I can’t… I can’t feel anything but resentment for you while I know you’re never going to change. That you are  _ not  _ willing to change, not even when you’re not alone anymore.”

“Live with him a little longer,” she hissed as she turned her back to him. “Then you’ll understand why there’s no point in trying.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Skippable section summary: In the den with the fireplace, Padmé restrained Anakin and teased him a little bit before beating him to the point of bleeding with a riding crop in a frenzy of anger. He used the safeword, "love," which snapped her out of it. She released him and performed a level of aftercare before leaving him alone, ashamed of her actions.


	6. Hard Learned Lessons

Padmé had not seen her husband since the disastrous excuse for a picnic. That was four days ago. She’d shut herself up in her room, opening the door only to receive the meals the clones delivered. Despite Anakin being only one room over, she could not bring herself to talk to him. And it was starting to drive her mad.

Thankfully, her father had not called again. If he had, she had no doubt that he would have sent an entire battalion to collect her and Anakin and lock them both up. “I’m  _ not _ a victim,” she muttered, slamming a fist onto her pillow. “I’m not.” She was a daughter doing her duty, she owed it to her father, to the Empire. 

A muffled moan caught her attention, and she sat up, looking for the source of it. She heard it again and it definitely hadn’t come from anywhere in her bedroom. Standing up, she slowly walked towards her fresher, listening to the sound grew louder. And with the way the villa was structured, she could only surmise that her husband was masturbating on the other side of the wall.

The image filled her mind, his near-perfect body stretched out before her, the long hard length of his cock as it swelled up with desire, but the illusion shattered as she remembered that he hated her.

“ _ Padmé, _ ” he moaned again, this time louder, and it stirred a heat in her womb.

She’d promised him she wouldn’t touch him again, but maybe it had been long enough that a hate-fuck wouldn’t be out of the question? She was going to have to act fast if she wanted even that much—

“ _ Force, fuck, _ ” she heard him gasp, and it made something inside her snap. As if on autopilot, she moved from her room directly to his, not even bothering to knock before entering. She smelled soap and bath oil and his spend. How many times had he spilled already?

“The walls are very thin, you know,” she said, stopping in the doorway of the fresher.

He wasn’t startled, but he blinked at her in the haze of his last climax. He laid in the bathtub, hair wet and curly, lips parted and sculpted chest gleaming as his hand was wrapped around his cock. “I do now,” he said hoarsely before glancing between his cock and her. “No knocking?”

“No knocking,” she confirmed. Through the gauzy red fabric of her nightgown, her nipples had hardened to a point, and she had very little doubt that he could see the curls of dark hair that led down to her sex as well. “Are you finished?”

He blinked at her again, innocently, and nodded, his hand dropping into the water. “Yes.”

“I might return the favor. Consider yourself warned,” she replied lazily.

“Padmé?” He leaned against the edge of the bathtub, staring at her with big blue eyes.

“Anakin.” She folded her arms just below her bust.

“How badly do you want to punish me for coming without your permission?” He asked, raising one defiant eyebrow.

“We’re not doing a scene, Anakin, what you do on your own time is none of my business,” she said neutrally, even though she would have loved to turn his backside pink for it.

With a sigh, he rose from the tub, splashing water everywhere as he set his feet on the ground, standing before her in all his naked glory, his cock half-hard. “You can’t say I didn’t ask,” he quipped, reaching for a towel.

She moved into his path, pulling the towel from the rack before he could. “If you want me to fuck you, Anakin Skywalker, say yes. And I will.”

He towered over her by nearly a foot and pursed his lips, not breaking eye contact for the next couple of minutes. “Yes.” He said. “No riding crop, though. That’s something I will never be able to see you use again.”

“No riding crop,” she agreed, twisting the towel. “But I suggest you get back in that tub.”

He raised his eyebrows. “The water is cooling.”

“We’ll warm it up.” Chuckling, he stepped back inside the water, sitting down, his arms resting on the edges. “Help me take this off.” Padmé moved closer and lifted her curls so that he could untie the nightgown. Reaching up, he undid the lace ties with slow care. Her breasts sprang free as the fabric slipped down easily and he looked at her hungrily as she leaned down to kiss him, grabbing one of his hands and pressing it against her chest. Anakin moaned into her mouth as he massaged her breast, kneading the flesh as his tongue explored her mouth willingly. She slipped into the tub, rubbing her sex against his as she traced patterns down his chest and waist. Anakin groaned, deepening the kiss as he bucked his hips upwards, into her, his cock hard again, as his available hand found her other breast and he squeezed it, hard.

Padmé let out a high pitched whimper, lifting her hips up and plunging them back down, managing to take him into her all at once. It was almost frightening, as if the two of them had been made to fit together. Anakin gasped, breaking the kiss as he felt her all around him, deliciously tight and his hands left her breast, to hold her ass. “ _ Fuck. _ ”

“That’s the idea,” she giggled, rubbing her face against his neck.

He thrust into her, hard, as his head fell between her breasts, his hips coming up to meet hers in rapid and hard movements. His tongue darted out, wanting to taste her skin. He wanted to taste everything, she was like a drug, and ever since that first time, he had been helpless.

“Make me cum,” she whispered in his ear, curling her arms around him. “You know how, Angel.”

Anakin groaned as he pounded into her, head rising to kiss the curve of her neck, before he bit her pulse point, sucking as his fingers dug into her skin, making her meet his every thrust. She came with a cry of pleasure, but also surprise. “You’ve been busy,” she gasped, slumping against him a little. 

Thrusting into her a few more times until he came with a cry himself, spilling inside of her, he kept nipping at her neck and licking the spot where he had just sunk his teeth, he shrugged, as his hold lessened. “A lot of free time on my hands,” he whispered into her neck, breathlessly.

“Maybe I should leave you alone more often,” Padmé whispered.

“Or you can teach me,” he nuzzled her neck, sighing while raising his head and putting his lips to her ear. “I want to eat you out again and I want you to ride me while my hands are tied. I want your mouth on me again and I want to watch myself disappear into you… your mouth, your cunt, I want the release only you can give me.”

“Sweet Angel,” she sighed, cuddling close to him.

“That’s all you have to say?” He whined.

“The waiting makes the reward all the sweeter, pet,” Padmé giggled, running her hand down to his ass and squeezing it very tightly.

Anakin moaned and brushed his tongue over her nipple. “I want this. If I’m denied everything else, at least I want pleasure.”

“You’ll have it,” she promised, pulling back as her face turned serious. “There isn’t much time left before we have to go back. But I will take care of you as best I can, Anakin. I promise.”

He nodded. “We can use the time we have left to make up for the time we lost,” he shrugged. “I’m willing to throw out our arrangement.”

“Throw it out?” she echoed slowly.

“I’m  _ yours _ , for the rest of the hours we have left in Varykino. I think we both learned our limits and can work with them.”

“And when we get back?” she whispered.

“You’ll have to make sure I’m not completely lost after your father’s done with me,” his whisper was so low that if they weren’t pressed together, she wouldn’t have heard him.

“I promise.”

Nodding, he smiled. “Now… what’s next? I suppose you had all of our nights planned before?”

“Shhh.” She placed a finger to his lips. He looked up at her, blue eyes wide. “We’ll get to that in time. Just enjoy this moment right now.”

Anakin agreed and leaned up to press his lips against hers in a soft kiss, arms wrapping around her and pulling her close to his chest.

* * *

“Comfortable?” Padmé pressed her lips to the center of Anakin’s back.

“Yes,” he replied in a breathless moan. 

“And can you see anything?” She tapped at the blindfold.

“No,” he answered.

“Good, good, Angel. And you remember the safe word?”

“Love.” Hearing it made her wince again. “Padmé?”

“We’re starting now,” she said bluntly. “You don’t call me by name.”

“Yes, my lady.”

“Good pet.” She reached around and gave his cock a squeeze. Anakin moaned, trying to rock his hips forward for more friction, but she let go before he could achieve it. “Now, let’s start simple. Where did you come from, Angel, before the Jedi claimed you?”

"Tatooine," he breathed in anticipation.

“Do you ever miss it?” Her fingers slipped lower, cupping his balls and playing with their weight. 

"N-No," he hissed. "Maybe. Sometimes. It depends," he groaned as she kept touching and cupping him, his thoughts a mess. Her hand came down on both cheeks of his ass, the sharp sting leaving a pink imprint on his skin.

“Does that clear your thoughts at all?” She whispered in his ear. 

Anakin gasped. "I miss my Mom." He blurted out and blushed. What a thing to say while you were blindfolded, tied up, and getting spanked for pleasure. He leaned his forehead against the sheet and groaned quietly.

“Oh, you sweet thing.” She kissed his neck and scratched at his back lightly. “When did they take you from her?”

"I was nine. I chose it. She let me go so I could be free," he whispered, shifting uncomfortably. 

“They left her behind?” Padmé stopped touching him, noticing his unease.

He paused. "Yes."

“I’m sorry.” She hugged him from behind, her face buried in his skin. He just sighed. After a moment, she let go and pulled away. As she looked at him, an unfamiliar knot formed in her stomach.

“What do you want most at this moment?” she finally asked.

_ What kind of question was that?  _ "Release."

“And why should I give it to you?” Her voice became steadier and more commanding as she got her emotions back under control.

"I… I don't know." She slapped his backside again.

“Think of a reason. Any reason.”

He hissed. “You want to? Give it to me?”

“Not good enough.” Another strike, followed by a squeeze of his cock. “Try again.”

Anakin moaned as he rubbed his head against the sheet, looking for what he could say. “I’m your husband?” He said, muffled by the sheet.

“You are,” she agreed, hitting one cheek and then the other in quick succession. “But that’s still not what I want to hear.”

“Because I’m  _ yours, _ ” he cried out. Padmé placed both hands on his waist, pulling him up until his swollen cock was hanging freely, and slipped into the now open space on the bed, lying in a way that positioned her head directly beneath him.

“Then cum for me, Angel,” she commanded. He did it with a loud cry of her name, his bucking as he rode his climax, groaning as the sensations overwhelmed his senses. His seed spilled across her face and her bare chest, and she laughed, propping herself up to kiss the tip of his shaft. “Well done. Do you want to fuck me now?”

“Yes, please,” he said breathlessly. With a little chuckle, she got up from the bed and removed the cuffs from his wrists, followed by the blindfold.

“I decided to give you a treat and let you get to be on top for a change,” she said, giving him a sinfully beautiful smile.

“Finally,” he breathed, giving her a wicked grin of his own as he tugged her down to the bed and crashed his lips to hers, hands exploring down her body, gripping her ass and grinding his hips against her, moaning as he felt the contact with her womanhood.

“Oh!” Her eyes widened at how aggressive his movements were, and how much she liked it. “You’re eager,” she whispered against his lips.

“Hmhmm,” he hummed distractedly, lavishing her neck with open-mouthed kisses, descending her body until his head was between her legs and he gave her a soft, teasing kiss, the tip of his tongue teasing her clit.

“Anakin!” she whimpered, rocking her hips back and forth as the pressure of her orgasm built. Using his tongue, he licked and teased her clit, up and down, all around the sensitive flesh, while applying pressure to her entrance. She tasted divine, and he wrapped his arms around her thighs, pulling her womanhood closer to his mouth as he lapped at her. She came with a shudder, her hands curling against the sheets as her head tipped back and she exhaled in wordless pleasure. As he tasted her climax, he didn’t slow down but made a pleasurable sound as he had more of her. Moving one hand to her flesh, he inserted one digit into her warm and tight heat, sucking harshly on that sensitive bundle of nerves that made her come undone, curling his finger inside her.

“This wasn’t,” she gasped, wriggling against him, “what I had in mind.”

He stopped, blue eyes peering at her from between her legs. “I was getting there,” he said innocently. “You want me to stop, my lady?” He pecked her sensitive flesh as he finished the question.

“ _ Never _ .” Smirking, his finger started moving again and he inserted another digit inside of her, mouth over her clit, alternating between licking and sucking, moaning as he tasted her. Padmé bit down on her lip, drawing blood as she clenched her muscles in an attempt to hold back her release. Realizing her train of thought, he intensified the pressure on her clit and thrust his fingers in and out of her rapidly, curling them inside her heat, over and over again. She glared down at him, remaining stubborn. “ _ Fuck me, _ ” she managed to hiss.

Anakin curled his fingers inside of her again. “Come again,” he whispered, using the tip of his tongue to tease her sensitive flesh. “You know you want to,” he added, thrusting his fingers inside of her again.

_ Not as much as I want your cock inside me when I do it _ , she thought, and he heard her clearly.

_ Promise I’ll make you come again when I’m inside of you,  _ he replied. Two could play at mind-whispers. Squeezing her eyes shut, she obeyed him, spilling onto his fingers and tongue with a sigh of pleasure and defeat. Moving surprisingly quickly as she rode her climax, he sheathed himself inside of her with a shameless loud groan, crashing his mouth, covered in her juices, to hers.  _ Is this what you wanted?  _ He thrust himself deep inside her.

“Anakin!” She shrieked his name, writhing against him as the throes of pleasure washed over her. “Oh, _ Force…” _

He pounded into her, mercilessly, groaning in her neck as his own climax built in his lower stomach and threatened to consume him. “ _ Fuck, yes, _ ” he moaned, hips moving against hers in rapid succession. She’d barely had time to recover from her last orgasm, and yet another one was already building, coming so quickly that she tore the sheets and let out an almost inhuman shriek as it hit her. Anakin came right after her with a shout of pleasure, hips stilling, their bodies still linked.

“That was…” he started, breathless, a thin layer of sweat covering his body.

“The best sex of my life?” she finished with a grin, running her fingers through his hair.

“Not that I’ve had many, so far,” he smirked. “But yeah, I want to see how we top that,” he kissed her shoulder, pulling out of her as he grew soft.

“Well, we won’t be able to do this as frequently when we’re back in Imperial Center,” she reminded him with a sigh.

He rolled to lay on his back, still learning how to normally breathe again. “I thought  _ he  _ would be very keen on the baby-making sessions.”

“Maybe so, but he'll want to address the fact that he hasn’t made you a proper Sith yet,” she pointed out. “Your eyes are still that beautiful blue.”

“Hmm, maybe I’ll pass the color down to our child and adopt the yellow your father wants me to have,” he mused tiredly. “We’ll talk about how our life sucks when we get there. Now, come here,” he coaxed. She cuddled closer, resting her head on his chest with a sigh.

"Sleep," he whispered, kissing the top of her head. "We'll be heading back soon."

_ Then the true nightmare will begin.  _

* * *

They hadn’t been back in the Imperial Palace for more than a few hours, but Padmé had fallen back into old habits with ease, retreating to the family wing and her handmaidens. They had primped her and dressed her and made some inquiries about how the honeymoon had gone, but it was a performance at best. They knew better than to ask her anything in earnest before she had spoken with her father.

He was training Anakin at this moment, and that left Padmé to wander the halls of the palace. It might have been her own morbid sense of humor, but she had found herself at the locked doors of her father’s harem, staring at the carved wood and the clones on guard duty with a vague intensity.

He’d assembled the harem the day after the festivities for his coronation and the formation of the Empire had ended. Padmé had been fourteen years old, watching from a balcony as the women practically flooded into the palace, with the growing feeling that he had probably been keeping these mistresses in the shadows ever since her mother died nine years earlier. And she hadn’t blamed him. Her mother had failed, she'd told herself, and it was her father’s right to secure their dynasty by whatever means he saw fit.

Not that it had actually mattered. Since that day, she’d watched countless new women enter the harem while the old ones were carried out on stretchers, dead from their efforts and their failure. No woman since her mother had ever borne the Emperor a living child, let alone the Force-sensitive son and heir he so desperately craved. And so it fell to Padmé to see his goals through.

She remembered a time during his Chancellorship when he’d taken her with him on a state visit to Naboo. In Theed Royal Palace, she had watched the Queen, mesmerized, and asked him if she might have her own throne one day. In all the years since that day, his answer had remained burned into her soul. “ _ You were made to bed and birth greatness, my child. Your husband and sons will have thrones through you.” _

She’d certainly done the former with her marriage to Anakin, but it was the latter that would be discussed when she was summoned. Of that, she had no doubt. Even if a medical droid wouldn’t be able to sense a pregnancy this early, her father would be, thanks to the Force.

A month ago, the only thoughts surrounding a possible pregnancy in her mind would have been pride at the prospect of delivering what her father wanted from her and the thought of how carrying a child would impact her sex life. But since the picnic with Anakin, she was slightly more hesitant. She closed her eyes, shaking the thought from her mind. Anakin only thought that way because he hadn’t accepted his place yet. In time, he’d understand.

She heard footsteps and raised her eyes to see two of her father’s crimson-cloaked guards approaching her. They didn’t have to tell her why she was there, she simply followed them to the throne room. She could smell sweat and lightning as she stepped in, and it made her jaw clench a little. What had he done to Anakin? “Father?” she called hesitantly. “You wanted to see me?”

"I'm here," came his cold voice. Kneeling in front of him, with a layer of sweat covering his body and his clothes half torn, was Anakin. "I was teaching your husband what happens when he doesn't bend to the Dark Side's will."

“Isn’t that excessive?” she asked, moving to Anakin’s side and hovering slightly, unsure of whether or not to touch him. “Surely he doesn’t need to learn everything in one day?”

"While he remains attached to Kenobi's teachings, he will be punished thoroughly," he hissed. "You're failing me, daughter, I thought you were meant to break him. I gave you ten days to do so, yet you are neither expecting my heir nor handling your husband's unruly behavior."

“These things can take time,” she retorted defiantly. “And we can hardly conceive if you treat him like this. I don’t want this happening again.”

"You dare speak to me like that?" He turned his yellow eyes on her, defiance was not a quality he loved in his daughter. 

"Padmé, I'm fine," Anakin spoke for the first time as he stood up, legs shaking. "It's fine." He kept his wince hidden, as he was determined not to let Sidious see him waver. 

“Go back to our rooms,” she told him firmly, ignoring his protests. “Ask the handmaidens to look you over, and I’ll be there soon.”

He turned to look at her, blue eyes troubled. "It's not worth it. Come with me," he whispered. 

“That is not how this works,” Sidious hissed. “Both of you answer to me.” Padmé gasped as the familiar sensation of the Force wrapped around her throat, lifting up her up in the air as she clutched at her neck.

“Papa,” she managed to whimper. “Please.”

The sensation was abruptly stopped and she fell into the arms of her husband, who glared at Sidious. "If you want an  _ heir,  _ you need us  _ alive  _ and  _ well _ ." He scowled. "She's my wife, you don't treat her like that either. It's too soon to tell if she is carrying. I could have gotten her pregnant yesterday, for all you know, you could make her miscarry."

“Then let this be a lesson to both of you,” the Emperor warned. “And a reminder that I will not tolerate failure for long. Get out of my sight.”

"Let's go," he mumbled, taking her arm. His muscles still complained from an afternoon of Sith lightning but watching Sidious attack Padmé had made a protective side of him come to the front and control his actions. Outside the throne room, he sighed. "You're okay? I stopped him, but…"

“It’s nothing I haven’t dealt with before,” she said, her voice unnaturally calm as she reached up to brush back his hair. “I’m more concerned about you. Are you alright?”

"No. But then again, I have to be. He'll just do the same tomorrow." He winced. "My body is still in shock."

“I’ll help you with that once we’ve reached our apartments,” she promised, touching his shoulder gently. “Aftercare can work for things besides sex.”

He nodded, slowly accepting this would be the rest of his days. "I'll accept it."

They walked in silence for a while, until she spoke again. “It gets easier. Eventually.”

"It will never be easier and every time I think you want to submit a child to this…" he held his breath. "I don't want to fight. I'm tired of fighting about this. Your opinion won't change as mine won't either."

“We’re certainly not going to do anything about that situation for the time being,” she agreed grimly, then stopped and looked at him as they reached the door of the apartments. “Unless it turns out you were right about getting me pregnant yesterday. Hope that you’re not.”

"For someone who was eager to get pregnant during our honeymoon, that's a very drastic change."

“It has nothing to do with having a baby. I just don’t have any interest in what my father will do to you for trying to assassinate him,” she retorted, opening the door and signaling to her handmaidens. “I need a medikit, ointments, hot towels, and privacy.”

"He will do nothing. He will be dead," he replied bluntly. 

“He’ll see you coming. The Sith expect betrayal, it’s their nature.” She headed into the bedroom, where the handmaidens were depositing the supplies she requested.

"You strongly underestimate my power."

“I’m trying to keep you alive.” She coughed and winced at the residual pain from having her throat compressed.

"I've been doing that since I was nine. I think I did pretty well so far, minus negotiating my freedom to a family of tyrants," he grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“Yes, Anakin, I’m well aware that you hate me, now get on the bed and take your shirt off so that I can more effectively treat you.”

Anakin rolled his eyes and he slowly stripped off his clothes. "I thought I had told you I don't hate you. It's just difficult to like you when you think like you do."

“You just called me a tyrant. That isn’t something you say unless you hate someone,” she argued, passing him one of the towels.

"Don't be sensitive. You know what I mean." He accepted the towel. "What do I do with this?" 

“Wrap it around yourself, the heat helps relax your muscles,” she answered, pushing up the red silk sleeves of her dress.

He wrapped the towel around his waist, pushing the hair on his forehead back. "And now?" The heat of the towel against the muscles of his legs was nice and he could feel some of the tension dissipating.

“Lie down and I’ll see about your back,” she instructed.

Nodding, he laid down on the bed, wincing as his muscles complained with his movements. "You're upset." He realized.

“Yes, Anakin, I’m upset,” she confirmed, pouring some bacta gel on her hands and rubbing it into his back. 

He gasped as the cold bacta gel soothed his tense muscles. He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead on his hands. "With me?" 

“No.”

"It's not worth it to be upset with your father. I knew this would happen, Padmé. It's who he is."

“It never should have happened in the first place,” she said grimly. “If I’d just… If I could have been what he needed. Things would be different.”

"The problem isn't yours. It's his. Padmé, he's insane. Absolutely crazy. He's a Sith. This whole situation is no one's fault but his."

“It’s easy for you to say that. Your entire life isn’t built around your failure.”

"In a way, it was." He whispered. 

She opened her mouth to argue, then thought better of it. “Let’s not talk about it anymore. Tell me where else it hurts.”

"Everywhere, really, but I'm already feeling better," he mumbled. "You're really good at massages."

“I’ve had a lot of time to practice.” Her pace slowed a little. “Do you want anything to eat when we’re done? Or anything to entertain yourself? I have to have some treatments of my own done.”

"Anything that I can help you with? You're doing it for me, it's only fair I can return the favor." He turned his head to look at her. 

“What I need isn’t nearly as pleasant as a massage,” she said matter-of-factly. “It’s a special bacta injection for my throat. The girls are used to doing it. You don’t need to worry about me.”

"Like you don't need to worry about me and yet here you are. I would like to do something for you too. Anything."

“Anakin, that’s sweet, but I really don’t need you to stick a needle into my neck.”

"There are more comfortable ways to release the hurt on your throat. If you let me." He said, sitting up. She looked at him skeptically, but nodded her consent slowly.

"Sit down, and don't be scared," he half-smiled as he raised his hands to her throat. She complied, still wary as she sat next to him. "I won't hurt you. This doesn't do much for me, Sith lightning is extremely difficult to treat with the light side but…" he placed his hands softly at her throat, his touch gentle and caring. A warmth spread from his fingers to her skin, slipping inside her nerves, soothing and healing the injuries, old and new. "How is it feeling?" 

“Better,” she said, a little shocked. “I didn’t know the Force could do that.”

As the warmth continued to spread, he smiled. "It can when you're connected to the Light. Dark can never heal." He pursed his lips. "I will never let him do that to you again."

“It may not be up to you,” she reminded him. “And someday, you might not mind it, if he gets his way.”

"When that day comes, I hope someone is strong enough to kill me." His hand fell down to his sides. "There. All better."

“Thank you.” She leaned in and kissed his cheek gently.

"No more needles for you." He touched her face softly.

“Do you still hurt anywhere?” she asked, leaning into his touch.

"Depends. What are your plans for the rest of the day?" 

“I didn’t have any. My schedule is generally blank, unless Father decides I need to do a public appearance at a charity or some such thing.”

"And I don't feel like we have to join your father for dinner, so, there is a lot of free time in our hands."

“I realize you’re probably hinting at sex, Anakin, but honestly, I’d rather just sit in bed and watch holodramas.”

Anakin raised his eyebrows. "Nothing against that, but I can't believe you just turned down sex."

“I’m not in the mood at this moment,” she said with a shrug. “Medical play isn’t really one of my kinks.”

"Good with me." He beamed and kissed her cheek. 

She looked around for the remote that controlled the bedroom viewscreen. “Can you ask the handmaidens to bring us something to eat while I try to find the remote and get out of this dress? There should be a robe you can wear too.”

“Deal,” he sighed, pulling away and standing up. “Thank you,” he said suddenly. “For the aftercare.”

“I promised I’d take care of you,” she reminded him with a small smile. “I keep my promises.”


	7. Burning Every Bridge

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for the chapter: BDSM including bloodplay, waxplay, beating.

“Disappointing.” Sidious tapped his fingers on the arms of his throne as he watched Anakin with the PROXY droid. “Such promise as a duelist, and yet, you cannot commit to what needs to be done. Perhaps it is for the best that you’ve failed to provide me with a grandchild. They might have inherited your weakness.”

“Or the Force is not willing to bless us,” Anakin replied bluntly, sore muscles complaining from the training that has been going on for ten hours straight, without a break, without eating, without care. It had been three months since his wedding to Padmé and his training had only intensified and became worse than ever.

“Do you even fuck her anymore?” the Emperor asked, leaning forward with an evil gleam in his eyes. “Or does  _ she _ take that role?”

“What we do inside our chambers should be none of your concern,” he scowled. “It’s disgusting to think of your daughter like that,  _ Master. _ ”

“When a man’s daughter acts like a common harlot, he has every right to think whatever he wants of her.” Sidious stretched out his hand, the crackle of lightning appearing on his fingertips. “But if it offends you so, do something about it. Use the Dark Side. Give in to your anger. Strike at me. Isn’t that what you’ve wanted all along?”

Anakin held back, opting to glare at Sidious. “Just because it hasn’t happened, it doesn’t mean it never will. You’ll have everything you deserve soon, Master.”

“Repeat the sequence again,” growled the Emperor. “Or stop wasting my time and go do something useful.”

“I could go and try to impregnate your daughter,” he drawled out. “If that would please you.”

“It will if you actually succeed,” Sidious growled. “But I expect results soon, or I will have to resort to drastic measures.”

“Am I dismissed, Master?” Anakin stiffened.

“Out of my sight.” The lightning crackled on his palms warningly.

Sighing, Anakin bowed and left the training room as fast as he humanly could. He was exhausted. He wanted to rest. To sleep! 

When he reached the suite, he found Padmé and the handmaidens all in various states of sprawled across the floor in their nightgowns. “You’re done early,” his wife said weakly as she raised her head to look at him. “Everything alright? Or at least as alright as it can be when Father’s involved?”

“I’m good,” he frowned, looking around the room. “What happened to the lot of you? You look like you are high on something.”

“We’re all on the same cycle,” Sabé groaned from the other side of the couch. “One of us bleeds, we all bleed.”

“It’s not usually this melodramatic,” Padmé promised Anakin as she managed to sit up properly. “This just happens to be a bad month.”

“Ah, I see,” he grimaced. “Anything I can do for you?” He looked directly at Padmé.

“Not unless Force healing works on cramps,” she joked.

“Does it?” Eirtaé asked eagerly.

“None of you get to use my husband like that,” Padmé snapped.

Anakin suppressed the urge to grin at her possessiveness. “I don’t know. I can try, though,” he extended his hand to her. “Come on, I think we both could use some rest.”

“Please,” she agreed, leaning on him as she stood up. “I feel horribly lazy, you have much more reason to be tired than I do.”

“I’ll feel better taking care of you,” he kissed her temple. “You have taken care of me all these months,” he nuzzled her cheek, before glancing over his shoulder. “Feel better, girls.”

“Kriff you,” one of them complained as the door shut behind him and Padmé, who laughed. 

“She doesn’t mean it.”

“I know, tough time of the month. They need husbands.”

“I should probably let them go,” she agreed, falling onto the bed face first. “But then I’d miss them.”

“It doesn’t have to be like that, and it doesn’t have to be now,” he assured her. “So, holo-movies and lots of junk food for us?” He squeezed her to him.

“Yes, but I also kind of,” she rolled over in his arms and blushed, “I kind of want to suck you off. Hormones in flux. I’m miserable and yet you look incredibly attractive to me right now.”

“What about you? Are you going to be sexually frustrated until the end of your cycle?” He raised his eyebrows. “Because I’m not telling you no to your offer, I could use the release.”

“I’m not sure you want to add blood to the mix, pet,” she pointed out. “If we did that, it’d have to be in the bath.”

“Doesn’t it… hurt?” He squirmed uncomfortably.

“Not in the way you might think, but I can tell by your face that it doesn’t turn you on. And I’m still perfectly capable of masturbating.”

“It’s not that it doesn’t turn me on, we can draw a hot bath and get in there, and trust me, I’ll completely forget about everything else. I’m not squeamish about blood, can you imagine?” He snorted.

“Well, at present, I don’t feel the need to orgasm, so how about I just suck your cock until the junk food gets here?”

“Deal,” he grinned. “I’ll be extra nice when you’re feeling up to being pampered with orgasms.”

“Whatever else, I’m so glad I introduced you to the beauty of sex,” she laughed. “You are a most excellent student.”

“Ah, you should have had the chance to tell that to Obi-Wan. He would have pointed out, alphabetically and chronologically, how that is actually not me,” Anakin barked a laugh.

“Though we obviously still need to work on dirty talk.” She reached over to his waistband, tugging it down. “Generally, you don’t bring up your old teachers when your wife is about to pleasure you.”

“Oh, I need to work on that?” He challenged, biting his lip as she tugged on his pants. “How about I can’t wait to see you on your knees, sucking me off?”

“Is that how it is?” She slid off the bed into the position he had just described, pulling his pants down with her. 

"Yes. Do you know how to do it or do you want me to fuck your mouth?" He caressed her locks, blue eyes darkening with desire. Her response was to lick the tip of his shaft and part her lips further, offering the full cavity of her mouth to him. "Taking orders also suits you," he smirked and he thrust inside her mouth, groaning as the heat and wetness of her mouth made him harden further. "Fuck." He cursed, fisting his hand on her hair. She gripped his ass with both hands, her nails biting into the skin as his cock hit the back of her throat. He started to pull out before thrusting back in and started a good rhythm, moaning, her name falling from his lips as if it were a prayer. 

Over the last few months, this connection with her, sex and their moments where they understood each other fully, were the only things that kept him sane. Without them, he might have already lost his mind. 

_ Feed me, _ she spoke in his mind, giving his backside a little squeeze. He gasped as his thrusts became quicker before he stilled, grunting and spilling inside of her mouth. As his cock deflated, she rose, kissing him gently with his spend still on her lips. “Nothing tastes better,” she murmured, leaning her head in the crook of his shoulder.

"Hmm," he brushed his lips over her forehead. "You haven't had a chance to taste yourself.” There was a knock on their door and Anakin sighed. "It's the food. "

“I’ll get it.  _ You _ find the remote. And either find a robe or stay hidden,” she suggested, her eyes flicking along his body. “No one gets to see you like this but me.”

He shook his head amused and grabbed a black silk robe to cover his shoulders and changed to a pair of silk pajama pants. "Have I told you being possessive looks good on you?" 

“I think you might have mentioned it,” she chuckled, approaching the door and opening it. Dormé passed over the enormous tray of food without a word, just a knowing raise of the eyebrows. “Thank you. We’ll see you in the morning.”

“Of course, your highness,” Dormé hesitated. “A message came from your father, he’ll be expecting your husband for training at the usual hour. Don’t sleep in too much.”

“Does Father know what time of the month it is?”

“I didn’t bring it up, Princess.”

“Then tell him that if Anakin is late, it’s because we’re doing our duty to the Empire. Good night, Dormé.”

Anakin sat on the bed, pursing his lips. "He's getting tired. I know he's planning my big downfall. I feel it. I'm afraid of what he'll do." He confessed, lazily switching the channels. 

“I am too,” Padmé admitted, moving to set the tray down as Dormé closed the door. She passed him a mug of hot chocolate. “The small comfort is knowing he won’t kill you.”

"You think he won't?" He snorted before sipping the chocolate. "He'll kill us both as soon as he has an heir to his bloodline. Or did you think he would let us, the imperfect daughter and Apprentice, taint his legacy?" 

“He won’t kill you for the time being,” she amended grimly. “And there’s no guarantee of  _ when _ that heir will come. Even if I do get pregnant, for all we know, the baby could be as lacking in the Force as I am.”

"My midi-chlorian count is close to thirty thousand. Unless you cheat on me, that is never going to happen. Our children will be gifted. It's both a blessing and a curse," he sighed, grabbing a little cake and stuffing it in his mouth. 

“Children?” she repeated. “You picture us having more than one somehow?”

"It's an expression and I've told you exactly how I feel about that subject," he scowled. "No children while your father breathes, and when he dies… Well, we'll cross that bridge once we get there."

“I know.” She sighed. “Let’s do what we said we would and just watch the holo-dramas.”

Anakin observed her for a long moment. "You don't want to have a baby right now either."

“It was easy to think about it in the abstract, when my only responsibility was birthing it. You’ve made it complicated.” Her tone was neutral and professional, rather than accusing. “And the longer we try and fail at this, the more concerned I become that my fate will be the same as my mother’s. Selfish as it might be, I don’t want to die.”

"You're not going to die and you won't suffer the same fate as your mother because I'm not your father, Padmé. We're failing because the Force knows it's wrong,"  _ and I'm still on contraceptives.  _

“Anakin, you can’t be sure of all of that,” she sighed, pulling back the covers and burrowing under them. “Let’s just not talk about it anymore. Please.”

Sighing, he got up and opened a trunk filled with his things. He searched for a while before he found what he wanted, closed the trunk, and returned to sit next to her on the bed, clutching something in his hand. "I want to give you something."

She looked up at him doubtfully. “What is it?”

He opened his palm and took the leather cord, dangling a japor snippet before her eyes. "A good luck charm. A symbol of how much we're different from your parents."

She reached out and ran her fingers over it, examining it with a curious eye. “I’ve never seen anything like this before. It’s unusual.”

"I made it." He confessed. 

“Unusual,” she repeated. “And beautiful. Thank you.”

"It was my parting gift to my mother. I hope it's better for you." She pulled aside her hair so he could place it around her neck.

“I don’t know what luck for us would look like, but I agree with the sentiment,” she admitted.

Anakin tied the cord behind her neck and he sighed. "One day at a time."

“Yes, Angel, one day at a time.”

* * *

Rather than the throne room, Sidious summoned Anakin to the hangar bay. No, summoned was the wrong word. He was escorted by a squadron from the 501st straight into a shuttle that took him directly up to the Super Star Destroyer. 

“What is the meaning of this?” He turned to Rex, who had become his greatest confidante. 

“Orders, sir,” Rex replied. “It’s all we know.” As the shuttle landed in the loading bay and opened its doors, a group of the red-cloaked guards who followed the Emperor everywhere moved forward, gesturing with the ends of their pikes for Anakin to follow them. “They’re sending us back to Imperial Center. Can’t leave your wife unprotected.”

Anakin had a sinking feeling, deep in his stomach. As if the Force was sending red alerts all over him. This was not good. This was bad. Really bad and as he left the 501st to follow the Emperor’s personal guard, he dreaded what Sidious had planned. 

There was a throne room on the Super Star Destroyer too, because of  _ course _ there was. Force forbid Sidious go anywhere without a fancy chair to sit on. “Kneel,” he said coldly as the guards deposited Anakin at the foot of the steps leading up to the throne, then moved to the edges of the room.

He had learned not to hesitate and he did so, keeping a cold facade. Incredibly, he had no trouble kneeling and being his wife’s puppet, but when required to kneel as an Apprentice, he resisted. “Master?” 

“I have been considering our situation since yesterday, and it seems to me that you need a more dramatic push in the right direction. More opportunity to embrace the true power of the Dark Side.”

A shill went over his spine. “How so, Master? I have been making progress,” he knew he was. His emotions were volatile. He was prone to mood swings, lashing out and being taken over with anger and hate. Something that rarely before happened. He was centered, Obi-Wan assured that would not happen and being a Master to Ahsoka had made him want to be a good role model.

“You lack commitment. I intend to remedy that today. We are en route to a Rebel base that was recently discovered, one that has a Jedi among its members. Luminara Unduli. When we arrive, you will be dispatched to the base, and you  _ will _ kill her.” No. Not Luminara. He wouldn’t be able to kill her, kill his own kind. No, he couldn’t recover from an action like that.  _ He knows that. It’s what he wants. _ He had to do something. Warn her in any kind of way. “I will expect you to bring back her lightsaber and her corpse as proof,” Sidious added, probably sensing Anakin’s thoughts of saving her. “Is that clear,  _ my _ Apprentice?”

“Yes, Master,” his voice was small as his eyes turned to the ground.  _ What am I going to do now?  _ He needed a plan. He couldn’t kill Luminara.  _ I can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I’ll be starting down a path I could never return from.  _

“Good. Good.” Sidious nodded. “I suggest you use the remainder of our journey to prepare yourself for battle. But the training saber is no longer necessary. Come here.” He stretched out his hand in a mocking gesture of benevolence. Standing up, his legs a bit shaky, he climbed the three steps so he could approach the Sith sitting on the throne. Sidious extended a black and silver lightsaber hilt.

“A temporary solution. When you return, we will see about you assembling a proper saber,” he said with a sneer. “And before you think about running, or betraying me in any way, I suggest you consider your wife and her handmaidens, currently surrounded by the 501st. It would be a shame if their inhibitor chips were to malfunction and they turned on her.”

Anakin froze. “You would kill your own daughter?” he scowled. “You wouldn’t do that. She could be carrying your heir. You wouldn’t kill her.”

“Do you really want to call that bluff, my boy?” Sidious challenged serenely. “The two of you failed me this far, I have very little patience left, and if she cannot be of use to me, then she is nothing to me.”

He could sense in the man’s words that he wouldn’t hesitate to give the order that would kill Padmé and her handmaidens. And the dark part of him, or maybe it was the protectiveness he felt towards his wife, felt that Luminara’s life could be taken if it granted Padmé’s safety. That thought scared him. It just showed how much weight the dark side already had on his soul. “It will be done, Master.”

“Good. Leave me. Prepare yourself. And do  _ not _ disappoint me.”

Anakin nodded as he took the saber and retreated to his chambers, feeling divided. On one side, he had a Master Jedi that he knew, that had been part of his growth as a member of the Order. On the other side, he had Padmé. Given their history and just  _ why  _ he was in this position, he shouldn’t care about what happened to her. He should shrug it off, pick the lightsaber and save the Rebel base by turning against Sidious. It would give him his freedom back and he could return to Obi-Wan and Ahsoka’s side and fight the rest of the war where he was meant to be. 

But… he couldn’t deny that he felt something for the Imperial Princess, as screwed up as it was. He understood why she was the way she was. He could see who she could  _ be  _ if she dedicated herself. He cared. Too much to let anything happen to her, and that made him want to scream in frustration. He couldn’t win. By killing Luminara, he would be losing himself. By letting Padmé be killed, he would be losing her.

Whatever decision he made, he was doomed.

* * *

“You have to fight me,” Anakin swallowed the lump in his throat, his hand shaking as he held the unfamiliar lightsaber with the beaming red light. “And win. You have to, Luminara, it’s the only way. Kill me if you have to. Cut off one of my arms.  _ Both. _ Just win.” He begged.

The Mirialan looked at him sadly, spinning her own green blade. “That would only end with both of us dead, would it not?” she asked, her blue eyes gazing into his serenely.

“You would have a chance to save yourself. You’re an amazing duelist. I’ve seen you fight, Luminara,  _ please _ , do something,” his voice broke. “Because I  _ can’t  _ do this. The only way to give you and...”  _ Padmé,  _ “another innocent life the chance to fight, is for you to defeat me.”

She sighed and adopted a starting position. “I will fight you if that is what you wish, Anakin, but my first duty is to the Galaxy, not to myself.”

“If I turn to the Dark Side, there’s no saving this Galaxy. We both know that. We both know that that can’t happen. So, as your first duty, defeat me,” he said. “It’s in everyone’s best interest and think of how it would hurt the Emperor if he lost me. He would go ballistic, the Rebels would have a chance to strike.”

She didn’t reply, only continued staring at him intently. 

“Master Unduli… you know me.” He turned off his red saber.  _ I can’t do this. I prefer to die myself. _

“And I know that this is neither your destiny, nor what the Force wills for you,” she drew closer to him. “Trust in what Qui-Gon Jinn believed.”

“I’m more trouble than I’m worth,” he shook his head. 

“You have a difficult path to walk,” she agreed. “But I trust you to see it through to the end. Chosen One.” What happened next, he couldn’t have anticipated. Through no act of his own, the red blade of his unwanted saber activated, running straight through her stomach. She shuddered slightly and then the blade turned off once more and she slumped forward into his arms.

Anakin gasped, horrified, as he held her, the realization of what happened hitting him and breaking something inside of him. “No,  _ no,  _ what did you do, Master?” He whispered frantically as he carefully knelt to the ground, holding her in his arms, her blood staining his vest. “No, I can fix it, I can heal you,” he said.

“No,” she whispered. “I have done what I must for the galaxy. You must do the same.”

“Oh,  _ Force, _ ” he whispered as his eyes filled with tears, as they quickly came down his cheeks. “This was not supposed to happen.” 

“Trust in the Force,” she advised as her breathing slowed and he felt her presence in the Force diminishing. "And yourself."

As she slipped away, her body becoming limp, something definitely changed within him. Something broke. His spirit, his heart, whatever it was, he knew he wasn’t the same. He might have not activated the saber, but it was because of him that she had lost her life. “I’m so sorry. So, so sorry, Master Unduli.”

What would Obi-Wan think?

Ahsoka?

The rest of the Order?

They would see him as a traitor, a Jedi killer. The people he called family would think of him as a monster, Jedi blood staining his hands. He could never return to them. All hope that he had of ever going back home had evaporated. 

His desperate face became emotionless as he summoned Luminara’s saber to his hand and he stood, with her in his arms. This was the proof Sidious wanted, after all. He didn’t know how long he walked with Luminara’s dead body in his arms, her fresh blood in his clothes, hands, everywhere. He knows he tried not to think. Not to feel. For him, right now, all hope had died and he knew there was no going back.

It was the beginning of the end for him.

Sidious must have felt the Jedi Master’s passing too, for he was waiting for Anakin with his guards and a shuttle on the planet’s surface. And he had the gall to laugh when he saw Anakin. “Well done, my young friend,” he cackled. “And this shall only be the first.”

Anakin set Luminara down on the ground with her lightsaber on her chest. He worried about what would be done to her body. She deserved better. So much better. “Thank you, Master,” he answered robotically.

“Smile, my boy, you’ll have plenty to celebrate with your wife when we return home. Not only your success in combat, but your new promotion. And your new name.”

Anakin raised his eyes to meet Sidious’. “Master?”

“It shall be a glorious affair. We’ll reintroduce you to the entire Empire as the Supreme Commander of the Imperial Forces. Darth Vader.” The Emperor’s eyes gleamed evilly. “At last. I have been waiting to bestow that name upon you for quite some time.”

_ Vader.  _ His blood ran cold at what it meant. At what the change meant. It meant that sooner, rather than later, he would need Obi-Wan to save him. To kill him. Now Anakin knew it would be the only way he would achieve complete freedom. Surrender himself to his Master’s expertise and the Force’s mercy.

* * *

Padmé was waiting for them at the hangar when they returned to the palace, practically knocking Anakin over as she rushed into his arms. Anakin barely acknowledged her, his eyes very empty as he closed his eyes, taking one step back. He didn’t want to be touched.

She seemed to sense this, releasing her hold and moving away to look at her father. “What happened? What did you do to him?”

“Your husband has finally done something right. He’s finally ready to be what he was destined to,” Sidious said, pleased. “Darth Vader, Lord of the Sith. Jedi slayer.” Anakin hid his cringe at his description, but he stiffened. “At last, one of you has done something to make me proud.”

“I see,” Padmé said rather coldly. “Well, he’s clearly exhausted, so I think it’s best if  _ I _ take things from here. I’m sure you don’t need anything else from him at the moment.”

“Just make sure he’s well-rested for tomorrow’s naming ceremony. The whole Galaxy will know him now with the appropriate titles. Until then, you are both dismissed.”

“Yes, Father.” Padmé leaned towards Anakin, but not enough that they were making contact. “Anakin, I’m going to take you back to our rooms now, alright?” she asked softly. He nodded as he leaned into her as well, automatically at the sound of her voice. She ran a hand through his hair as they walked through the halls back to their apartments.

“You don’t need to tell me how it happened,” she informed him as they reached the bedroom. “I’m sure it was horrible, I won’t make you relive it.”

“Thank you,” he said quietly. The image of Luminara’s dead body in his hands, her blood slipping through his fingers and staining his clothes was something he would never forget. It would haunt him forever.

“Do you want anything? A bath? Something to eat?” she asked. He shook his head as he sat on the bed, feeling helpless about his future, about how Sidious had achieved what he wanted. To break him. To effectively separate him from the Jedi. Sighing, Padmé moved away from him. She knew he blamed her, and he was right to do so. This situation was one entirely of her making. “I’ll be in the spare room tonight. Give you the space you need,” she said finally.

“You could punish me,” he blurted out.  _ That’s what I deserve anyway. _

She stopped, certain she’d misheard him. “What?”

“You need me to repeat it?” He snapped.

“Anakin, you’re clearly not in a healthy place right now mentally, you don’t—”

“I’ll never return to such a place if there was ever was one. What? You’ve gotten shy in the time I was away?” He hissed through gritted teeth, eyes narrowing as they turned a weird shade of blue. She bit her lip and placed her hand against the wall.

“How much do you want me to hurt you?” she asked slowly. “How badly?”

“Do your worst,” he replied flatly, staring dully at the wall in front of him.

“Love,” she reminded him. “You say that, and I stop.” He nodded, fists tightening around the fabric of the covers. “Then turn around. Spreadeagle.”

“Clothes?” He questioned, looking at himself.

“I’ll handle those,” she said, her voice becoming cold and detached. “Now do what you’re told. And don’t make me ask again.”

If he wanted to hurt so badly, she’d comply, but she hoped it wouldn’t go for very long. She slipped into the closet, exchanging her high-waisted blue and gold gown for a one-piece undergarment of shining black leather with a matching collar and boots that went over her knees.

He obeyed her, turning around in the bed and adopting the position she said. He was aching for the pain she could inflict because he needed to hurt, he needed to bleed. He needed to know that in some messed up way, he was being punished by the loss he had inflicted on the Galaxy.

Padmé pressed her hand into the detailing on the wall, and from the posts on her bed, a set of binders sprang out, latching around his wrists and ankles and pulling him out into a spreadeagle position. Then she opened one of the trunks against the wall and pulled out a serrated silver blade. Moving over to Anakin’s side, she placed the blade at the back of his neck and activated it, ripping away his shirt and occasionally nicking the skin of his back. She left his pants intact. For now.

“You want to hurt.” She placed a finger on one of the nicks, forcing the blood to pool on his skin.

“Yes.” He admitted coldly.

“And to bleed. To suffer. You don’t want pleasure tonight.”

“No.”

She sighed, moving away from him to look through the trunk. “Do you think if you push me far enough, Anakin, I’ll kill you? Is that what this is?” He didn’t reply, because honestly, he hadn’t thought of that, but if she did, it wouldn’t be so bad. “I’m not going to do that,” she informed him, straddling him from behind and scraping the knife against his skin. “You are  _ mine _ , and I refuse to let you go.” As the blade reached the small of his back, she began rubbing a salve into his skin, one that definitely wasn’t bacta. It  _ burned  _ where it touched him.

Anakin’s hiss was low, but his muscles definitely reacted underneath her. He closed his eyes, focusing on the sharp feeling on his skin. It was welcomed. Leaning down, she bit him on the right shoulder, so quickly and so roughly that the skin broke, and he could feel her tongue lapping at the blood as it flowed forth. “I’ll hurt you tonight because you want it,” she growled in his ear. “But I’ll give you pleasure because  _ I _ want it.” Her hips began to grind against his backside, one hand reached around to grip his pectoral, her nails digging into the sensitive skin around his nipple. He gasped but bit his lip to keep his moan from leaving his mouth. He wasn’t searching for pleasure, he was searching for pain and he was not inclined to accept the former. “One way or another, you’re going to scream,” she warned.

“Good,” he muttered, his emotions bubbling on the surface, ready to burst. She bit her lip and reached for the last thing she’d retrieved from the chest, the thing she’d sworn never to use again.

“You’re going to count, Anakin, and I suggest you not lose track,” she warned, raising the crop above her head and bringing it down on his shoulders with a resounding  _ thwack. _

He knew he should have used his safeword from the moment he realized what she was wearing, but in a way, he was glad she picked the crop. It caused him pain the last time, it should repeat it now. “One,” he started. She struck him again, in the perpendicular direction to create a cross on his back. “Two.” She continued hitting him, faster and faster, and as her pace increased, her hips moved in time. He could feel the heat and the wetness of her arousal as the precum leaked from her folds. Then she stopped, climbing off him and walking over to the hidden switch on the wall. When she pressed it, the binders released him onto the bed with an unceremonious thud. He let out a groan and moved stiffly. His back was sore, every muscle ached, but he didn’t complain, this was what he was looking for.

“Turn around,” she ordered. As he did so, his back made contact with the sheet and he bit back a hiss at the burning sensation. He focused on keeping his eyes on the ceiling, focusing on the sensation. Padmé hit the button again, locking him in place once more and returned to his side with a strip of black leather that she wrapped around his mouth. “You may scream, but I won’t hear it,” she predicted. If he really needed the safeword, that was what the Force was for.

Just as she had during their honeymoon, she positioned herself above his face, but rather than make him use his tongue, she let her own fingers do the work, pushing aside the fabric of her one-piece to prod and tease at her clit until she spilled directly onto his face. His moan was muffled by the leather strap on his mouth and he shifted, his cock hardening as he watched her.

“Are you still so sure you don’t want pleasure?” she taunted, twisting around and settling on the pillows so that his head was nestled in her lap.

He nodded his head because he was sure of what he wanted and it wasn’t pleasure. He wasn’t looking for relief after what he had done. He was looking for the opposite and independently of what she wanted, he knew better.

“Fine.” She reached over to the end table next to the bed and lifted one of the candles she burned to make the room smell floral. She held it inches above his stomach, slowly turning it until the flame was directly over his skin. Hot wax dripped downward, hitting his flesh with a hiss. The muscles in his stomach contracted and he closed his eyes, mouth biting the leather. As she moved the candle along his skin, the flame occasionally singed his body hair, and the wax began to form a pattern of runes he didn’t recognize. She bit him again, giving him a matching mark on his left shoulder. His gasp was muffled, but heard this time, as her actions progressed, he was having a more difficult time keeping sounds within.

She unfastened the gag with the hand not holding the candle. “Scream for me now, Angel,” she hissed in his ear before striking across his torso with the gag in the same way she’d used the riding crop. He let out a loud cry, shutting his eyes closed.

It should have aroused her to see him like this. But all it did was make her feel hollow and wrong. She slid out from under him and off the bed, moving to release him. “I’m done,” she said with a sigh. “I won’t punish you for something that isn’t your fault. If you’re that determined to hurt yourself, I’ll leave the toys for you to use however you see fit, but I’m not going to do this anymore.”

Anakin sat up, looking clearly annoyed. “All you  _ dreamed  _ before you got me to marry you was doing this and now you don’t want to do it?” He scowled. “What? You grew morals over the last few months, is that what it was? What happened to wanting to  _ break  _ me?”

“I didn’t want it like this. There’s no pleasure in this.”

He scoffed, throwing his legs to the side and standing up. “Not even for this are you useful,” he said bitterly, pushing past her to leave the rooms.

“So glad to know you’re learning from my father,” she shot back, but he was already slamming the door behind him. She slumped against the wall and curled in on herself, feeling for the first time like the powerless victim he’d said she was.


	8. Desperate Gambits

“Are you going to be using these at any point?” Dormé asked, holding up a spiked collar, and Padmé shook her head.

“Even if Anakin weren’t,” she trailed off, picking at the seam in the middle of her sleeve where the pale pink satin met thin white silk. “No, it’s too close to slavery. Things are already bad enough. Get rid of it.”

“How many assignments has your father given him since he was declared Darth Vader?” Eirtaé asked gently.

“I think this is the fifteenth,” Padmé sighed. “I’m losing him more and more every time.”

“If you conceived, it could distract him,” Dormé said softly. “Despite his struggles with the idea, he would be a good father.”

“Or, you could do something now and take him out of Imperial Center for a while,” Sabé suggested.

“Father would never agree to the latter, and Anakin doesn’t even want to have sex at this point,” Padmé pointed out bitterly. “He doesn’t feel he deserves the pleasure that would come from it, and I don’t know how to help him at this point.”

“He is pleased with Anakin’s work. If you took him away for two or three days, he might not refuse. Anakin needs to rest. He can’t deny him that.” Eirtaé argued. 

“Or just take him without asking for permission,” Sabé stated bluntly. “We all know he’s resentful. It has been five months since the wedding. There is no child. So he would have one more reason to resent you?” She shrugged. “Take care of your husband.”

“I think I know why you haven’t conceived,” Yané said quietly, from her corner on the couch. She had been oddly silent the whole day, a frown permanent on her face. The other women looked at her curiously.

“What are you talking about?” Padmé asked slowly, narrowing her eyes. “And choose your next words carefully.”

“Well,” she looked around the room and all eyes were on her. “You know I sometimes hang out with the clones on their time off, right? They get drunk and get rowdy and often spill some of the juiciest secrets in the Palace, I mean, where do you think I would get all the gossip?” She twisted the hem of her dress. “One of them, Echo, tried to flirt with me. But he had already drunk a lot, and he was doing all these crazy things to get my attention and then… he said he knew why my mistress was not yet carrying.”

“Don’t keep us in suspense, tell us!” Saché begged, grabbing her friend’s arm.

“Anakin has been taking the standard contraceptives issued to the clones,” Yané blurted. “Rex gives them to him. He’s been doing this since the wedding. I’m so sorry, my lady.” 

Padmé sat perfectly still, staring straight ahead with her brown eyes glassy and unfocused. She was simultaneously relieved and hurt by this news. Relieved, because it meant the problem wasn’t her, and hurt that Anakin would keep this secret from her for so long.

“My lady?” Dormé whispered. “Are you alright?”

“Please get my datapad, and then go pack my things,” she said distantly. “And get my yacht ready to depart.”

They all stood silently, Eirtaé passing her the datapad as she requested, and they left the sitting room, one by one, until it was just Padmé. She tucked her legs under her skirts as she picked up where she’d left off in her reading, waiting for Anakin to come back. The writing was dense, but she’d be lying if she said she didn’t find the subject fascinating. Politics, it seemed, was in her blood where the Force was not. It calmed her and intrigued her, and hopefully, it would keep her occupied long enough that when he returned, she wouldn’t want to hurt him. 

She didn’t know how long it had been, but it was already dark out there when there was a knock on the door and Anakin entered, carrying an aura of guilt and self-loathing, his blonde curls nearly hiding his dull, dark eyes and it was a reminder that he was in need of a haircut. “Eirtaé said you might want to see me?” He leaned against the door, arms crossed, black robes with a hint of silver from his lightsaber, giving him an intimidating look.

“You had to know I would find out eventually,” she said calmly without looking up from her reading. “How long did you think you could keep your little secret?”

“Shame, here I thought I could keep a mistress without you finding out,” he drawled out sarcastically.

“I’m talking about the contraceptives, Anakin.”

“I didn’t think I would last this long,” he shrugged, unbothered by the discovery. “Honestly, after the first month of not achieving any results or even the second, I thought you would start to get suspicious. But since you didn’t…” He trailed off.

“I thought _I_ was the problem.” She set down the datapad and folded her arms across her chest. “I gave you the benefit of the doubt, I trusted you.”

“You trusted a man who you claimed hated you. A man who has stated, more than once, that he would not have a child with you but kept having sex every night. I’m not the dumb one here, Padmé.”

“You could have at least _told_ me!” she huffed. “You knew I had my own reservations, and you said nothing!”

“I did the smart thing,” he paused. “I didn’t trust you.”

“You knew how dangerous it was! For both of us!” she argued. “I’ve _tried_ to make this work, I’ve tried to take care of you like I promised! But you’ve just been so _selfish_!”

“No, I survived. It’s what I’ve done so far. Survived your father. Survived you. However, I’m starting to think that committing suicide would have been the smart option here, because living in a horror house, in a real nightmare, is not as fun as I made it up to be in my mind,” he said so calmly, it was chilling. “Are you expecting me to apologize?”

“I thought,” Padmé bit her lip, surprised as tears began to form in her eyes. “I thought we had at least… never mind. Just pack your things. We’re leaving for Varykino tonight.”

“Why?” He sighed. “I’m tired and I want to rest. You can go if you want to.”

“You’re coming with me because I’m not leaving you alone with my father,” she informed him bluntly. “This isn’t about sex or punishment, or anything of that sort, it’s just about distance. The only way he’ll let you leave this palace for anything that’s not one of his demented missions is if it’s with me.”

“You just found out I’ve been lying to your face and you want to take me to Varykino?” He raised one eyebrow.

“What were you expecting, that I’d tie you to the bed right now and fuck you for a month straight?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “Maybe. Maybe give me to your father. Or kill me yourself. I don’t know, really, I never really thought about it.”

“I’m a lot of terrible things,” admitted Padmé softly. “But not that. I could never be that. Not to you. Now go pack. Please.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he muttered, turning around and leaving her alone in the sitting-room again. She scowled and returned to her reading, waiting for him to return. He returned half an hour later, his mood the same. “Are we leaving today?” Anakin asked with a roll of his eyes.

“Yes.” She tucked the datapad under her arm and got to her feet. “Now, in fact. Come on.”

Anakin stepped to the side to let her leave first, before following after her. “Your father won’t like it.”

“He’ll like it more than he’d like to find out what you’ve done for the last five months,” she snapped, storming down the hall.

“Ooh, tell him, I want to know what he will do,” he taunted. Any sense of self-preservation he might have had before was completely shut off.

“Well, I don’t!” she shouted.

“You should know, the fear you have of your father is a turn-off. And also explains why you decided to live in blissful ignorance. Standing up to people can be tiring.”

She very nearly slapped him across the face for that, but bit her tongue instead. “Just get in the ship before I change my mind and stop trying to protect you.”

“Wow, mean,” he rolled his eyes, going up the ramp of the cruiser. Padmé followed him and grabbed the co-pilot’s seat next to Sabé. None of the 501st would be coming along this time.

“She won’t be in the cabin if you want to rest, your highness,” Dormé informed Anakin. “In fact, I strongly recommend it.”

“All of you think you bossing me around is that how it works?” He quipped. “What if I don’t rest? You’ll punish me too, like a child?”

“No, but I would rather the two of you didn’t fight in close quarters like this. It’s exhausting to watch.”

“I’ll go and rest,” he shrugged and headed off to the quarters. He could use the sleep. “Don’t want to tire you all,” Anakin drawled out over his shoulder before he entered the cabin.

“Terrible, the both of them,” Eirtaé said, shaking her head as she grabbed Dormé’s arm and pulled her away from the closing door. “They’ll never figure it out.”

* * *

Padmé leaned against the railing of the veranda, staring across the lake to watch the setting suns. There was a slight breeze coming off the lake, one that made the blue and pink spectra-dyed skirts of her dress flutter around her legs, and she rubbed her bare arms a little to fight the chill that was setting in.

“You want to freeze?” Her husband questioned with a small scowl, as he placed his black jacket over her shoulders before leaning against the railing next to her, staring out to the horizon.

“Wouldn’t it solve a lot of your problems if I did?” she asked stiffly. “You’d be a widower. You could escape.”

“If it solved my problems, I would have killed you during the many chances I’ve had,” he drawled out.

“Glad to know you care.” She removed the jacket and set it on the railing between the two of them.

“Still mad about the contraceptives, I presume?”

“It wasn’t about the contraceptives, it was about the fact that you kept them a secret!” she corrected irritably. “If you’d told me, I would have helped you keep up the lie. I wouldn’t betray you.”

“All you talked about was giving your father what he wanted,” he narrowed his eyes. “I’m sorry I didn’t believe you changed like _that,_ ” he snapped his fingers on ‘that’.

“You knew I had growing reservations about it,” she pointed out, turning away from him. “There were a lot of things I was reconsidering because of you.”

Anakin grew quiet and kept staring ahead, the beauty of Varykino soothing a lot of things on his temper, but it was incapable of hiding the blood on his hands, the scars that his soul held and how little he felt of his old self. “Everything’s different.”

“It is,” she agreed quietly, picking at her nails. “I _am_ sorry, Anakin. If I had known what he would make you do, I never would have…”

He stiffened. “It was not hard to guess, Padmé, he’s a Sith. What did you think he would do? He would keep me in the Palace, as a decoration? He wanted a person to kill for him. He found that in me and he found that it was the easiest way to take my soul away, so he didn’t waste any time in putting his plans into action. He took my free will, my soul, and any hope I might have had to go back home.”

“Do you honestly—” she stopped and shook her head. “You’re right. I was wrong. I have been wrong about so many things in my life because it was easy, but that doesn’t mean I don’t regret it.”

“Good for you, although gaining a conscience after so many years is not worth a lot. Everything is already destroyed, he made sure of it.” Sighing, he dropped his head into his hands, fingers tugging at the roots of his hair.

“Maybe it doesn’t have to be,” she said quietly.

“What can you _possibly_ do right now?” He snapped at her, turning so he could face her. “Honestly, tell me what the kriff do you think is salvageable at this moment? Huh?”

“Could you shield my mind?”

He was taken aback. “Yes.” He confirmed, frowning. “Why is that?”

“Because I’m finally ready to do something. And I don’t want him to know that I am.”

Anakin sighed and stood silently for a few minutes. “It’s not complicated and people who are genuinely strong-minded can keep their minds trained to avoid leaks of information. I can teach you one or two things. Just so you don’t get killed.”

“Thank you.” Her hand trailed over the railing to find his, gently squeezing his fingers. “There was one other thing I wanted to ask.”

He looked at her hand over his and sighed. “What is it?” He asked quietly.

“Will you please make love to me?”

His head snapped up to look at her, wondering if he had heard right. “What?” He whispered.

“I want to make love,” she repeated softly. “No toys, no kinks, nothing like that. Just us.”

It would be something they had never done and they had been married for five months. All their marital activities, except for that first night, had been intense, rough, filled with toys, plays, and scenes, but this… this was something they had never done. 

And even though he knew he should’ve stepped back and said ‘no’ because Sidious had used those brewing feelings for her against him and he had decided that pushing his wife away was the best course of action, Anakin stepped forward. Maybe he could at least feel this moment before he was stripped of his emotions fully. He felt himself fall deeper and deeper into a black hole, with no light, no love, no care. He was becoming immune to feeling, and it was terrifying. 

But when he kissed her, it was like fire in his veins, a light in the darkness and he sighed, leaning into her and wrapping his arms around her waist. She moaned into his mouth, deepening the kiss as her hands cupped his face and she pressed her body against his.

The sweetness of the moment hurt because Anakin knew it couldn't last. 

He couldn't allow himself to fall deeper in love with her, because Sidious would exploit that feeling until he had it twisted and broken and attached to the worst of memories. Anakin never thought he would feel something for her. Not the way they had begun. But all they had was each other, and he saw a part of Padmé that he hadn't known existed. The way she took care of him after every training, how she trembled in anger over what her father did to him. Even now, even when he was being despicable and she had discovered his lie, she still took him out of Sidious’ toxic grasp.

"Right here?" He nuzzled her cheek as he pressed her against the railing, the only sounds were their breathing and the soothing waves of the lake. 

“Right here,” she confirmed, jumping up slightly so that she was sitting on the stone. Reaching down, she pulled her skirts out of the way and wrapped her legs around his waist.

He kissed the corner of her lips, her jawline, down to her slender neck until he was brushing over her cleavage. The thin straps of her dress slipped down her arms, exposing more soft white flesh as she tipped her head back, keening under his touch. Using the Force, he undid the ties that laced his trousers as his lips worked on her flesh and his hands held her firmly by the waist. 

“Anakin,” she chanted his name in his ear with the same reverence used in prayer. “Anakin, Anakin, Anakin.”

One of his hands slipped underneath the skirts to push her undergarments aside so he could sheath himself inside of her, slowly, gently, letting her warmth be wrapped sweetly around him. Anakin groaned as he was fully inside of her, kissing her lips passionately. Her legs pulled him towards her, taking him in deeper as her hips rocked back and forth against him. Gasping against her mouth, he moaned, pulling her bottom lip with his teeth. " _Padmé._ "

“Say it again,” she whimpered. “Please, I love it when you say my name.”

He thrust into her, groaning, "Padmé," he breathed, pulling out until only the tip of his head was inside of her before thrusting into her again. "You always feel so good. So good."

“I’m close,” she exhaled, clinging to his neck. “Please…”

He picked up his pace, lips nipping at the skin of her neck as his breathing became ragged. "Let go for me." She obeyed, spilling with a strangled cry of pleasure as she buried her face in his chest and held him tightly. Anakin grunted as he spilled inside of her, feeling his own climax hit, thrusting slower and slower so they could both ride out their pleasure together. As she began to settle, she hummed, her fingers twisting into his hair as her muscles relaxed in the afterglow of the moment.

“I think,” she said slowly, “that was as close to a perfect moment as I’ve ever known.”

He chuckled. "Yeah, me too," he ran his hands up and down her back. "It's a shame we can't stay here forever. This would be a nice place to live," he sighed. 

“It would,” she agreed, one of her hands drifting down to finger the japor snippet resting on her breastbone. “Everything else melts away, and there’s just beauty here. Beauty and us.”

Anakin nodded, pulling back to kiss her cheek. "If nothing else, at least we'll always have this moment." She nodded slowly, eyes shining as she looked up at him and pulled him close for another kiss.

* * *

“Padmé?” Sabé knocked on the door of the master fresher. “Do you need any supplies? It’s that time again.”

Padmé already knew it was that time again. She’d been staring at her toilet for an hour as she’d counted the days and counted again. “I’m fine,” she called through the door. “Just put out a dress for me, something simple, and then take the day off.”

It had been roughly five weeks since she and Anakin had returned from their impromptu visit to Varykino. Five weeks since they’d first had sex without him using the contraceptives. She’d been vaguely aware of the consequences of such things, but a part of her had still doubted the possibility.

There wasn’t any doubt now.

“Are you sure, Padmé?” Sabé insisted, worried. “You haven’t been feeling well, we would rather stay with you.”

Padmé sighed and moved to open the door. “Get the others, bring them in here,” she instructed.

Sabé did as she was told and within minutes, all of Padmé’s handmaidens were reunited around her, glancing at each other worriedly. ”What is it?” Saché pressed.

“What I tell you can’t leave this room,” Padmé informed them as she retrieved a simple red dress with long sleeves that could be folded up into a hood and started to change into it. “Do you understand?”

“You know we would never betray you,” Dormé said.

“We’ll always have your back,” Yané confirmed.

“I don’t need any supplies. I won’t for at least another seven months,” the princess revealed grimly. “I’m finally pregnant.”

All the handmaidens hesitated. Padmé’s tone of voice was not one of celebration and her face did not show it either.

“Why do I feel unsure about congratulating you?” Eirtaé sighed.

“This is all you ever wanted, aren’t you… happy?” Dormé questioned, moving over to twist Padmé’s hair into a loose braid.

“I think I will be,” Padmé answered slowly, “but I need to talk with my father first.”

“Would you like us to escort you?” Sabé asked as she took Padmé’s hand and squeezed. 

“Or call Anakin?” Yané offered. “You both need this joy in your lives, after everything you’ve been going through.”

“No!” Padmé blurted out. “No, I have to do this alone. And Anakin _can’t_ know about this. Not yet. All of you need to stay here, wait for the 501st. Promise me you will.”

“We promise,” Sabé said slowly. “You are scaring us, though. We always thought this would be a joyful moment, it’s all you’ve talked about. Having a baby with Anakin.”

“The future of the galaxy rests with me now.” Padmé placed her hand on her abdomen. “I will do what’s right for all of us, but you need to trust me.”

“We will do whatever you need us to do,” Dormé said.

“Then stay here like I told you.” Padmé moved towards the door, pausing to take a deep breath and look back at her handmaidens. “I want you to know that I love you all dearly.”

“We love you too,” Eirtaé said. “All of us. We would die for you.”

“I hope that you never have to do so.” The princess left, making her way down the halls to her father’s apartments and entering without knocking. “Father?”

“What brings you to my private chambers?” Her father set down the cup of the tea he had been drinking. “Shouldn’t you be frolicking around with the rest of the women?”

She ignored the barb and sat down across from him, hands folded neatly in her lap. “I’ve been ill lately. Not in the mood for frolicking”

“Ill, you say?” He raised his eyebrows at her. “I hope it’s a type of illness that will bless the Empire, my dear.”

“I would need to consult a medical droid to be certain, but I believe Anakin and I will be parents soon, yes,” she said neutrally. “Do you know when my husband will be returning from this latest mission you’ve given him?”

A wide, wicked smile grew on his face. “Those are indeed joyful news. I had begun to lose hope you were even able to conceive,” he said, sounding delighted. “Oh, he’ll be back in a few short hours.”

“I see.” She nodded. “I hope you’ll allow me to tell him in person.”

“I guess I can grant you that one thing, after all, you are carrying my heir,” he sipped on his tea. “You have finally done me proud, daughter. I knew all it would take was for me to strip that boy of his soul, for him to not care anymore and give me what I wanted.”

She nearly corrected him. But the memory of that night on the terrace was too precious. “I hope there is enough of his soul left that he will be a good father to this child. As you have always been to me.”

“That child will have one father and that will be me. The boy was a means to an end and he has done it. He’s far too imperfect, he would teach the child the wrong things,” Sheev said calmly. Padmé’s eyes flickered to the display on the mantle, where the lightsaber hilts of his fallen Apprentices sat.

“Then I suppose Anakin’s lightsaber will soon join those. Or shall I hold it in keeping for my child?”

“It’s just one more. The last one. I will have what I always needed soon,” his eyes flickered to her flat stomach and his gaze grew in intensity. “No need for a medical droid, daughter, you are definitely carrying a child already strong in the Force. His father’s son. My Apprentice will have a worthy lightsaber.”

“Father,” Padmé wet her lips. “I understand that Vader has to die. For the good of the Empire. But perhaps you could leave the execution itself to me?”

“No. You’re weak. You’re _in love_ with him,” Sheev hissed, his yellow eyes glowing. “Or do you think I haven’t realized it?”

“I’m fond of him,” she conceded quickly. “He’s an amusing playmate. But I am loyal to the Empire above all else. This pregnancy has only happened because I discovered he was taking steps to prevent it and I eliminated them. I can do what needs to be done.”

“Your passion for the Empire is moving, but it’s not as great as it is for the boy,” he said disgustedly. “Don’t worry.” He paused. “He felt the same. Once. Before I made him see what a terrible choice it would be to love you. It’s why Luminara Unduli, along with so many of her brethren, is dead. Why he became Darth Vader.”

The revelation made her heart stop for a moment that seemed to last forever. “You shouldn’t toy with me like that, Father. It’s not good for my health, or the baby’s.”

“The child will be fine. You and your husband have completed your mission, and in a few months, will no longer be of any use to me.”

“You’re growing soft in your old age,” Padmé said calmly, and as she spoke, the lightsabers on the mantle began to rock back and forth. “From where I stand, you’re the one who has outlived his use.”

Sheev stiffened as he turned to look at the mantle. “Your childish, pathetic tricks are worthless now, Padmé. Let’s not do something you regret. I have no trouble putting you in stasis until that child is ready to be ripped from your body.”

“What I regret,” she whispered, the majority of her energy concentrated in one final, desperate wave of power, “is that I have let you coddle me and shelter me and mold me into a useless thing for so many years. All my life, you’ve found me unworthy. But I am exactly the heir you deserve.” One of the black striped hilts of Asajj Ventress flew into her hand as the other lightsabers scattered across the floor. “Tell me, Father, have you ever heard the Tragedy of Darth Sidious the Arrogant?”

He stood up, determined to render her unconscious and carry out his threat of putting her in stasis. “I’ve had enough of your whining!”

“And I have had enough of you!” The lightsaber flared to life in her hands as she rose to face him. “You won’t touch Anakin, nor take this child! They’re _mine!”_

* * *

He felt less and less like himself. Every mission chipped away some part of him. He could barely feel anything but hate or anger. Anakin couldn’t remember what it felt like to feel love, caring or peace. It was turning him into a droid. An emotionless killing machine.

“Sir?” Rex broke him out of his brooding with a clear of his throat.

“What is it?”

“You’re expected in the throne room, sir.”

Anakin sighed, dropping his shoulders. “The Emperor?”

“I don’t know who else it would be.”

 _True._ Nodding, Anakin took the path that would lead him to the throne room instead of the chambers he shared with Padmé. As he walked, he noticed that the palace somehow felt different. Every step was heavy and there had been a shift in the Force. He couldn’t put his finger exactly on what it was, but it definitely was different. Pushing the doors of the throne room open, he entered.

“Good, you’ve returned in one piece. There’s much we need to discuss.”


	9. In the End is My Beginning

“Good, you’ve returned in one piece,” Padmé rose from the throne and approached him with a tranquil smile on her face. “There’s much we need to discuss.”

"Padmé?" He looked around, confused. "Where's your father?" 

“He’s gone,” she promised, wrapping her arms around him tightly. “You don’t have to worry about him ever again.”

"Gone? What do you mean by that?" Anakin narrowed his eyes as he set an unsure hand on her waist. 

“I mean that I killed him,” she whispered. “It took all the strength I had in the Force and everything you taught me, but I did it, Anakin.”

He stared down at her, shocked. It explained the difference in the Force, Sidious was gone. He thought he would feel lighter but he didn't, he still felt trapped, without a way out. Whatever was left of Sidious’ presence in the Force was still clawing at him. "What? Why?" He shook his head confused. "How?" 

“You might want to sit down,” she advised, guiding him onto the steps. One of her hands covered his, keeping it on her stomach. “You remember how I’ve been feeling sick for the last week?”

Anakin was staring at her stomach. "Oh."

“I know,” she whispered, “and I knew that once he found out, he’d kill you, I couldn’t let that happen.”

"Padmé… What now?" 

“Now,” she paused, glancing back at the throne. “Now, I’m Empress. I have the chance to do something right. To do everything right.” She lifted her hand from his. “There’s going to be time for the ritual observations of mourning and the like before my coronation. It should be enough time for us to see about an amicable divorce. I,” she swallowed, “I assume that’s what you want.”

He was shocked. He never thought those words would leave her lips. "This is too much for me to process. I… I don't know what to do right now, I'm…" he shook his head and removed his hand from her stomach. "I need some time."

“We have time,” Padmé promised softly. “But it’s going to be better now, Anakin. No matter what happens, you’ll never have to answer to him again.”

"It's not that simple. What he did… What he made me do… It doesn't go away like that."

“I know. But he can’t make you do anything else now. He’s gone. You can at least start to heal.”

"Do you know the Jedi that died?" He asked quietly. "Because of me? Because of what  _ he  _ made of me? The blood that is on my hands and the lives that were lost? Him being gone is not going to change that," he argued. "Healing is not that easy."

“I never said it was. But you have a chance now that you didn’t have it before.” She got to her feet, smoothing down her dress. For a moment, her hands lingered at her abdomen. “I have to finish writing my address to the Galaxy tonight announcing his death and my ascension. I won’t mention you, or the baby.”

He nodded, silently thankful for that. "You could add that I am no longer a Sith, that Vader died with him."

“I’ll have a draft for you to review before dinner,” Padmé promised.

"No, I know you’ll do it right."

“I’ll certainly try.” Her fingers briefly trailed over his cheek. “Will I see you at dinner?”

Anakin nodded. "Yes."

“Good.” She looked away, biting her lip. “Good, I’ll see you then.”

* * *

_ “It is with a heavy heart that I must announce the passing of my father, the first Galactic Emperor, Sheev Palpatine. He leaves behind a legacy that spans to the furthest reaches of our galaxy, and it is with a heavy heart that I shoulder that legacy now as his sole heir. I do not doubt that there are difficult times ahead, and I ask your cooperation in this period of transition with the promise that I will hear all political suits once I have ascended the throne in full. This invitation is extended even to those who were considered fugitives under my father’s reign—” _

The transmission could have continued speaking, but Ahsoka muted the commlink, only letting the visual keep playing. Dressed in a black dress with a high leather neck and a thin veil over her face, the Princess— no, the  _ Empress  _ looked perfectly somber and contrite, but what she was saying sounded laughable. “Master Yoda, what does this all mean for the Jedi? For the galaxy?” she asked the little green Grand Master. “Can we trust her word?”

“In time, we will see, if to her, trust can be given,” Yoda replied serenely.

“What about Anakin?” Obi-Wan asked quietly. “Where does he stand in all of this?” Anakin Skywalker has been a forbidden subject in Rebel bases, ever since the former Emperor baptized him with a new name and position. Darth Vader was not dear to anyone, not since Luminara’s death, over four months ago.

“If sincere, the Empress is, over, the hunting of Jedi might be,” Yoda mused, running his hand over the whorls and knots of his cane’s handle. “Fallen, he has not, though Vader he is called. Not truly, no.”

“This might be our chance, Master Kenobi,” Ahsoka said hopefully. “We can save him. We promised him that. He has to know we haven’t turned our backs on him.”

“Volunteer, do you, to journey to the Capitol?”

“Yes, of course,” Ahsoka replied in a heartbeat. “I owe my Master this. I owe him the chance to save himself and if  _ she  _ is being honest, we have to believe she will let him go. I believe in Master Yoda, he has not fallen. We still have time!”

“Go with her, you will, Obi-Wan,” the Grand Master ordered. “See for yourself, the fate of your old Apprentice. Do what must be done.”

Obi-Wan looked unsure. He was guilty of slowly losing faith in Anakin. Hearing about the terrible actions of Darth Vader had broken his heart. It had been his fault, he had let Anakin fall into Sidious’ hands, knowing well enough his Padawan would be easy prey to the Dark Side.

“Master Kenobi?” Ahsoka prompted. “Please. We can’t give up on him.”

“I need to find his lightsaber,” Obi-Wan said finally. “Whether it’s to save him or to do as he asked, I need to bring the lightsaber with us.”

Ahsoka smiled. “Don’t worry, Master, I have a feeling we won’t need to resort to aggressive negotiations.”

“All the same. I made him a promise. And I will keep it if I have to.”

* * *

“ _ Vader…” the voice hissed in his ear.  _

_ “You’re dead. She killed you.” _

_ “But you know I remain in you. My Apprentice.” Sidious cackled and the lightning began to surge. “As long as my House exists, you are bound to it.” _

_ “No. No, I refuse to follow your teachings. I am no longer bound to you.” _

_ “Anakin?” Padmé’s voice drifted in and out of focus. _

_ “You are bound to  _ her _. It is because of her that Anakin Skywalker is gone and Darth Vader lives.” _

_ Anakin groaned. “You’re dead. You’re dead and Darth Vader is gone. I am not Darth Vader. I am not. I’m not him. I’m not a monster.” _

_ “Oh, but you are. And soon enough, you’ll see.” _

_ In the distance, Padmé stopped calling his name, whimpering in pain. He could see her now, clawing at her neck, her swollen body wracked with spasms. _

Anakin sat up in the bed, gasping for air as his body was covered in a thin layer of sweat. A nightmare. It was a nightmare. It couldn’t be real, Sidious was dead. He was gone.

“Anakin?” Padmé appeared in the doorway, luminescent in a white silk robe. “I could hear you from the master bedroom, is everything alright?”

“Yes, it was just a dream,” he whispered, the image of her clutching at her throat in pain, fully pregnant with their child, as he choked her life away still burnt in his brain. “I’m sorry I disturbed you.”

“Do you want to tell me about it?” she asked quietly, not moving from where she stood. “You look awful. Like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“No, no, I don’t… I don’t want to speak, I might take a shower and try to sleep again,” he moved back into the bed, wincing.

“Alright.” She started to turn away, then stopped. “I’m meeting with someone tomorrow. I’d like it if you were there too.”

“I am not the best political advisor,” he whispered in a sigh. “I can’t help you, not right now. I’m sorry.”

“This meeting is personal, not political,” she corrected. “I said I wouldn’t be dealing with politics until after the mourning period and the coronation, remember?”

“Oh, right, yes. I just… I’m tired, but I’ll be there tomorrow.”

“Alright.” Padmé nodded. “I’ll have the kitchen send you some hot chocolate, for when you get out of the shower. I know it helps you sleep. I’ll see you in the morning. Good night.”

“Good night, Padmé,” he whispered, worrying his bottom lip as guilt and shame filled him. 

The nightmare was so real. He wished it was just something inside his head, a fear, but the truth was, Anakin knew what he was capable of. 

He’d told her he didn’t want to consider having a baby while Sidious lived. And now that Sidious was gone… he was afraid he was too far gone, too much like him, to be able to raise an innocent life. Just like he wasn’t willing to submit a baby to Sidious, he was not going to be the reason his child grew up scared and sheltered, the same way Sidious did to Padmé.

Oh, he wished he had been overjoyed with the news, but when she’d told him, when he’d realized she carried their child, he felt nothing but emptiness and fear. That was not how a father should feel. Anakin wanted to be happy. Desperately so. He did. He promised he did… he let out a strangled whimper and sniffed as he realized he didn’t feel happy. He didn’t feel  _ anything.  _ It would only grow worse. Sidious was dead and he thought he would feel better, but he was falling deeper and deeper in despair.

* * *

Padmé sat at the head of the conference table, fiddling with the buttons on the cuffs of her sleeves. Anakin hadn’t been at breakfast. And now he was late, along with the guests she was expecting. In the empty stretches, her father’s voice echoed in her head.

_ You’re weak. You’re in love with him. _

_ Your passion for the Empire is moving, but it’s not as great as it is for the boy, _

_ He felt the same. Once. Before I made him see what a terrible choice it would be to love you.  _ In her hands, she turned the japor snippet over and over, looking at the delicate carving and imperfections of the wood.

“A terrible choice indeed,” she whispered to herself bitterly.

Someone cleared their throat, breaking her out of her thoughts and she looked up to see Cody standing awkwardly in front of her. 

“Your majesty, the guests that you were expecting have arrived,” he announced. “Also… Captain Rex has asked me to pass you a message. Apparently, the Supreme Commander wasn’t feeling well this morning and overslept. He’ll be late for the meeting but Captain Rex assures me that he’ll be present.”

“Good, good, please show them in,” Padmé agreed distractedly. “Thank you, Cody.”

Saluting, Cody left the room, and shortly after, Ahsoka Tano and Obi-Wan Kenobi entered, looking defensive, suspicious, but still with that eerily Jedi sense of calm. 

“Your majesty,” Obi-Wan inclined his head. “Thank you for receiving us.”

“Indeed, it was very…. generous of you,” Ahsoka added, a bit more unsure than the Jedi Master at her side. Her dark blue eyes scanned the room as if she was looking for something.  _ Someone _ .

“Thank you for agreeing to come. Anakin should be here soon,” Padmé promised, nodding her head in respect to both of them. “He’s been exhausted lately.”

“Your father sent him on quite a lot of missions before his passing,” Obi-Wan said with nonchalance. “It is expected, I assume.”

“I don’t condone what my father did to him, if that’s what you’re suggesting.”

“Forgive Master Kenobi’s coldness, he can be like that sometimes,” Ahsoka interjected. “It has been complicated for us, as you might imagine. Your father used the face and strength of a friend, a brother, and a good warrior to take innocent lives and as much as we care for Anakin… it’s a struggle. For all of us.”

“That’s why you’re here.” Padmé set the japor snippet down on the table, reaching for her datapad. “Whether or not Anakin admits it, I recognize that I can’t do anything to help him except let him go. To be with people who  _ can _ help him.”

Obi-Wan observed with caution. “What about the child?” He stroked his beard, raising one eyebrow. Ahsoka snapped her head around to look at him, shocked. “You should have noticed, little one,” he observed.

“He doesn’t want it,” admitted Padmé. “He would never say it to my face, but I know it’s the truth. And I’m not going to force him to be anything he doesn’t want to be. Not anymore. When he gets here, I’ll be reiterating the offer I’ve already made him for an amicable divorce. I’m hoping you can convince him to take it.”

“Of course he wants it,” Ahsoka blurted out. “Anakin is the most fatherly person I know. He  _ loves  _ children. That doesn’t make sense!”

“Ahsoka,” Obi-Wan placed a hand on her shoulder. “He’s changed,” he said calmly. “We don’t know what Darth Sidious has done to him.”

Ahsoka looked horrified as she stared between Obi-Wan and Padmé. “He’s not like that,” she whispered.

“Maybe one day he will want a baby with someone, Ahsoka, but it won’t be me,” the Empress predicted grimly. “I’ve done too much damage for that to ever be possible.”

“I know the Dark Side is scarring. I know,” Ahsoka admitted, taking a step forward. “But I also know my Master and maybe right now he needs time. He needs to heal because I have no idea what your father… Darth Sidious has done to him. He might not want or think he doesn’t want the baby right now, but I know Anakin Skywalker. I know my Skyguy and I know this won’t be forever.”

“Ahsoka…”

“No, Master Kenobi,” Ahsoka snapped. “I don’t know what happened between the both of you, but, you care for him, don’t you?” She spoke directly to Padmé. “If you didn’t, we wouldn’t be here. You wouldn’t be asking us to basically  _ save  _ Anakin from the darkness.”

“It’s because I care for him that I know I can’t keep him here,” Padmé confirmed. “And there’s nothing in the divorce agreement that denies him the chance to see the baby in the future.”

“You’re keeping it?” Obi-Wan asked in surprise.

“After a significant amount of consideration, yes. I want this child.”

“And you’re letting Anakin go,” he said thoughtfully. “I believed I knew who you were but… you keep surprising me, your majesty.”

“I’ve changed as much as he has.”

“We’ll take care of him,” Obi-Wan assured her.

“I know you will. While we’re waiting for him, we might as well discuss business, at least a little. I intend to exonerate the Jedi.”

“You were telling the truth in your speech,” Ahsoka beamed.

“You’re that determined to be different from your father?” Obi-Wan questioned.

“I’m determined to give my child a better galaxy than the one my father gave me. One where peace and justice are achieved through diplomacy and cooperation rather than bloodshed and conniving.”

“Then there’s still hope,” he said.

“Hey, maybe you can tell her about the New Order of the Jedi you’ve been thinking about,” Ahsoka quipped and Obi-Wan gave her a glare.

“You’re working on ideas for a New Order?” Padmé asked, looking at Obi-Wan in surprise.

“Ideas that are thought in times where hope disappears and we want to think that a better future is ahead of us,” Obi-Wan replied. “I know where the Order was flawed. I thought about how we could correct it. Many of the ideas, really, came from Anakin when he ranted about everything that was wrong with being a Jedi whenever he got pissed off at me.”

“I would be very interested in seeing what you’ve come up with, Master Kenobi.”

“Pad—” Anakin’s voice died when he entered the conference room. His eyes widened as he took a step back, realizing why the Force had been sizzling around him. He didn’t want to believe it, and he didn’t want to hope, but his Master and his Padawan were standing there. Right there. No, no, he didn’t have the right to call them Master and Padawan, he had lost that right the night Luminara had sacrificed herself to him. “Wh—” He let out a ragged breath as he felt momentarily lightheaded. 

“Skyguy.” Ahsoka rushed out of her seat and hugged him tightly. “It’s really you,” she sobbed.

Slowly, he wrapped his arms around her. “Snips…” he whispered. “I’m so sorry,” he said into her temple. 

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” she mumbled, still hugging him.

“No,” his voice was so broken. “No, it’s not.”

“But it can be,” Padmé interjected quietly. “Anakin, I’m going to ask you the same thing I did after I told you my father was dead. Do you want to end our marriage?”

He looked torn as he glanced between the three people in the room. Shame was coursing through his veins as he glanced at Obi-Wan and Ahsoka, replaced with regret when it came to Padmé. “I don’t know,” he whispered. “I don’t know anything anymore.”

She bit her lip, holding back the questions she’d wanted to ask him ever since that day when she’d killed her father.  _ Is it true? Did you love me? Could you do it again?  _ “Then I think it’s for the best if I’m no longer a part of your life.” The words weighed heavily on her tongue. “I’ve already caused you enough trouble.”

“What brought on this decision?” Anakin asked bluntly. She was messing with his head, making the very ground he walked on shaky. “You would shout to whoever wanted to hear you that I was yours, and now that you are Empress, that you are pregnant, it’s suddenly irrelevant and you want me gone?”

_ If only you knew how much I want you to stay.  _ “You clearly aren’t happy here, and what I’ve done to you was wrong—”

“ _ Really? _ ” He shouted, making Ahsoka take a step back and Obi-Wan a step forward. “ _ Now,  _ you realize I am not happy? That what you’ve done, what your father has done is wrong? Really?” Padmé winced under his gaze, not saying a word in her defense.

“Anakin, calm down,” Obi-Wan said, clearly trying to pacify his former student. “We’re all here to help you.”

“You want to help me?” Anakin hissed.

“We all do,” Ahsoka said softly. “You’re not okay, Skyguy.”

“You both know what I’ve done, what are you even doing here?” He scowled. “You should be in another system. Another  _ galaxy.  _ Far,  _ far  _ away from me.”

“We know that you did what you had to in order to survive. And we know that you’ve resisted Falling to the Dark Side, despite everything he made you do.”

“What has made you so sure I haven’t fallen?” Anakin challenged. “You don’t know who I am anymore.”

“Maybe, but we know who you’re meant to be.” Ahsoka reached over and took a lightsaber from the clip on Obi-Wan’s belt. Anakin’s old lightsaber. “Come back with us. Please, Skyguy. Master. Please.”

Anakin blinked away the tears as he saw his old lightsaber. It felt like it had been years since their goodbyes on Alderaan. “I…” he raised his eyes to Padmé.

_ What about you? Our baby? _

The image of Padmé’s swollen body dangling a few meters above the ground, clutching at her throat, gasping for air, because he had given in to the Dark Side made him freeze as he took a step back, closing his eyes and watched her fall, lifeless, to the ground.  _ If I stay, I’ll be like him. But if I go…  _ “Okay,” he said in a whisper. “I’ll go.”  _ … I’ll be giving her and that child up. _ Panic consumed him as the images flashed in his brain.  _ It’s for the best. It’s for the best. It’s to save them both. From me. _

“You’ll need to sign this, then.” She held out the datapad. “I had the palace attorneys draw it up.”

He nodded, numbly, as he took the datapad, signing it as she had told him. “Padmé, I…”  _ I want to tell you why. I want to explain myself. I want to say I’m sorry I’m no longer the man that could be the father that child deserves. _

“There’s a clause in there allowing for you to visit. If you ever change your mind and want to be in the baby’s life,” she said, looking away from him and back at the japor snippet on the table. “If. It’s not compulsory.”

Anakin nodded.  _ One day. Maybe.  _ “Thank you.”

“I wish you luck, Anakin.”

“You’re going to do great things,” he said quietly. “Good things. I know you’re capable of it.”

“I’ll try to live up to your expectations.” She gave him a weak smile. “Goodbye.”

“Goodbye, Padmé.”

Obi-Wan put a comforting hand on his shoulder. “Let’s go home, Anakin. It’s finally over.”

* * *

“Why did you accept me back, Master Yoda?” Anakin asked softly. “You are aware of my actions.” He had been back for three standard weeks and he knew the looks, heard the whispers, felt the judgment and hatred from many. “Everyone else is. They don’t want me here.”

“Spoke with Luminara, I did.” Yoda looked past Anakin to the swampy landscape surrounding him. “Felt her through the Force, yes, as she passed. Told me, she did, of what she saw. All to bring us to this moment. The truth, I have known.”

Anakin was quiet for a long time. “I begged her to kill me. I wish she had.”

“For all of us, her choice was. For the Order. For the Galaxy. Invalidate her sacrifice, would you?”

“What of the others that died, trying to fight me?” He asked miserably. “I did my best, Master. I did my best to not engage. To do something. To warn them but they… they hated me. They were so bent on revenge for Luminara, they didn’t see my signs. Now they’re dead. Because of me.”

“Changed all of us, this war has. A terrible price for survival, it is,” Yoda agreed. “But survived, we have. And now, many futures, there are.”

“I can’t see my future. The Force is so divided with me… I don’t know what I’m meant to do anymore. Sidious is dead. I’m not even the one who accomplished that. It sort of annuls my purpose in this world.”

“If not you, then who ended the Sith?”

“Someone that is actually a lot braver than I am. I bowed my head and accepted the punishment.” He took a deep breath. “She didn’t,” he whispered, somewhat proudly.

“Would she have done so, if not for you?” Yoda prompted.

“For her child, she would.”

“Is the child not also yours?” The old Jedi leaned back and hummed to himself. “Uncertain the future is now. Destroyed, Sidious is, but balance, is that? More, there may be for you. This, only the Force knows.” 

“I think he destroyed the thing in me that could love. I’m afraid I won’t love anyone else again. Not even my child,” Anakin confessed and part of him felt relieved of saying those words out loud. “That's why I left. Sidious still whispers in my ear at night. I wake up with nightmares. So many dead. At my hands.  _ Her _ included.”

“Stay here, you may. Or go elsewhere. Find you, we can, if needed you are. But free, you are, Master Skywalker.”

“Master?” He asked, surprised.

“Sacrificed much for the Order, you have. Served the Galaxy like no other Jedi. A Master, you deserve to be.”

Anakin felt tears in his eyes. “I will try to honor the title to the best of my abilities, Master Yoda. I know, after what happened, I don’t deserve it.”

“Trust in you, I do.” A gnarled green hand came to rest on Anakin’s shoulder. “Trust in yourself, you must find again.”

“I will, Master. I will. Thank you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We know how hard this week has probably been. We hope you are all safe, and that you are doing what you can to fight injustice. But we also know that it's a lot, emotionally speaking, so if our stories are the way you shut off your brain and go to your happy place, even for a little while, we're grateful for your readership.  
> Stay safe. Stay strong. Stay woke. We love you.  
> Black Lives Matter.  
> ✊🏿✊🏾✊🏽✊🏼✊🏻


	10. How to Go Back

He had forgotten how hot Tatooine was and it took him a while to get used to the heat again. And the sand. Ugh, the sand was the worst part of it all, but he had a purpose and he wouldn’t let the grains of sand stop him from it. Three months after leaving the Capitol behind, he knew he didn’t belong with the Alliance. There no longer _ was _ a Rebel Alliance. Padmé had pardoned the Jedi, negotiated with the Rebels, and peace had started to give people back their homes and the confidence to return to their families. Anakin knew he needed to do something for himself. Wallowing in self-pity and self-loathing all day was exhausting for him and everyone that surrounded him.

Kitster Banai was a childhood friend he never thought he would see again, but when he met him while he helped return the refugees to their homes, Kitster explained his mission. Save the slaves. From Tatooine. From Zygerria. Corellia. Anywhere slavery still existed. And in Kitster, Anakin found the answer. To be himself again or to have a sense of who he once was, he had to return to his roots. To Tatooine.

Apparently, by being Supreme Commander of the Imperial Forces, he had managed to put together a good sum of credits, enough to make him independent. He bought the hut where he had lived with his mother and Watto’s old shop. He cleaned it up, made it just like he always thought it should have been as a child, and started to work. To help others. Help slaves. He bought and freed the child slaves in Mos Espa, while Kitster and their friend, Amee, took them to loving homes across the Galaxy.

With time, he had a routine. Normalcy. With time, with a lot of meditation and focus, the nightmares and the whispers went away. He destroyed the Sith lightsaber. He trained with his Jedi lightsaber and it felt like an extension of his arm, something that the one Sidious had given him never did. With time, the voices in his head quieted down.

_ Crash. _

Anakin rolled from under the speeder he was fixing to see what had happened. 

“Oh dear, oh dear, what a mess.”

“Threepio, what did you do?”

In the middle of all the junk that Watto had in his shop, Anakin discovered the protocol droid he had started to help his mother around the house. He took the time to put him together and Kitster brought him a gold plating from Alderaan that suited him perfectly. How he gave the quirky personality to the droid, Anakin would never know.

“Master Ani, how can you think that of me? Artoo-Detoo has bumped into my legs and made me break the nice vase Miss Amee brought with lunch.”

Anakin looked behind Threepio to look at the R2 unit Kitster had let him keep after a  _ lot  _ of begging. “Buddy?” Artoo beeped and whirled and Anakin snorted. “Innocent, my ass…” He mumbled, standing up. “Clean up the mess, Threepio. It’s not the end of the world.”

“Need some help with the droids?” a familiar voice came from the doorway.

Turning around, Anakin beamed and Threepio gasped in delight. “Master Tano, how lovely to see you again,” he proclaimed happily. “Look, Master Ani, it’s Master Tano.”

“I can see that, Threepio, thank you,” Anakin laughed. “Snips, you were due for your monthly visit anytime now. I was starting to think you were forgetting to check up on me,” he gave her a hug and a quick peck on the cheek.

“Being the youngest Master in the Order ever is a lot of work,” she said dramatically as she returned the hug. “But I had a pretty good teacher, so I’m handling it. You’re looking pretty good too. Though I’m guessing work’s been a lot easier since slavery was completely outlawed?”

“It definitely helped, but it hasn’t stopped people from trying to bend the law,” Anakin sighed. “You’re staying for dinner? Threepio’s cooking.”

“Of course I’m staying.” She reached into one of her vambraces, pulling out a holodisc. “I know you said you wouldn’t change your mind, but I’m trying again anyway. Like always.” Artoo wheeled closer, opening one of his ports to accept the disc in anticipation. “Are you sure you don’t want to see them?”

Anakin lost his smile as he was reminded of why Ahsoka visited as often as she did. Besides checking up on him, she kept badgering him about the Imperial Prince and Princess. Padmé’s twins. His twins. Their twins. Luke and Leia. “Ahsoka, we talked about this,” he whispered and turned around, taking the way back to the hut. “You know how I feel about this.” He felt horrible. That’s how he felt. He had abandoned his children. Walked out. Didn’t look back. When they were born, he felt them through the Force, and he had crumpled in on himself. The nightmare of Padmé’s death still burned into his brain. He had healed a lot since he left the Capitol, but the further away he got, the more he thought he could never return.

“Yeah, but it’s different now,” Ahsoka insisted. “Anakin, she’s… she’s getting married.”

He whirled around, almost knocking Threepio over. “To whom?” He demanded, far more offended than he should have been.

“Some Naboo aristocrat. Ian Lago.” Ahsoka answered. “I think it’s a political thing. Like she said yours was when people were asking her about the divorce. But Anakin, this means your kids are going to grow up thinking of someone else as their dad, how can you be okay with that?”

"I… I'm not necessarily okay with that, Ahsoka, but… I have no real authority, I walked away."

“She said you could come back! And if you ever actually  _ looked _ at the kriffing holos I brought, you’d know how much they’re your kids. It’s almost creepy how much they’re like you!” Ahsoka groaned.

"Ahsoka, you might not understand, but I struggle daily with the fact that they exist without me. But I don't know if I am capable of being their father. I have healed a lot ever since I left and I feel so much better, but what if I can't be what they need me to be?"

“That’s a bantha poodoo answer, because you  _ definitely _ can’t be what they need you to be if you keep hiding on this dustball of a planet for the rest of your life.”

Anakin opened and closed his mouth. "I'm not hiding," he mumbled. 

“It’s been  _ thirteen months _ since you left Coruscant. And ten months since you came back here. An entire kriffing year on the planet you swore you’d never come back to! The only reason I can possibly think of for why you’d want to stay here is if you were hiding.”

"I needed to return to my roots. I found a home here again, opening the shop, helping Amee and Kit with the slaves and the kids. It was what I needed. And don't get snippy with me. I am still your Master."

“We’re  _ both _ Masters now,” she reminded him, setting the disc down on the table. “But from where I’m sitting, you’re acting like a youngling.”

Anakin scoffed. "You traveled countless parsecs to yell at me? Say how I'm failing my children?" 

“No, you just want that to be what I’m saying, because it’s what you already think.” She stood, dusting herself off. “I’m gonna make a quick round of the city, say hi to people. I’ll be back for dinner.”

Her Master just stood, glaring at her as she left the hut. Kriff her and how well she knew him. He took the holodisc from the table and sighed. He purposely had no way to access the HoloNet, because he told himself it was better to be away from that. He didn't want to see her face… he didn't want to see his children… it would break him. Ahsoka didn't know how many times he had been ready to leave, only to be consumed by his fears and hide in his shop, working until exhaustion.

Luke and Leia. They were on this disc. He knew what would happen if he saw them. He knew. He knew and he was dreading this moment. "Artoo?" The astromech rolled forward, data port open and waiting. Sighing, he placed the disc inside, and a blue-tinted image sprang to life.

Padmé sat on the floor, a chubby dark-haired baby nestled in her arms while a blonde one tried to wriggle free from Eirtaé’s grip, fussing and waving their little fists.  _ “I think he wants his turn, milady.” _

_ “Oh, Luke, you can’t be patient for anything, can you?”  _ Padmé laughed, pushing back a few loose curls from her face. “ _ Just a few more minutes, my little prince.” _

Anakin lowered himself down, watching the holo with wide eyes. He had never heard her laugh so genuinely, happily. She was different. Motherhood suited her. 

In the recording, Padmé carefully passed the other baby - Leia, he realized - off to another handmaiden, one whose face was obscured, and took Luke from Eirtaé, placing him against her chest.  _ “There now, is that better?”  _ she asked, pulling her robe aside. Luke hummed, latching on her breast as his suckling could be heard. Padmé sighed contentedly, leaning over to kiss Leia on the forehead while Luke continued to nurse.

That was his family. A family he had walked away because of fear. A fear he clung to because it justified his actions but, in reality, it had dissipated. "I have to go back," Anakin realized out loud. “I have to go back,” he whispered again.

“Go where, Master Ani?” Threepio asked.

“Coruscant, Threepio. We’re all going to Coruscant.”

* * *

“My lady?” Padmé turned towards the sound of Sabé’s voice, the black hood of her dress falling as she did so. “Where were you?”

“Out.” The Empress rubbed her hands together, biting her lip. “Are the children awake? Do they need me?”

“They are, but—”

“Then nothing else really matters.” Padmé cut her off, brushing past her to head towards her suite and the nursery that adjoined it. In their crib, the twins were fussing but hadn’t started crying in full. She could tell by the way their little hands were clasped together and their faces were puckered that it was only a matter of time. “It’s okay, babies, Mamma’s here.”

Leia fussed and kicked her legs, tears shining in her eyes as she waved her arms towards her mother. Luke whimpered, smacking his lips together.

“What is it, are we hungry?” Padmé fumbled with the lacing of her dress, intent on stripping down as quickly as possible. “Or did we make a stinky? I can’t read your minds.” The lack of a smell suggested it would be the former.

“Do you need help, my lady?” Dormé asked from the doorway.

“Not with them right this second, but if you could fetch me a nightgown, that’d be appreciated,” Padmé answered as her dress fell to the ground. Leaning over the crib, she decided to pick Leia up first, cradling her daughter to her chest.

“I’ll be back with your nightgown,” her handmaiden said before leaving her alone with the twins again.

Leia rubbed her head against her mother’s chest, looking for the source of food she wanted. Padmé guided the little one towards her nipple, which had already started to leak at the sound of the twins’ unhappiness, and Leia got the hint, finally latching on. “There we go. Good girl.” Her daughter only gazed at her with big dark eyes, one little hand reaching up to play with the japor snippet that sat on the hollow of Padmé’s throat, as she happily suckled. 

A few tears slipped down Padmé’s cheeks. The twins had been endlessly fascinated with the necklace since they became old enough to register object permanence, and she couldn’t deny them their little obsession. It was the only connection they had to Anakin, at least until they were old enough to start being trained. “You’ll get this one day,” she promised softly.

Luke started sobbing, feeling left out and his cries grew louder. He was usually a quiet baby, however… he had a good set of lungs and he was not afraid to use them when he was unhappy. “Dormé, get a bottle along with the nightgown, please?” Padmé called in a panic. “Warm it up too.”

Her handmaiden rushed in, setting a nightgown on a nearby chair as she approached the crib to stare at a screaming Luke, red cheeks stained with tears. “Oh, we’re upset, little prince” Dormé smiled apologetically to Padmé. “When he wants to be heard, he is,” she commented amused as she set the bottle on the table to pick up Luke, who squirmed in her arms, mouth opening to let out another deafening cry. Dormé winced, rocking him back and forth, picking the bottle back up. “Shh, shh, I have your food,” she whispered as she placed the bottle at his lips. Luke sobbed and turned his head around, refusing the rubber tip. “Please, little one.”

In Padmé’s grasp, Leia sensed her brother’s unhappiness and began to shriek as well. Padmé winced and adjusted her hold so that she could support Leia with only one arm. “Give him to me.” She angled her free hand for Dormé to place her son next to his sister.

“Are you sure? I can try to sooth him while you finish with Leia,” Dormé said but at the same time, Luke turned his clear, blue eyes to his mother and whimpered, sniffing.

“He seems to want me,” Padmé pointed out as she moved closer. “And we have to give him what he wants, or they’ll both be up all night.”

Dormé sighed and carefully, placed Luke on his mother’s free arm and he quieted down. “Spoiled.” 

“Spoiled with love,” Padmé corrected, leaning down to kiss her son on the forehead. “Which is better than the way I was spoiled.” Luke cooed, his crying forgotten as he cuddled into his mother.

Dormé smiled. “Yes. Yes, it is.”

“Are we better now?” Padmé hummed to Luke as she carefully made her way to the nearest chair and settled into it. “Did you just miss me? Is that what made you sad?” He sighed, looking at her with rapid attention, a small, sweet smile tugging at his lips. “Oh, I missed you too. I miss both of you so much whenever I’m not with you.” Luke blinked, and she found herself falling into his fathomless blue eyes. His father’s eyes.

“I will never get tired of seeing you with them,” Dormé commented softly.

“I never imagined I could be responsible for anything as perfect as the two of them.”

“You are and they’ll be yours forever,” she beamed. “Oh, one thing,” she paused. “Ian asked for you.”

Padmé bit her lip. “Tell him I’m with the children. I’ll be there once I’ve gotten them back to sleep. And dressed.”

“I will. Will you just be wearing a nightgown to be bored to death?” Dormé asked with a fake smile plastered on her face.

“I’ll have a robe on too,” Padmé huffed. “And you need to stop talking about him like that. All of you do. I’m marrying him, you need to accept it and get used to it.”

“You can be a single mother and Empress. You don’t need a man. Especially one that barely works as a rebound. We all want your happiness. Lord of Boredom is not your happiness.” Dormé snorted.

“ _ Ian _ is going to be my consort,” the Empress reminded her handmaiden coldly. “He will help me shoulder the burdens of ruling, and he is the only man I’ve met in all these months who is willing to be a father to children who aren’t his. I’m doing what is best for my Empire and my children. He’ll give us stability.”

Dormé raised one eyebrow. “There’s one thing that can change your mind. What if it happens?”

Padmé’s grip on her children tightened. “It  _ won’t _ happen.”

“You don’t know,” Dormé said in a sing-song voice. “I will let Lord Lago know you’ll meet him soon,” she smirked. “Good night, your majesty.”

“Good night, Dormé.”

* * *

“While I am happy to see you again, sir, I do not think this is a good idea.” Rex cleared his throat, shifting awkwardly.

Anakin licked his lips and bounced on the balls of his feet. He had managed to arrive in Coruscant without a lot of fuss. Just Ahsoka talking his ear off the entire trip, but they arrived late in the evening and Obi-Wan received them at the New Order’s Temple. His former Master had wanted to show him how things had changed but Anakin had one goal. To meet his children. Preferably, without Padmé. He needed… he needed to know, to make sure he could connect to them. To love them. He needed to see them without the weight of Padmé’s presence but it meant that he had to sneak into the new Imperial Palace. “Rex, please, this means a lot to me.”

“I don’t blame you at all, sir. It’s the sneaking around that doesn’t sit right with me.”

“It’s not like I am going to harm anyone. Please, I just want to see the twins.”

“If you’re not going to be harming anyone, why sneak around?” Rex shook his head. “Never mind. I know better than to argue with you. Are you ready to go?”

“Yes, and I have my reasons. They might be silly, but I have to do this,” he whispered.

“Not stopping you, sir. Come on. Nursery’s this way.” Rex gestured for Anakin to follow him. “Do you need any briefing on the little tykes before you meet them?”

Anakin looked amused. “I would like to, yes. What can you tell me about them?”

“Well, they can’t crawl yet, but they wriggle like they want to. Basically always getting carried by their mum or one of the handmaidens. They like Sabé best out of the lot, probably because of the resemblance,” Rex listed. “And they’re hungry little things. Sometimes the Empress holds court with them on her lap and she’ll wear a cloak so she can nurse them without anyone seeing.”

“She was always great at multitasking,” Anakin chuckled. As they grew nearer to the nursery, he felt more and more their presence in the Force. A presence he always felt but never acknowledged out of sheer stubbornness and fear of failing.

“They’ve got some lungs on them too. If either one gets mad, you can hear it halfway across the palace. Leia does it more often, but Luke’s louder.”

“It seems like they bring a lot of noise to your lives,” he smiled softly, feeling a pang of guilt inside of him. “This Palace,” he looked around the hallways. “It’s different from the one before. It’s…” he breathed in, “...lighter.”

“The Empress said something similar. She bought the property about a month after her coronation, and had the old Palace demolished, with the Jedi’s blessing. I think it was something to do with her father’s presence ‘still lingering.’ A lot of what she’s done hasn’t sat well with his old supporters, but considering that she’s managed to unite basically everyone else, they’re not a big problem.”

“I always knew she could do it,” he said quietly, the tension inside of him growing with every step. As they turned a corner, Rex stopped, pulling off his helmet to look Anakin in the eye.

“You’re gonna want to be careful when you go in there. I don’t know how long it’s been since they got put down for their naps, but they can wake up at basically any moment. Especially if it’s someone other than their mother.”

Anakin took a deep breath nodding. He felt their presence. Their soothing, strong presence in the Force. “I’ll be careful. I just want to meet them. I need… I need to… I need to know.”

“I get it, sir. Believe me, I do.” Rex tilted his head. “Three doors down, on your right.”

“Thank you,” Anakin placed a hand on the Captain’s shoulder. “I owe you one, old friend.” The way Rex smiled in reply was slightly pained. As if he had more to say, but he didn’t want to say it out loud. And his mental shields were strong enough that Anakin couldn’t see through them. “We’ll get to talk soon.”

He walked quietly, the stealth of a Jedi working to his advantage, and entered the nursery, closing the door softly behind him. He felt his heart thundering in his chest as he neared the crib that held his children. His mind went back and forward, thinking that he should have returned sooner, and not being ready for it. Because he wasn’t.  _ Now  _ he felt like himself, before Sidious twisted and turned him inside out, but there was a part of him that was forever changed. Before, when he left, he was surrounded by darkness. By pain, regret, and nightmares. He had been falling into the Dark Side and by giving him a chance to leave, Padmé had ultimately saved him.

From the cradle, he felt a wave of pure warmth and love suddenly ripple out, a bond that had been neglected surging to life as his presence in the Force recognized his children. A little squeak came from one of the twins, followed by a coo from the other. As he got closer, a tiny baby hand went up, waving at him, grasping at the air as the squeaks grew more frequent.

“You’re going to get me caught,” he whispered to the babies, a genuine smile appearing in his lips as he felt tears on his cheeks. They were  _ perfect.  _ “Oh, you two are too beautiful,” he added, letting Leia, the one who had been squeaking, grasp his finger.

He didn’t stand a chance. She was looking up at him with the same big brown eyes as her mother, with nothing but love behind them. Next to her, Luke stared up at him with such a serious expression, it seemed like he was contemplating how he would look when he grew up. With his free hand, Anakin brushed a finger across Luke’s chubby cheek and through the curly golden hair on his head. “Hi, you two. I am so sorry. I’m here now. I’m going to be here forever,” he promised. They loved him, he felt that. But more importantly, Anakin knew he would give his life for them. “I’m here,” he repeated. “I’m going to spend the rest of my life making up for these four months.”

Leia let go of her brother’s hand, reaching up to grab the same finger she was already holding and pulling at it.  _ Up _ , she seemed to be saying as she pouted at him. Anakin chuckled as he tickled her tummy. “You want me to hold you?” Her lip began to wobble. “Please don’t cry,” he urged, pursing his lips, looking between Leia’s brown eyes and Luke’s intense blue gaze. He and Padmé had managed to create each other’s miniatures and it was adorable. “I want to hold you both, but how screwed do you think I will be if your mother catches me, for the first time in a year, dropping one of you to the ground?” They blinked at him, clearly not understanding. “Alright, let me see if I can do it,” he carefully bent down to pick Leia up from the crib. 

Her weight in his arms was a blessing and a warm rush of love spread through him as he held her carefully, held her tight against his chest. Anakin brushed his lips in her forehead, closing his eyes at the contact. He loved her. He already was deeply and irrevocably in love with the baby in his arms.  _ I love you. I love you so much.  _ “He didn’t take that away from me,” he whispered more to himself.

Leia snuggled closer to his chest, one hand catching on the edge of his collar as she burbled happily. Still in the cradle, Luke gave some gummy approximation of a smile up at both of them. “How in the Force do I hold the both of you?” He mumbled. Holding Leia tightly in his arm, he leaned down to scoop Luke with his other arm, using the Force to keep them balanced and to help Luke settle in a comfortable position. “There,” he beamed, and kissed Luke’s forehead.  _ I love both of you. I was so afraid I didn’t. But I do. I do. I’ll always love you.  _ And the realization made him cry.

Behind him, the door creaked open, and a woman sighed. “You have no idea how kriffing lucky you are that I’m the one Ahsoka blabbed to.”

Anakin turned, a bit terrified at being caught. For a moment, he honestly thought it was Padmé and he would have no idea,  _ absolutely no idea,  _ of what to tell her. “Sabé?” He was going to strangle Ahsoka for this.

“It’s good to see you, Anakin.” The handmaiden leaned against the doorway, looking a little smug. “And you look very good holding your children.”

He let out a small laugh as he looked down at the twins who were slowly falling asleep. “They’re perfect,” he nodded, sniffing. “And I can barely feel my arms, but I don’t mind. I won’t change this for the world.”

“Here, let me help.” She moved closer, carefully adjusting the twins. “It took Padmé a month to figure out how to balance them.”

“You haven’t told her I am here?” Anakin asked as the positions Sabé adjusted the twins to were much more comfortable.

“Tempting as it is, no. I’d rather not scuttle the chances of the two of you having a proper reunion,” she said

“She must hate me,” he sighed as he sat down on the rocking chair. “I walked out on her. On them.” Anakin looked at their angelic, peaceful faces. They would never know anguish or hatred as he and their mother did. They would never know anything but love and support.

“You both had baggage you needed to work through, it probably would have been a lot messier if you’d stayed,” Sabé said with a shrug. “Although it would have been nice if you’d shown up about two months ago.”

“Lago?” He guessed with a certain coldness.

“Lago,” she confirmed. “He’s about as far from you as anyone can get.”

He raised one curious eyebrow. “Does he make her happy?” The bitterness in his voice was undeniable. He wished he could be actually happy for Padmé and her future consort but… but he had a lot of time to think. To dream. About her. With her. He had a lot of time to evaluate what he felt before, what Sidious used against him, and what was, undeniably, in his heart.

“He’s inoffensive arm candy with just enough of a political background that she can justify it for matters of state, and he’s nice enough that she thinks she can tolerate being around him for the rest of her life. The twins are the only people who really make her happy these days.” Sabé moved to retrieve two bottles from a cabinet. “Do you want to feed them?”

“They’re asleep,” he said, kissing their foreheads again. “I wish I had been here when they were born. That night, I was… I was with Kitster. We were taking some of the slave children I had freed in Tatooine to Bellassa. Amee had found the adoptive homes. I should have been here, but I was so afraid I wasn’t ready.”

“Well, you’re here now, and you have every right to be,” Sabé pointed out with a small smile as she put the bottles back. “She’d never admit it, but she’s missed you. A lot.”

“I’ve missed her too, Sabé, I did. In the end, she was the only reason I still had some of my sanity left. If she hadn’t… been there, after his training, his missions, his punishments… I would have been dead right now. Or worse,” he sighed. “Being away, returning to my roots, I’ve found a new perspective.”

“You love her,” Sabé surmised.

Anakin looked at the handmaiden with a smile. “I’ve loved her for a while,” he paused. “Why do you think he destroyed me?” He asked her quietly.

“She mentioned something to that effect. In the days after she killed him. And again, after you left.”

He looked surprised. “She never told me any of that. What exactly did she know?”

“That you loved her enough for her life to be used as the price for your service,” Sabé answered. “She never told you because she didn’t want to make your decision more difficult.”

“Our relationship wasn’t made to be easy,” he snorted. “Everything from the beginning was against us. Even myself. I hated her.”

“She wasn’t exactly the best version of herself at the time either, Anakin. If it weren’t for you, she still wouldn’t be.”

Anakin pursed his lips and looked down at the two amazing creations in his arms. If they weren’t proof of love, what was? “How definitive do you believe Lago is?”

“They haven’t set a date yet, but she won’t listen to any of us when we tell her that she’s making a mistake.”

“Are they… close as  _ we  _ were?” He knew Sabé would understand his real question.

“They’ve never shared more than a kiss. And chastely at that. I don’t think she’s even told him about  _ that. _ ”

“Good,” he muttered. “Where is she now?”

“In a meeting with the Senate Education Committee. It’ll be at least another hour, at which point, she’ll be here, to check on the twins. And then she has dinner scheduled with her fiancé. And then she’ll disappear for a few hours.”

“Disappear for a few hours?”

“She does that about once a week. Sneaks out of the palace without any kind of guard, and doesn’t come back for hours.”

That was intriguing. “Hmm, I see. You really don’t know where she goes?”

“She’s very tightlipped about it. The few times we’ve tried to follow her, she always gets lost in the crowd.”

“Would you like me to discover?”

Sabé hesitated, considering it. “I suppose you would have an easier time of it than we would. What with the Force sensitivity and everything. And it would be nice to know what she’s up to. We’re all worried about her.”

“Leave it to me,” he nodded and nuzzled Luke’s curls. “I love them so much, I never thought this would be possible. It’s so pure, Sabé, it’s so… enlightening. Everything makes sense now. Everything. It’s like I stopped having doubts.”

“I just hope you can show her that too, Anakin. She needs you just as much as they do.”

“Don’t worry, Sabé. What I have to do has never been clearer. Can I stay with them until she leaves the Committee? I just… well, I kind of need help because I can’t feel my arms. But I would like to stay and just see them sleep.”

She laughed a little and took Leia from him first, easily transitioning the baby girl back to the crib. “Occupational hazard. Just make sure Padmé doesn’t see you when she comes by. I’ll see you get something to eat while she’s with Lord Dullness.”

“Thank you, Sabé,” he beamed.

“Welcome back, Anakin. We’ve missed you.”

He grinned slowly, looking down at Luke and kissing his little nose. “It’s good to be home.”

* * *

Padmé sighed, pulling the pins out of her hair as she headed down to the nursery. The Education Committee had been more draining than she’d expected, but it was finally over. “Did you miss me?” she asked as she stepped into her children’s room. “Because I missed you.”

Leia was fast asleep, but Luke was wide awake, wiggling back and forth and waving his hands as he squealed. “Oh my goodness, what makes you so active?” Padmé laughed, picking him up and holding him close. He hiccuped and sighed, cuddling close. “Oh, I see, you just wanted this, didn’t you?” As he settled in her arms, Padmé let herself get lost in the little details of his face. “You're going to be so beautiful when you grow up,” she sighed, “just like your daddy. I called him Angel, you know. Like the beings that live on the moons of Iego and are supposedly the most beautiful in the universe. And he was more than beautiful, he was kind and brave and loyal... he was far too good for Mamma."

Luke gazed at her with a serious look before he smiled at her, hand coming up to play with the japor snippet. His blue eyes were so innocent, full of life and love. Love for her. “You and your sister are too good for me too,” she sighed. “But I love you so much. And I promise I’ll never let my love hurt you the way it hurt your daddy.” He hiccuped, cooing afterward, snuggling his head closer to her chest.

Padmé leaned down and pressed a kiss to his curls, then paused, frowning. She could have sworn she heard something move. Inside the fresher of the twins’ nursery, Anakin winced and hoped she wouldn’t enter. Her speech had made him want to come out and do a whole reveal but he immediately realized it wouldn’t be the right time. No, it couldn’t be like this. Stepping backward, he hoped she didn’t enter because he wanted to tell her he was back in a different, more proper way. He did miss her. He missed her and he wanted to hug her and he wanted to come clean, to finally tell her  _ everything. _

“Well, if you’re not hungry, and your sister’s asleep, I better go. Ian’s waiting for me, and then I have my appointment, but Sabé and the others will look after you until I get back. Mamma loves you so much.” She placed him back in the cradle next to Leia and kissed each of them on the forehead one more time before turning to leave. At the door, she stopped and glanced back over her shoulder, just to make sure she hadn’t imagined anything.

Once she left, Anakin stepped out with a thoughtful face.  _ Appointment? What appointment? _


	11. Reignited and Consumed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content warning for some non-consensual sexual interaction by way of mistaken identity during the second section (look for the line break). Nothing super violent, but it's still not informed consent, so we felt the need to warn you. We weren't sure where to tell you to stop reading because it's kind of the whole premise of the section, so... proceed with caution? If you want to skip it entirely, just text search for "Vos Gesal Hotel."

Padmé’s feeling from the nursery had returned shortly after she’d left the palace. The feeling that someone was watching her, more so than usual. She  _ knew _ her handmaidens had tried to follow her before, but she’d thought they would have given up by this point. Even so, she pulled the hood of her dress closer to her face. It wasn’t much further of a walk to the Empire’s Secret Gardens, and she’d navigated the streets of the Uscru Entertainment District enough times now that she was confident in her abilities not to be accosted on her way to the club, but tonight felt different, and she couldn’t figure out why.

She made it the last few blocks, and knocked on the door, watching as the gatekeeper droid extended. “Identity,” it requested.

“Veré Starkiller,” she said, “customer code one-six-zero-five-two-zero-zero-two.”

“Confirmed, access granted.” The droid retracted back into the wall and the door opened, allowing her inside. The club was as it always was, dim lighting against red walls, and the sounds of sexual pleasure mixed with screams of pain from the rooms upstairs, as well as the exhibitionists on the main floor.

“Lady Starkiller,” the host moved to greet her. “A pleasure as always, but you’re a little earlier than usual. Your room isn’t ready. Unless you’d like a different suite?”

“I can wait a little while,” she assured him. “I’d prefer my usual.”

“We’ll have the girls prepare you, then.” The host snapped his fingers and two giggling women dressed in the kind of outfits normally reserved for the girls in Hutt harems materialized at Padmé’s side. She nodded, letting them lead her into the changing room as her adrenaline began to mount.

Release was coming. Penance was coming. That was all that mattered.

* * *

Following her had been tricky, she was evasive. Thankfully, the Force presence always put him in the right path, until she reached a door and he stood a few feet back, hidden underneath his cloak and in the shadows.  _ “Veré Starkiller.”  _ It was original. But why did she need an alias? What was she doing, exactly?

Padmé entered and a few seconds later, he knocked on the door.

“Identity.”

Anakin thought for a moment. “Set,” he knew where she took the name Veré from, it was only fair he took her partner’s name. “I’m new. I would like an appointment.”

“Wait to be greeted.” The droid disappeared and the door opened to let him.

It took seconds for Anakin to realize where he was. What it was. It was a fetish club. He tilted his head as it began to make sense, given Padmé’s predilection for playing the dominant role, what he didn’t understand was why she didn’t use her fiancé for her kinks.

“Welcome, sir,” a green-skinned Twi’lek woman wearing strategically placed black netting and nothing else sauntered towards him with an overly charming smile. “Welcome to the Empire’s Secret Garden. What delights can we provide for you?”

“I’m looking for someone specific. A client of yours. Veré Starkiller. I would like to be assigned to her.”  _ Well, there goes the ‘proper’ meeting _ . There would be nothing proper about this particular meeting.

The woman frowned. “Lady Starkiller is one of our best patrons, sir. She has established her preferences for her time here, and it would be against policy to deviate from them. And we are not hiring new dominants at this point. Even if we were, your behavior is highly inappropriate for an establishment of our caliber. If you wish to hire one of the submissives in our employ for the evening, you’re welcome to do so, but if not, I am going to have to ask you to leave.”

“Me? Dominant?”  _ What?  _ “Are you telling me Veré is a submissive at your establishment?”  _ Interesting…  _ “I don’t think I’m going to leave,” he said slowly. “Actually,” staring intensely into the Twi’lek’s eyes, and moving a hand before her eyes, he spoke, “you will be taking me to Veré Starkiller. I will be who she has tonight. Her dominant. We are not to be bothered and her regular dominant will entertain you.”

The woman blinked in surprise, but she nodded as the mind trick settled in. “This way, sir, she’s being prepared now.” She gestured for him to follow her down the hall and up an ornately carved silver staircase. “Lady Starkiller’s preferred safeword is ‘love,’ and the only requirements are that her blindfold remains on until you end the scene and begin aftercare and you do not kiss her on the mouth.”

“I see,” he nodded in understanding, his mind reeling with the endless possibilities of what he could do. He would need to use the Force to dull her senses. If he were to speak, she would know it was him, and he would prefer if she didn’t until the end of the scene.

“She’s very insistent that you not hold back either. She asks that of her usual dominants.”

“I understand what she needs. Don’t worry, she’ll be satisfied with the service.”

“Good, here we are.” She stopped at a black door with the number 3 embossed on the side. “You can prepare in the ante-chamber, she’ll be waiting in the mainspace. The toys are already set up.”

“Thank you,” he waited for her to leave before entering and taking a deep breath in the ante-chamber. He was never the dominant. Padmé was. She knew what to do and how to do it. He much preferred the submissive role, he didn’t have to worry as much. He stripped his cloak and his robes, followed by his boots, standing only in his pants. He looked around the toys and frowned. Padmé always knew what to use, but Anakin was at a loss. He calculated that cuffs were inside the bedroom, but… there was something he remembered well. Picking up the riding crop from the wall, he took a breath. He was ready.

As he stepped into the room, he saw Padmé standing with her back to him, arms and legs spread by the chains holding them against the posts at the foot of the bed. What little coverage was afforded to her by her brassiere, underwear, and stockings was made of sheer black lace that left nothing to the imagination. Contrasting that delicate eroticism were the black leather cuffs around her wrists, ankles, throat, waist, and head.

Anakin was immediately reminded of that animalistic attraction he felt for his wife when she introduced him to the beauty of sex. She was still as beautiful as the day she first took his virginity and pregnancy had probably made her body sexier, with more curves. He bit his lower lip to keep himself from groaning. Walking behind her, and making sure the Force was influencing her hearing, he caressed her backside with one hand. “Good evening, Lady Starkiller.” He squeezed her cheek, fingers brushing her center.

“My lord,” she exhaled.

That sent tingles all over his body at her voice and he kept kneading the flesh of her ass. “Ready to be a good girl?”

“I’m never good, my lord,” she answered, a hint of puzzlement in her voice. “That’s why you have to punish me.”

_ Kriff. I suck at this.  _ “Like this, you mean?” Distracting her was a good plan and he used the riding crop to hit her left cheek. She gasped at the impact and nodded. “Or more like this?” He hit the right cheek a bit harder.

“As hard as you can,” she whispered. “You know I deserve it.”

He liked the sounds that came from her lips. He was motivated by them. He used the riding crop to leave her ass pink, the only sounds heard in the room were the sound of leather hitting the skin, and her gasps and moans. “Nice and tender,” he whispered before using his hand to slap her, fingers brushing her entrance as he did so.

Padmé’s breath hitched, and she twisted her hips away from him. “No, don’t, I’m not worthy.”

He hummed and moved away, choosing to remove her brassiere. One hand came around her body and grasped her breast as he gently bit down on her shoulder. Force, he wanted to take her, but he had to enjoy this moment, even if he could be a little clueless. His ex-wife whimpered, tensing under his touch. Trying to resist the pleasure it brought on, even as it washed over her. His free down trailed down her body, ghost fingers over her stomach, as he slipped his hand under her underwear and began to tease her clit.

“My lord, please,” she gasped. “I don’t… I don’t understand.”

“You don’t have to. It’s an order,” he whispered in her ear as he inserted one finger inside of her warmth. 

“An order?”

Anakin hesitated. “Yes..?”  _ Kriff, what now? _

“Tell me what you want, my lord, I’m yours.”

“I want you to let go. Come for me.” He said with more dominance, pressing his erection against her backside and moving his fingers inside of her. She let out a choked gasp as she released, slumping against him.

_ Is he new _ ? He heard the thought in her head.  _ Didn’t they brief him?  _ He could feel the confusion swirling off her, along with memories of the other times she’d been here. Men who had made her bleed and scream and weep, used every cavity she had to offer, then held her and stroked her hair and forgave her when the blindfold came off. Men with blond hair and blue eyes who all looked at least a little like him. A few times, he even caught the sound of her saying his name in the memories.

“ _ Anakin, I’m sorry.” _

“ _ Anakin, I never deserved you.” _

“ _ Hurt me, Anakin. Make me pay for my sins.” _

Anakin sighed, the knowledge she had been with other men not pleasant, but not unexpected. He would get over it. Probably. Well, one day. What he couldn’t get over was why she was doing it. They weren’t perfect, they never were, but he didn’t want her punishing herself like that.

Using the Force, he made the cuffs that held her in place open, supporting her weight with his body, holding her firmly. He turned her face to his with a finger and pressed his lips against hers in a soft, careful kiss. 

For a brief moment, she leaned into it on pure instinct. The dormant connection between the two of them, the one born from their shared destruction at the hands of her father, forged in the moments they’d stolen during their marriage, sprang back to life, and she moaned with the desire it triggered in her. Then she pulled back, shaking her head.

“Love?” The safeword came out shaky and uncertain, more like she was asking a question than declaring her limits.

“I’m not very good at this role,” he said softly as he undid the blindfold, Force tricks forgotten. “I prefer leaving it to you.”

“A-Anakin?” she stammered as her eyes opened, staring at him in disbelief. “I… is that…”

“Hi,” he gave her a timid smile.

“I’m dreaming,” she said. “I have to be.”

“No, it’s really me,” he whispered, caressing her cheek. “I couldn’t stay away any longer.” She backed up onto the mattress, covering her body with the bedding self-consciously, and he raised one eyebrow. “There’s nothing underneath that sheet I haven’t seen, Padmé.”

“Well, yes, but you were on Tatooine!” she protested, her entire face blushing scarlet. “I thought you were staying there forever. I didn’t expect to ever see you again, especially not like this!”

“I…” He hesitated. “I came back. My mission on Tatooine is complete. I’m… complete. Well, not really, I don’t feel  _ complete  _ but that’s not really something I want to discuss  _ here _ , but I am… me, again. If that makes sense. So… I came back.”

“You might have called ahead,” she said testily. He frowned at her resistance. “Rather than letting us come to this point. But I agree that we shouldn’t do this here. There’s no shortage of establishments in the area that are equally discreet and much less,” she paused, “activity-based.”

“Alright,” he said slowly. “Maybe we should leave then.”

“Fine.”

Anakin looked confused, and maybe a little hurt, at the cold shower. This was not the reception he was hoping for. “I’ll dress in the ante-chamber,” he mumbled.

“I’ll meet you outside the club,” she said, her voice a little softer and kinder.

“Deal,” he agreed, entering the ante-chamber. Well, that had gone awkwardly wrong. 

* * *

They ended up taking a room at the Vos Gesal Hotel, but Padmé blatantly stayed away from the bed. There were too many emotions at war within her right now, not the least of which was the arousal resulting from the fact that she’d just been fingerfucked and kissed by her ex-husband while blindfolded and chained to a bed in a fetish club.

“So,” Anakin started, trailing off, awkwardly shifting in his seat opposite of her.

“Anakin, you should have  _ told  _ me you were coming back.”

“I was managing expectations. I had doubts all the way here, it wasn’t until I…” he started arguing before trailing off.  _ She’s going to kill me. _

“Until what?” She folded her arms, narrowing her eyes.

“Until I snuck into the Palace and saw the twins. Held them. Realized my fears were unfounded all this time and Sidious hadn’t completely destroyed my ability to love. That I do love them. I would die for them and I don’t want to miss another day from now until forever. So yeah, until that happened, I had doubts.” He blurted out.

“Let me see if I’m understanding this,” she said slowly. “You snuck into the palace, into the nursery, you saw the children, and then you decided that the best thing to do was to follow me to a club and act as my dominant while I couldn’t tell who you were?”

“When you say it like that, it sounds wrong. It’s more than that. I heard you speaking to Luke, about me.” Her cheeks burned bright red at the realization. “That's why I didn’t hesitate tonight. I was curious about your mysterious weekly nights and followed you. When I realized what it was, I could have turned away, but I didn’t because… well, apparently I’m stupid. I’m sorry, were you expecting your fiancé?” He snapped.

“Ian is  _ never _ going to know about this side of me, he doesn’t need to,” she retorted coldly. “None of this is about him.”

“What a great marriage you two will have,” he said dryly. “Why even pick him, then?”

“I don’t need to explain my relationship to you.”

“He’s going to be my children’s step-father, I have a right to know.”

“Fine. I knew him when I was attending school as a child, we were fond of each other until Father became Emperor and I had to leave. He came to Coruscant two months ago, and we started seeing each other. He proposed to me two weeks ago, and I said yes because it is exhausting to try and rule this Empire and be a parent on my own, and he was willing to help me. What else do you need to know?”

Anakin leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees and face supported by his hands. He looked at her with clear, blue eyes. The same as their son’s eyes. “What if I asked you not to marry him? What would you do?” He asked calmly.

“Not marry him and do what?” she replied, her voice brittle.

“What do you want to do?”

“Anakin, I want what’s best for the children, and if you’d just come to me directly, maybe we could have talked out a visitation schedule, but now you’ve brought  _ us _ into it—”

“Padmé, Padmé,” he interrupted. “It’s a simple question. What. Do. You. Want?” He challenged. “Tell me. What do you want? Do you want to marry Ian? Be Mrs. Lago, a dutiful and loving housewife, who happens to rule an Empire, is that what you want?”

“I’ve stopped thinking about what I want,” she retorted.

“Fantastic. My question remains the same.” He insisted.

“What I wanted was you!” Padmé shouted finally, tears flowing down her face. “I wanted you, and I let you leave me because I was trying to do the right thing, and it has taken me so long to make myself heal after you left, and now you’ve come back and ruined that!”

“I’m here,” he said slowly, sitting on the edge of his seat. “I’m here. I’m late, I know, but still… I’m here and I’m not going anywhere. I’m the person you met initially. The one who argued over every little thing and behaved childishly. The one who grew to care for you. More than that, actually. I left, Padmé, because I would have hurt you and the twins. I had nightmares every night. He whispered in my head, even from the grave. I would have killed you if I had stayed. I wasn’t myself. I was Vader, I was getting deeper and deeper into him and that’s not the husband you want, the  _ father  _ they deserve.” He took a deep breath. “I would not be to them what Sidious was to you. So I left.”

“And I’m proud of you for that, Anakin, really, I am.”

“But?” He gritted his teeth, annoyed.

“But  _ I’ve _ changed. I had to. I understand that your leaving was the right thing to do for both of us, but it still broke my heart. I had to pick up the pieces and be an Empress and a mother, and I had to do it without you. I had to get to a point where I no longer needed you like I believed you no longer needed me. And the longer it went on, the more I convinced myself you weren’t coming back and that I should try to move on with my life the same way you had. I had to protect my heart for the sake of my—  _ our  _ children. That’s the real reason I’m marrying Ian. I know I’ll never be in any danger of falling in love with him, so there’s no chance he can hurt me.” She rose from her seat and moved to the window, staring out at the luminescent skyline as she whispered her next confession. “I left domination behind after you left because it reminded me too much of what I’d done to you. What happened tonight, what  _ would  _ have happened if you hadn’t intervened, wasn’t about pleasure, it was about penance.”

Anakin bit his tongue. He had been running on his emotions the entire day. Seeing the twins had awoken something in him that he had left dormant for a long time in order to heal himself. It was probably stupid of him to follow her. Well, following her wasn’t the actual issue, but he acted on impulse when he entered. He couldn’t argue with her reasoning, they both had to heal from their scars and do what was right for them, for their children. Anakin could already imagine his life… he would stay in Coruscant, for the twins, of course, and would take the role of Master more seriously in the New Order. He could teach the younglings. Help Obi-Wan with assignments. Someday later, he would teach his own children and watch as Obi-Wan took Luke, it was definitely Luke, to be his Padawan and Ahsoka claimed Leia, as terrifying as that duo sounded. Leia did have a temper on her, his temper, and Ahsoka would be prone to indulge her later in life.

No matter how much the idea of visiting the twins and seeing Ian Lago and Padmé together was sickening, he had to push it down. He was sure something could be arranged so they didn’t have to see each other unless it was mandatory, like birthdays or relevant special occasions. 

“I’m sorry for tonight, I shouldn’t have done it,” he said quietly, standing up and adjusting his robes. “I understand what you’re saying and I apologize for pushing you. If marrying Ian is what you want, what you need, I won’t stand in your way. I just hope he can be what you need. But if you believe he is, I believe it too. We’ll find a way to arrange a visitation schedule with the twins. With your work, it’s possible we don’t have to see a lot of each other.”

“I’m glad you’ll be in their lives,” she admitted softly. “I think they always knew you were out there. And that they needed you.” Her voice skipped a little on the word ‘they,’ as if she’d almost said something else.

Anakin gave her a long look before scowling. “I’ll leave, then. I’ll stop by tomorrow as if this day hasn’t happened,” he muttered, annoyed. She winced involuntarily.

“That won’t be necessary, I’m going to be bringing the twins to the Temple for a checkup tomorrow, you can see them then. I’m sure Sabé can give you the details.”

“Yeah, I’m done listening to Sabé. Or Ahsoka. Or Obi-Wan. They are apparently deluded,” he scoffed, walking towards the door.

“What are you talking about?”

“The twins aren’t the only reason I came back,” he turned to her, blue eyes flashing. “They’re the reason I’ll stay but I thought… they told me… I believed… it doesn’t matter, you made yourself very clear.”

“Say it.” Her voice took on the commanding tone she’d used so many times during their marriage, that deeper, more regal cadence that could drive him over the edge.

“That you wanted me back.” He obeyed.

“Why would it matter if I wanted you back?” she retorted, closing the distance between them. “My wanting you had nothing to do with why you left. Tell me the truth.”

“No,” he muttered petulantly. “I already asked you and you chose Lago.”

“You asked an open-ended question about what I wanted, that’s not the same thing as a choice.” She gripped the edge of his tunic. “What do  _ you _ want, Anakin? What would you have me choose? What do  _ you _ dream about?”

“You.”

The single syllable, something she’d craved in the deepest parts of her soul, erased every other thought from her mind. With one hand, she pulled him closer, bringing their mouths together in a fiery kiss as the other hand worked at the layers of his robes. Some rational part of her mind knew that this would spell disaster for them in the aftermath, but she didn’t  _ care _ , she wanted this, she wanted what they’d given up for thirteen months, she wanted him back.

Anakin moaned into her mouth, kissing her back with the same passion. He pushed her dress off of her shoulders, trying to get all the obstacles that were between them off so it could be skin on skin, a contact he craved more than he admitted. “Bed,” she groaned against his lips, “now.”

With his hands underneath the curve of her ass, he picked her up, her legs coming around his waist as he walked towards the bed without breaking their frantic kiss. As he reached the bottom, he threw her on top of the mattress, climbing over her immediately after. She latched her legs around his waist and swung her body with its full weight, rolling so that he was the one on his back. 

“You have to earn being on top, Angel,” she whispered, her eyes almost black with desire as she traced his cheek with her fingers. “And tonight, you were very, very bad.”

“What are you going to do about it, my lady?” He smirked up at her, and she leaned down, sinking her teeth into the same spot where he’d bitten her not an hour before.

“Hands up,” she whispered, licking and nipping the shell of his ear. “On the headboard. And you don’t move them again until I say.” He did as he was told, moaning at her actions. This was natural. This was what he knew, what he had learned to love with her. She moved down his neck and chest, leaving the marks of her kisses and bites on his skin until she reached his pants, pulling them down to expose his cock. “There you are,” she hummed, kissing the tip and sucking the first beads of pre-cum from it. Then her lips parted, her tongue swirled across his shaft, and she practically inhaled his length, letting it hit the back of her throat.  _ Anakin, _ she thought his name with all the love and desire she’d been repressing for over a year.  _ My Anakin.  _

Anakin moaned as his hips thrust into her mouth, pleasure rushing through every inch of his body as he got lost in it. “Yes,  _ yes, _ yours,  _ kriff,  _ that feels so good.”

_ Spill for me, _ she ordered him mentally as her hands reached around to squeeze his buttocks _.  _ He came with a loud cry, spilling himself into her mouth. She held him tight, not letting a single drop of his spend go to waste, only pulling back when he’d finished entirely. “Your turn,” she whispered, brushing her fingers over her lips to collect a few drops of the seed and holding them over his mouth. “Taste yourself before you taste me, Angel.” He opened his mouth and took her fingers into it, sucking and licking and moaning at the same time. She smiled at him and placed her hands over his on the headboard, using the support to pull herself onto her knees. “Do you want me to sit on your face?”

“Yes,” he whispered, biting his lip. “Please, my lady.”

“Eat up, then.” She lowered herself down until the folds of her womanhood rested on his mouth.

Anakin was like a hungry animal as he raised his face and latched on to her sex. He licked and sucked, moaning at her intoxicating taste. He moved his mouth, using his tongue to create pressure on her clit and on her entrance, and she rocked her hips back and forth in response, hissing as her climax drew nearer. With a cry, she released, the sweet creamy elixir of her arousal flooding his mouth as he greedily drank it, sighing in content.

Padmé moved off him, settling by his side and pressing her head against his chest, leaving a kiss at the hollow of his throat. “Did you want more?”

“I want to be inside of you,” he whispered. “You don’t know how I missed you.”

“Say please, Angel.”

“Please.”

“Please what?” she asked with a smirk as she sat up and ran her hand over his cock, stroking it back to a semi-erect state.

“Please, my lady,” he moaned, bucking his hips to try and meet her. “Please, please, please.”

“You want me to fuck you?” she cooed sweetly.

“Hard, my lady.”

“That’s my sweet Angel.” She complied, climbing on top of him and enveloping him in her folds with a single fluid motion, made easier by the fact that they were both still slick from their previous orgasms. “Oh, yes, there it is,” she groaned at the pleasure of being filled by him.

“Fuck, yes,” he gasped as he bucked his hips upwards. “Force,” he whispered. Her entire upper body undulated as she rode him closer and closer to his breaking point, then she stilled, looking down into his eyes with an unexpected amount of vulnerability.

“Do you love me?” she whispered.

Anakin stilled as well, his body tensing because he was so near to his release. He had to think for a few seconds on her unexpected question. “Of course I do,” he whispered, equally vulnerable. “I’ve loved you for a long time now.” Still keeping him sheathed inside her, she fell on top of him, kissing him with unexpected desperation.

“I love you too,” she exhaled through tears.

Forgetting her initial command, his hands came around her body, hugging her to him as he kissed her tears away. “It’s alright. We got here. I love you.” Her release came not with a cry of pleasure, but a shudder of relief as she slumped against him and cuddled close. Anakin came after her, moaning into her hair, stilling inside of her. She clung to him like they were adrift in the sea, and he was her only lifeline, weeping softly.

“My Anakin. My Angel.”

“My Queen,” he whispered back in reverence. 

“No, say my name,” she requested. “Please.”

“My Padmé. My Queen, always,” he kissed her temple softly.

“I love it when you say my name,” she sighed, then stiffened in his arms, moving a hand to rub at her breasts as they ached, and she felt a few drops of milk leaking out. “Kriff. I need to get back to the palace, the twins are probably going to wake at any moment.”

“Can I go with you?” He asked. She hesitated for a moment, then nodded.

“But you’ll have to leave before morning. I,” she wet her lips and swallowed, “I need time to figure out how I can end things with Ian. Without hurting him more than necessary.” Because she  _ would _ end it, he was right. She couldn’t live a lie with someone she didn’t love.

“Deal. I have to go and meet Obi-Wan in the morning as well.”

“Then we should probably get out of bed now.”

He kissed her forehead and rolled to the side with her, moaning as he left her. “Let’s get to our children.” It sounded so  _ right _ when he said it that she smiled brightly enough to outshine the entire planet.


	12. The Prices We Pay

This was a bad idea. This was a very, very bad idea, but it was happening, and Padmé hated herself for that as she shifted Luke in her arms.

“You liked me just fine yesterday, I have no idea what’s gotten into you,” Ian said from behind her, and she nearly dropped her son before she realized he was speaking to Leia, who was wriggling and whimpering in Ian’s grip as they ascended the steps of the New Order’s Temple.

“We could have taken the carrier, saved you the trouble,” she said apologetically.

“Nonsense, I’m going to be their stepfather, I don’t mind holding them,” Ian said amiably. Padmé hid a grimace. As soon as Anakin had come back into her life, it had become impossible to ignore what her handmaidens had pointed out countless times. Ian was pleasant enough, but he was  _ boring _ too. He had to be the only person in the galaxy who had entered politics and lost all passion.

“Ian, I’d rather not take the risk, if you think you might drop her, then please give her to Sabé.”

“Your majesty, good to see you,” said a chirpy voice as they neared the entrance. Ahsoka beamed at them. “There are my favorite Skybabies,” she extended her arms for Leia. “Come here, future Padawan.”

“Hello, Master Tano,” Padmé smiled warmly as Ahsoka lifted Leia up and covered her tummy in kisses. The little princess kicked and giggled happily in the Togruta’s arms. “But I believe we’ve been over this, I want the twins to decide their futures for themselves.”

“I respect that,” she cuddled Leia to her. “But they will still need to sharpen their skills in the Force. They were born with a gift. A  _ big  _ one. They will need to learn how to use it and I’ll make sure Leia is prepared,” she gave a kiss on the baby’s cheek. “Come. Vokara is waiting for us.”

“Wonderful,” Padmé nodded, following her to the Healing Center. In her arms, Luke’s eyes widened and he tried to wave at the Jedi and Padawans who passed them. Leia was more focused on trying to grab Ahsoka’s montrals and stick one in her mouth. “Sweetie, no, don’t do that to your Auntie Soka.”

“Lord Lago, you don’t need to be in the appointment,” Ahsoka said politely. “I’m sure it will be dull for you, you can take a tour of the grounds if you want to.”

Padmé swallowed nervously. She had no idea where on the grounds Anakin might be, but before she could say something, Ian nodded. “Sounds fascinating. I’ll meet you back here when I’m done, sweetheart.” He leaned over to peck Padmé’s lips, and she let him do it without much protest.

As Ahsoka watched him leave and out of earshot, she snorted. “You know, he’s sort of lucky Anakin is patiently waiting with Vokara,” she smirked. Padmé groaned. She should have expected that.

“I’d appreciate you not being so smug about that,” she said as they headed toward the examination rooms.

“Skyguy said the same thing,” she chuckled. “Let’s go and see Daddy, Leia.” She bounced the baby with a wide smile.

“Are those my favorite little ones?” Vokara opened the door of her office with a smile. “It’s good to see you, Empress.”

“Good morning, Vokara,” Padmé smiled warmly at the Twi’lek woman. “And yes, they’re here, all ready for their checkup.”

“I want to hold them first,” Anakin quipped from the inside as Leia began squeaking in Ahsoka’s arms. “I know who has been anxious to,” he cooed as he came to meet Ahsoka, who rolled her eyes, kissed Leia’s brown curls, and handed her to Anakin, who cradled her to his chest. “Hi, Princess,” he whispered.

“Hello, Anakin.” Padmé blushed slightly at him as she set Luke on the exam table. Sabé took a seat, watching them with a knowing smile. “Not a word out of you,” the Empress said with a huff.

“Hi, your majesty,” he beamed at her with a wide smile as Leia laid her head on his chest and fisted the lapels of his robes.

“You know it’s interesting,” Ahsoka drawled. “When Padmé and the Archduke of Dullness got here, she was kicking and squirming like there was no tomorrow, but with you, she’s snug as can be.”

“Ahsoka,  _ please _ ,” Padmé sighed.

“She knows who her daddy is,” he mumbled, kissing her cheek and Leia almost looked smug as she cooed. “Besides, they can feel my presence. They know when I’m near.”

“Are they still on a fairly regular schedule, your majesty?” Vokara asked diplomatically.

“Almost to the minute,” Padmé confirmed. “I could practically set my chrono to them.”

“Any use of Force?” Vokara asked.

“How’s their count?” Anakin interrupted before Padmé could answer.

“High,” Vokara replied.

“How high?” Anakin tilted his head.

“About twenty-two thousand each,” Vokara answered. “Your majesty, are they using the Force?”

“Mostly to move their stuffed toys towards them,” Padmé answered. “I assumed that was normal for children of their age and abilities. And sometimes I feel like they’re trying to speak to me through the Force, but I’m not strong enough to be sure.” She looked over at Anakin. “This might be your area of expertise. I know you’ve only been with them a few times, but do they ever try something like that with you?”

“They do, they are very demanding through the Force. They call. It’s inexperienced. They have these whims and made them known through the Force.”

“They’re definitely too young for formal training, but I would recommend that a member of the Order be positioned in your household, your majesty,” Vokara said as she began to unbutton Luke’s onesie. “Just to make sure their needs in the Force are being addressed as well as their physical needs.”

“I’ll volunteer if no one else wants the job,” Ahsoka teased.

“Easy, Snips,” Anakin rolled his eyes. 

“I could be placed there temporarily,” she pointed out. “Until  _ someone  _ takes the job.”

“Whatever is going on in your personal life, please don’t involve me in it,” requested Vokara, placing a hand on Luke’s chest as she tested his heartbeat and lungs. Anakin chuckled as he saw his son let Vokara inspect him while being very focused on her features. “I can feel your stare, Skywalker. Luke is always the good one. Leia gives me more trouble.” He snorted, not at all surprised. 

“Which is why I don’t think she’s going to be a very good Jedi  _ or _ Empress,” Padmé added with a chuckle. “Too much of her daddy’s temper.”

“Don’t listen, you’ll be perfect,” he whispered in the baby’s ear and Leia sneezed. “Yes, you’re going to drive Ahsoka as crazy as I drove Obi-Wan. Yes, you are.”

“I can hear you, Skyguy,” Ahsoka reminded him with a huff. “And I resent that. I know how to handle Skywalkers, thank you very much.”

“Luke is looking very good, your Majesty, his lungs are clear, his heart is strong, and he’s very well behaved,” Vokara pronounced as she passed the boy back into his mother’s arms. “Anakin, I will need your daughter next.”

“If you have to,” he sighed as he passed Leia over to Vokara’s arms, Leia immediately started whimpering, eyes filling with big, fake tears as she kicked her legs in protest.

“Do not give me that attitude, little princess, we do this every time you are here,” Vokara scolded as she placed Leia on the examination table. Leia whimpered, fisting her little hands near her face and letting out a mewl of protest. Padmé, who had finished dressing Luke, moved over and extended a finger for Leia to grab.

“Anakin, help me, would you?” she asked.

“She’s just anxious,” he whispered as he leaned on the table. “Aren’t you, Princess?” He asked as Leia stared at him intently. “It’s okay,” he smiled widely and Leia puckered her lips. “We’re here and you’re a very good girl,” he caressed her soft, thin curls. Vokara repeated the same procedure she’d done on Luke and pursed her lips slightly.

“Is she still fussing?” she asked Padmé.

“Yes, she is, but I always manage to get her to cooperate eventually.”

“I think you have a new weapon to settle her down,” Ahsoka said amusedly as she saw how focused Leia had become on Anakin that she let Vokara do whatever she wanted without fussing too much.

“So it would seem,” Padmé agreed with a huff. “But she is alright?”

“She’s as healthy as her brother, you have nothing to worry about physically. And you’ve done very well for a non-Force-sensitive parent.”

“Not  _ entirely _ non-Force-sensitive,” Padmé mumbled under her breath as she glanced at Anakin knowingly.

He winked at her before picking Leia back up and kissing her cheek, hugging her to his chest. “I’m addicted to them,” he confessed, sighing in content as Leia rested her head on his shoulder.

“It’s not addiction, Anakin, it’s parenthood,” Padmé laughed.

“Still,” he rolled his eyes. “When are you kicking the other thing to the curb so I can be with them day and night?” He raised his eyebrows.

Vokara coughed and gave them each a bow before leaving the room, and Padmé sighed, grateful for the modicum of privacy. “I’m working on it, Anakin. But Ian is not a  _ thing _ , he’s a person with feelings. And I would like to hurt those feelings as little as possible.”

“But you  _ are _ breaking up with him?” Ahsoka pressed. “Right?” 

Anakin looked up at Padmé expectantly and even the twins seemed to be staring at their mother, waiting for her answer.

“As soon as I can figure out a way to do it properly, yes, I will be ending our engagement,” Padmé sighed. “Are you both satisfied now?”

“Immensely.” Anakin chuckled.

“Please don’t do that, it makes me feel like I’m a bad person.”

“You’re not. If you were a bad person, you would be letting me do it.”

“Then you have to give me time.” She leaned in to kiss him on the cheek. “Can you do that for me? Please?

“Will you leave the twins with me in the Temple?” He questioned.

“We might have to negotiate, I’m their main source of food,” Padmé teased. 

“All the more reason for you to hurry, they hate bottles,” he snickered. “Leave them with me,” he said more seriously. “I’ll have backup. Ahsoka, Vokara, and Obi-Wan. Sabé can stay too if it makes you feel better and we can always try to cheat with the bottles, see if it sticks,” he kissed Leia’s head. “Please? We need to bond.”

“You will have time to break up with Ian,” Sabé said, and Padmé nearly jumped. Her decoy could blend into the background very well when it suited her. “No distractions.”

“Oh, all right,” she groaned in defeat. “I’ll leave them with you for the night to end things with Ian. Happy?”

“I will be when we’re a family again,” Anakin said. Padmé started to lean towards him for a kiss, only to be stopped by a knocking.

“Padmé,” Ian’s voice came from the other side of the door. “Are you all done? I was thinking we could all go to lunch if everything was done.” The empress winced. 

“You could introduce us,” Anakin shrugged. “Maybe he’ll get a hint.”

“Come in, Ian,” Sabé trilled in an eerily accurate impression of Padmé’s voice. Her mistress huffed as the red-headed fiancé they’d just been discussing entered the room. 

“Hello, darling.” He moved to kiss Padmé on the lips and she turned her head so that he would only graze her cheek instead and she could swear Anakin’s eyes flashed gold for a second. By this point, Ian had noticed the other man in the room and smiled cluelessly. “Hello, Master Jedi, I don’t think we’ve met before.” He extended a hand to shake.

“You will forgive me if I don’t shake your hand, Lord Lago, I do not wish to drop my daughter and she’s almost asleep,” Anakin said with a very calm voice. Ian seemed to stop and restart, like Threepio processing information.

“You’re Anakin Skywalker.”

_ Brain works,  _ Ahsoka thought mockingly. 

_ “Indeed.” _

“Anakin just came back from a mission to Tatooine,” Padmé managed to say, passing Luke to Sabé. “And he wanted to meet the twins.”

“After four months?” Ian drawled, his tone uncharacteristically condescending.

“Some of us don’t have the luxury of not getting our hands dirty,” Anakin replied as he caressed Luke’s cheek with a smile. “Tatooine had slave children who needed help. I’ve apologized to the twins, and to Padmé.”

“How noble of you.” 

“I try,” Anakin replied easily.

“Vokara said she wants to keep the twins here tonight for in-depth observation,” Padmé interjected, moving between the two men. “And Anakin wanted to spend some more meaningful time with them.”

“Which means you two lovebirds have some alone time,” Anakin replied with a cold smile. “It’s a win for us all, don’t you agree, Lord Lago?”

“I hardly think I need input on my relationship with my fiancé from  _ you _ , Master Skywalker.” Ian wrapped an arm around Padmé’s waist, and the Empress stiffened slightly. This wasn’t a side she had ever seen from Ian before, and she didn’t like it.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Anakin chuckled, he was confident and even if his eyes were sharp and uncaring for the man, his manner was annoyingly calm. “I was stating a fact. Padmé, we’ll see you in the morning, right, sweethearts?” He kissed the baby’s forehead and then tickled Luke’s stomach.

“Yes, in the morning,” Padmé agreed, maybe a little too quickly. She did not want to be in this position any longer than was absolutely necessary. “Ian, I’m afraid I have to get some work done, so lunch isn’t an option, but we’ll have dinner tonight. I promise. Sabé, will you stay with Anakin and the twins until I can have Dormé come with all the things they might need?”

“Of course, I will,” Sabé replied as she bounced Luke. “Someone has to teach Skywalker their routine if he’s about to spend more time with them.”

“Dinner,” Ian agreed. “We’ll make a night of it. I’ll take you to the theatre—”

“I’d much rather we stayed in.” The last thing Padmé wanted was to be in a public place when she ended their relationship. But the way Ian readily agreed and kissed her cheek eagerly made her regret it immediately.

This was a bad idea. This was a very, very bad idea, but it was happening.

* * *

“You have been awfully quiet, darling.”

_ Please don’t call me that. _ Padmé set down her fork and finally looked up across the table. “Ian, about today. About Anakin.”

“The nerve of him. To come back after all he has put you through.”

“Don’t talk about him like that. The fault was mine, not his,” she said defensively.

“He took advantage of your guilt,” Ian pointed out. “He walked out on his unborn children and his pregnant wife. I don’t know why you defend him.”

“I defend him because he’s a good person.” She took a sip of wine to steady her nerves. “You can’t imagine what my father did to him. He and I both wanted the best future possible for our children, and for him, that meant that he had to leave. To recover.”

“Please, darling, don’t tell me he has made you fall for pretty words. Actions should speak louder. What is stopping him from leaving them again?” Ian’s posture stiffened.

“His actions say that he came back, and Anakin is many things, but he is not a politician. He doesn’t have the guile to lie like that.”

“Well, we will have to find a suitable schedule for his visits,” Ian sighed. “We need to monitor the time he has with the twins, we have to be careful because I don’t trust him to stay. It could be harmful for the children.”

“Ian.” Padmé twisted her engagement ring around her finger, turning the skin red as the white Krayt pearl rotated. “He’s staying. He’s a Master of the New Jedi Order. He’ll be here in Coruscant, and  _ I  _ trust him with the twins. I’m not going to make him miss any more time with them than he already has. That’d be cruel.”

“It wasn’t your fault he missed their birth and wasn’t the first man to hold them.”

“Yes, it was,” she said, standing abruptly. “I’m not going to go into the details of my history, not in regards to my father, or Anakin, because that is far too personal, but acting like I’m some kind of blameless saint in all of this is far too charitable a gesture.” She turned the ring faster, moving it up her finger. “Ian, we…  _ I _ can’t keep doing this, not for the rest of our lives.”

“Padmé,” Ian stood up, alarmed. “Let’s not do anything stupid, darling, I know his return must have shaken you, but we can get through this. Together.”

“When we knew each other as teenagers, you asked me to marry you,” she reminded him softly. “And I told you then that I couldn’t because it would be my father’s decision. That I would marry whoever he thought was best for me and for the prosperity of our House. When you asked me again, I said yes because I thought I could be content.” She paused, taking a deep breath. “I shouldn’t have done that. Even if Anakin weren’t back, it would still be a mistake, and I refused to see it when everyone around us did because I needed to lie to myself.”

“He put these thoughts into your head,” Ian hissed. “He tricked you, didn’t he? He used his powers to control you.”

“Of course not!” she said indignantly, pulling off the ring and slamming it on the table. “Do you actually think I’m weak-minded enough that something like that would work on me?”

“It’s the only reason I can think of that explains this irrational behavior of yours!” He snapped. “We were fine until this morning. Until he returned.”

“Can you remember me ever telling you that I loved you?” she asked sharply. “You’ve said it to me plenty of times, but have I ever said it in return?”

“Well, no, but I understand you were having a complicated time. Being Empress and a new mom, I knew you needed time. We could have this time. You don’t have to do this. Not for  _ him. _ ”

“If you knew I needed time, why did you propose to me so quickly?” Padmé argued. “I’m not doing this for Anakin, Ian, I am doing this for myself. For my children. And for you. I didn’t say yes because I loved you, I didn’t even say yes because I thought maybe one day I  _ could _ love you. I said it because it was an easy solution.”

“I don’t believe you!” Ian shouted. “I proposed because I knew you would love me. That you had those feelings for me.  _ He  _ is ruining us. You are letting a man that abandoned you, broke your heart, and left you, break us apart. I would never do that to you but he… oh, he will do it over and over because he knows you will just blame yourself.”

“Then what’s your excuse for my weekly appointments?” The bitter words came out before she could stop herself. He wasn’t listening to her. She’d tried to avoid hurting him too much, but in the face of his resistance, she was running out of options. “Shall I tell you what happens in them, Ian? About the men who have spanked me, and stuffed their cocks down my throat and up my ass, and countless other depraved things that would make even a Hutt’s harem girl blush? As recently as this past week?”

Ian paled and took a step back, stuttering. “You… you are lying. You don’t even let me sleep in the same bed as you.”

“I can assure you, there was no sleeping going on at these meetings either,” Padmé said dryly.

He looked shocked as he swallowed a lump in his throat. “It’s… I accept you anyway. I… I can try to fix you.”

“I don’t need to be fixed in that way.” She gripped the table to keep herself from striking him across the face.

“I know you think like that and that men have broken you, but I promise I’ll be better than them and I’ll make you better.”

“They did it because I asked them to,” she corrected. “And I am fine, exactly as I am, Ian. But the simple reality is that you don’t fit into the world I’ve created for myself and my family. And it’s better that we end things now, rather than have you discover it ten years from now.”

Ian scowled. “Is that your final decision?”

“Go home to Naboo, Ian. Find a sweet, simple girl who can love you. You won’t get that from me.” She sat back down in her seat, taking another drink of wine. “We have nothing more to offer each other.”

“We will see about that,” he muttered, a dark look flashing on his face as he stormed off the room. Padmé pursed her lips as she watched him go. He would heal, she told herself. This was simply him processing the grief.

And the small part of her that was still very much her father’s daughter whispered that if he tried to do anything that might hurt her loved ones, her retribution would be enjoyable. For her, at least.

* * *

When Anakin had received a message that Padmé would be expecting him in the hotel, a few hours after Dormé and Sabé returned to the Palace with the twins, he didn’t give it a lot of thought. The HoloNews was already going crazy with the fact that the ‘royal engagement’ was on the rocks and that  _ he  _ had returned to the Capitol. It was natural for her to want to meet on neutral grounds.

It was only when he neared the door, that he stiffened. Whoever was in the room, was not Padmé.

The door opened and Ian stood before him, holding a blaster in one hand and a datapad in the other. “Get inside,” he ordered.

_ Fool. _ Anakin raised one eyebrow and calmly walked in. If the idiot thought a blaster would scare him or even graze him, he was more of an idiot than he initially thought. “I take it Padmé broke the news to you.”

“Whatever you did to her, undo it.” Ian’s hands shook as he set down the datapad and aimed the blaster at Anakin’s head. The screen of the datapad illuminated briefly, displaying an image of the twins, along with the time, leading Anakin to the conclusion that the pad belonged to Padmé. Well, that probably explained how Ian had found out about the hotel, and sent the message. “Undo it right now!”

"I didn't do anything," he replied calmly, crossing his arms. "Padmé and I… We are inevitable. What we've been through together, no one can imagine. We are each other's soulmates, and you were a mere distraction. A failed attempt at a boring life. What you're doing right now is stupid and trust me, I won't be the one that is going to leave this room hurt."

“You’re lying! You made her do it, I know you did, and if I have to kill you to free her from your influence, I will!” There was a click as Ian turned off the safety on the blaster. “You’re going to stop controlling her, and you’re going to stay away from her. From all of them. You don’t get to just come back after abandoning them!”

With a wave of his hand, the blaster shot from Ian's hand to smash against the wall and Anakin’s eyes briefly flashed a scary yellow. "You forgot who you are dealing with, didn't you?" He hissed. Maybe Ian didn't realize… Anakin hadn’t spent thirteen months getting rid of the Dark Side, he’d spent that time conciliating both sides of him. Which was the balance he was always meant to achieve. 

“I’m dealing with a man who abandoned his wife and unborn children,” Ian said, his voice quivering despite his attempts to keep looking threatening. With no weapon in his hands, he looked ridiculous. “It doesn’t matter what lies you made her believe, you don’t deserve her.”

"We don't deserve each other and that's why we are meant to be." Anakin tilted his head. "I've grown tired of you. I could use my lightsaber. Run you through with it. Separate your limbs from your body. However, that will be so complicated to explain," he muttered.

“Y-you wouldn’t. Padmé would never forgive you.” 

"You don't know her. You don't know the lengths either of us will go through to keep our family safe," his smile was cold and calculating.

“And how does making her into some kind of demented sex slave factor into your  _ family?” _ Ian accused. “You’re insane, Skywalker.” 

"Oh, that was  _ all  _ her. I just learned to enjoy it," he raised his hand, his fist half-closed as Ian found himself a few feet above the ground, clutching his throat. The Nubian man looked horrified as he realized the implications. "You should have left, Lord Lago."

“You can’t.” His voice had weakened to a pathetic plea, barely audible. “Please. I love her.”

"I love her more. Don't worry. I'll make it look like you couldn't bear the thought of losing her. After all, what man would?" He squeezed harder, watching the life disappear from his eyes until he went limp. Opening his hand he let Ian's lifeless body fall to the ground. "Pathetic moron." The Dark Side simmered for a moment, reveling in the act he’d just committed, before settling back into him.

Anakin took a deep breath, his eyes returning to their normal clear blue as he acted quickly, setting the scene so that when Ian’s body was found, his death could be ruled a suicide. There would also be the matter of leaving without anyone seeing him, but that was child’s play for the Chosen One.

* * *

“Please, please, I don’t know what you want,” Padmé begged as the twins continued to fuss and squirm in the cradle.

"Do you need help?" Anakin asked, leaning against the doorway. He had been staying at the Temple while the whirlwind of Ian's ‘suicide’ died down. He knew that Padmé needed time to rightfully honor her late ex-fiancé and he didn't want to get in the way. At least, that had been Obi-Wan’s advice. 

“Please,” she begged, pushing back her sweaty hair from her face as the twins immediately began to calm down. “Sith kriffing hells, I think they just missed you.”

"I missed them too," he smiled softly approaching the cradled and leaning down to kiss each of them on their foreheads. "Hello, little ones."

“I didn’t get the chance to thank you for bringing the datapad back,” she murmured as she watched him. “And for dealing with the hotel staff. If word had gotten out about what I used to get up to as Veré Starkiller, things would be even worse right now.”

"When I heard what happened, I had to make sure he didn't do anything to hurt you," Anakin shrugged, as he tickled Leia's feet and blew a raspberry on Luke's stomach, making them break into a fit of infant giggles. 

“Anakin,” Padmé closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “Tell me honestly, did you use what my father taught you?”

Anakin stilled and stood straighter. "I will tell you the truth if that's what you like. If you really need it for us to move forward."

“I don’t want there ever to be any secrets between us,” she answered softly. “Our road ahead is already complicated enough. I don’t want mistrust to complicate it further.”

"Then the answer is simple. Which one of us would you have preferred to die that night?"

Padmé pursed her lips. “Ideally, neither, but if I had to choose,” she paused, reaching down to let Luke grab onto her finger. “I can live without him. But I worry that if anyone ever finds out what you did, the scandal could destroy everything.”

Anakin caressed Leia's curls and watched her with love as she waved her arms and kicked her legs. “People will only discover the truth if you decide to execute me.”

“So you’re putting your life in my hands.” In spite of herself, Padmé smiled a little. “You would trust me like that?”

“You needed a sign of good faith from me." He raised his eyebrows. “You trust me with your heart. I’ll trust you with my life.”

“I think I can make that deal.”

"Good. Because they both need us. Together."

“There was never any doubt in my mind about that.” She glanced down at the spot on her finger where her engagement ring had sat. “Mourning customs don’t exactly dictate how long the proper time to wait is when one’s  _ ex- _ fiancé commits suicide. I have no idea when we’ll be able to truly be together.”

"I'm not going anywhere. We have all the time in the Galaxy to be together. So we can learn who we are, together, outside  _ his  _ control. We never figured it out and now we can." Anakin said. "Before, we lived on what he expected of us. We did what he wanted to protect ourselves and each other."

“I thought about that a lot,” she admitted to him softly. “Being outside his control. It’s why I insisted that the twins have your name instead of mine when they were born, despite our divorce. Being a Palpatine feels like a stain on my soul. Knowing they’re Skywalkers helps me feel cleansed.”

Anakin hesitated and it looked like he was going to say something, but instead, he leaned forward and pressed his lips against hers. “We won’t let him stain them.” He whispered as he pulled away. “We’ll be better. We can divide their education between the Capitol and Naboo. We’ll have our friends to help us.”

“We’ll have each other.” She reached up to touch the japor snippet at her throat. “You know, in all my life, I never thought I would find myself in a moment like this.”

“Neither did I. I was so focused on  _ not  _ having children, I didn’t think what it would mean to have one. Or two, in this case. They make everything better. Easier. Don’t they?”

“The fact that you say easier makes me think you haven’t had to change their diapers yet.”

Anakin chuckled. “No, not yet.”

“Well, you’ll have plenty of chances while I’m visiting Naboo for the funeral. I’d ask you along, but it wouldn’t really be appropriate.” Padmé raised a hand, pressing it to his cheek. “When I get back, we’ll figure out their visitation schedule. I have no idea how busy the Order’s going to keep you, but they’ll have to work around it. At least until we can officially be together again.”

“I’ll stay with them here at the Palace until you return. Don’t worry,” he turned his head to kiss her palm. “Our time will come. Our real time.”

“When it does,  _ you _ have to be the one to propose this time,” she warned with a giggle.

“Well, if I have to,” he rolled his eyes with a smile.

“It’s an order from your Empress.” Her eyes sparkled with a little bit of mischief. “And your lady. Angel.”

“Just come back quickly,” he muttered, eyes darkening as he pulled her for a more passionate, aggressive kiss. She reciprocated gladly, wrapping her arms around his neck and moaning into his mouth.

“I love you,” she murmured as they separated for breath.

“I love you too.”

Her hands curled into his hair as she pressed their foreheads together. “Take care of the twins while I’m gone. And my heart.”

“Always, love. Always.”


	13. Born Anew

“Leia, no, put it down, that still needs to go in the oven!” Padmé chased the bowl of cake batter as it floated towards her daughter. Leia simply smiled widely at her mother and continued to use the Force with a single outstretched hand. “ _ ANAKIN _ !”

“What? What now?” Anakin appeared in the kitchen, balancing Luke on his hip and sighed as he watched the scene. Raising his hand, he lowered the bowl of cake batter down, in the counter next to Padmé and Leia pouted at him from her high chair. “No is no, baby girl,” he tutted. 

“Dada,” she whimpered, her lip trembling. Anakin made a chocolate chip cookie float to her hand and she squealed, grabbing it and chewing on it, the cake batter now forgotten.

Padmé rolled her eyes as she poured the batter into the waiting pan. “You spoil her.”

“I do,” he said smugly as he kissed Luke’s cheek.

“Luke, you’re going to be Emperor now,” Padmé informed her son as she slid the pan into the oven. “Daddy’s making it impossible for your sister to do the job.”

“Mama no,” Luke said sweetly.

“We still have a long time to discuss that,” Anakin chuckled. “Ahsoka and Obi-Wan are arriving. Any news on your sister and the girls?”

“Pooja’s in one of her moods, they’ll be a little late.”

“Ah, I see,” he nodded. “Well, I’m going to help Rex and the guys finish the decorating outside,” he set Luke in the highchair near his sister and also gave him a cookie. “Unless you need my help here?”

“Threepio can watch the oven, and Artoo can handle the kids. I need to change.” She gestured at her batter-stained apron and dress. “Can’t greet guests looking like this.”

He chuckled and kissed her as she passed by him. “You look beautiful anyway. I never imagined I would see the day where Padmé Palpatine would stand in front of me covered in birthday cake batter, hair all out of place.”

“Padmé  _ Amidala _ ,” she reminded him. She’d adopted the name of the legendary Naboo Queen at the second anniversary of her coronation, after they were sure they’d weeded out the last of her father’s supporters.

“I know Padmé Amidala would, but not Padmé Palpatine,” he explained softly.

“Padmé Palpatine died a long time ago,” she replied, wrapping her arms around his waist and pressing their bodies together. “Some upstart Jedi Knight killed her with kindness and kisses and a sexy, sexy body.”

“Oh wow, maybe he should be arrested for the crime,” he teased, placing feather-light kisses over her face. “I am happy Padmé Amidala found a Jedi  _ Master  _ to be with,” he chuckled. “They are much more reliable.”

“So I’ve heard from Satine Kryze,” she giggled as his kisses tickled her skin. “Ani, I really do have to go change.”

“You two can talk all about Jedi Masters when they arrive,” he snorted as he let her go. “I’ll take the twins outside. I can have Artoo and Echo watch over them,”

“Thank you.” She kissed his cheek as she headed upstairs and started the fresher in her bedroom. It wasn’t a very long shower, just enough to get the cake off her face and out of her hair. Once she felt suitably clean, she pulled an off-white dress with silver and blue beading from her wardrobe and headed downstairs, pulling it on as she went. “Ani, can you get the back of my dress?” she called, trying to reach the buttons herself.

Entering the foyer from the veranda, he reached out and did the buttons. “This is not what I want to do to your clothes. I prefer to take them off. Also, our guests have arrived.”

“You can take them off later,” she whispered, holding her hair out of the way so he could get the last few. “And I’ll greet them in a minute. But first, I want to do this.” She spun in his arms and kissed the tip of his nose. “Ready, Angel?”

“Ready, love,” he answered with a beaming smile. She slipped her arm into his as they headed out the veranda, where Obi-Wan was escorting a heavily pregnant Duchess of Mandalore up the stairs.

“Satine, you’re glowing,” Padmé gushed, moving to embrace her friend.

“Oh, shush, we both know I look like a shaak and this child is not giving me any rest right now,” Satine complained as she returned the hug. “You, however, look positively beautiful, my friend.”

“Thank you, but I really do mean it. You look wonderful. And count yourself lucky it’s only the one baby. When I was at this point with the twins, I had to have a hoverchair moving me around.”

“I hope I don’t get to that point,” Satine sighed.

“Master, you look well,” Anakin teased, patting Obi-Wan’s back. “Marriage suits you.”

“You look entirely too smug,” Obi-Wan replied. “My wedding was months ago, I would have thought we were past this by now.”

“Oh, no, we’re never going to stop gloating,” Ahsoka promised as she hopped onto the balcony railing. Padmé covered her mouth, suppressing the urge to blurt out that she and Anakin had made love in that spot and recently.

“Yes, we find this too amusing. But Ahsoka and I had our suspicions, from the moment you wrote the New Code,” Anakin snickered.

“And now that we’ve got that out of the way, where are the birthday Skybabies?”

“With Echo and Fives, you can go and get them,” Anakin chuckled.

“Oh, you know I will.” Ahsoka hurried off, and Padmé laughed, leaning her head against Anakin’s shoulder.

“So, is Anakin going to be teaching your child, since you and Ahsoka seem determined to claim the twins?” she asked lightly.

“Of course I will,” Anakin replied quickly. “It’s only fair my next Padawan is a Kenobi.”

“Do not forget my son is set to be the next Duke of Mandalore,” Satine placed her hands on her stomach.

“So? Our daughter is going to be Empress, but Ahsoka will still have to train her before that happens,” Anakin smirked.

“Leia is not guaranteed to be Empress, I still want to make sure she has the temperament for it,” Padmé pointed out. “Luke might end up taking the crown, he’s generally the more reasonable one.”

“From what experience I have with younglings, reasonable is a very loose term,” Obi-Wan said dryly.

“No one’s actually disputing that, Obi-Wan. I need to check on the cake, Threepio can be just awful in the kitchen if we leave him unsupervised too long. Shall we all head inside?”

“Yes, and I need to see if Ahsoka is not corrupting our children,” Anakin snickered.

“Going inside sounds lovely. As would something to drink,” Satine agreed.

“Follow me,” Padmé gestured to lead them into the kitchen, where the smell of warm pastry was beginning to fill the room. She pushed past Threepio, who, of course, had to be standing right where she needed to be.

“I beg your pardon, Mistress Padmé, I could have finished the task.”

“This has to be perfect, Threepio, I’m not leaving things to chance,” Padmé replied as she opened the oven and slid a knife into the top of the cake. It came out clean. “Perfect.” She moved aside to grab some protection for her hands, only to see the cake floating up, out of the oven and its pan, and onto the waiting tray. 

“Thought I’d save you the trouble,” Ahsoka quipped as she arrived with Leia in her arms. Anakin stood next to her, holding Luke. Obi-Wan shook his head as Padmé laughed and started frosting the cake. 

“It was bad enough when it was just you who was using the Force so irreverently, Anakin, but now you’ve gone and made it fashionable,” the red-haired Jedi sighed. “Are you pleased with yourself?”

"Very," his former Padawan quipped. "I am proud of my legacy."

"Force forbid you two have more children to wreak havoc on the Galaxy," Obi-Wan sighed.

Anakin stuttered as he stared between his Master and the mother of his children. "Well, you'll have to train this one first," he muttered, blushing awkwardly. Padmé deliberately didn’t say anything, just focused on the task in front of her. 

“Padmé? Anakin? We’re here!” Sola’s voice came from the veranda and Anakin was relieved by the distraction. Ahsoka shook her head and muttered something in Leia's ear, making the baby giggle. 

“In the kitchen!” Padmé called.

Before her sister appeared, two young girls burst through the door and ran straight to their cousins. "Happy birthday!" They chorused, jumping around excitedly. 

“Girls, careful,” Sola scolded as she made it inside, arms heavy with gifts. “Hi, everyone, sorry we’re late.”

"Hi, Sola," Anakin chuckled as Pooja tugged on his arm so she could see Luke. 

"I wanna give him a birthday kiss, Uncle Ani."

He bent down to her height and she beamed, pressing a sloppy kiss on Luke's cheek and he looked at her with wide eyes before grabbing at her hair with his chubby fists. 

“Luke, no,” Padmé chided.

"Son, let go of your cousin," Anakin snorted as he stood, making Luke whimper as Pooja ran back to her mother to fix her braids. "Sorry, Pooja, he can't see anyone's long hair. He's curious."

“Threepio, will you please get the candles for the cake?” Padmé requested as she put the knife down. “And then get the twins’ high chairs?”

"Come on, we're celebrating outside," Anakin smiled. "We'll get to see the sunset too."

“That sounds beautiful,” Satine agreed with a smile. “Can we help?”

“Oh, goodness, no, you’re our guests!” Threepio fussed. “It would be most improper!”

"And you are pregnant, Satine, you're already doing enough," Anakin said as he led them all outside where the table had been set. 

Padmé carried out the cake, now with two lit candles, and placed it in front of the twins’ high chairs as everyone gathered around. The twins, having been set down themselves, immediately grabbed at the dessert, and their mother caught their hands. “Before they demolish this, I want to thank all of you, both for being here, and for being part of our family. Force knows none of us planned to see ourselves in such a position, yet here we all stand.”

"It wasn't a perfect path here but we are both very proud of our family, and we are happy that you are all here to help us celebrate it." Anakin smiled. "May we all be here for every birthday down the road."

There was a murmur of agreement and Padmé bent towards the twins. “Okay, babies, blow out the candles for Mamma, you can do it.” She demonstrated an exaggerated exhale with puffed up cheeks. “Come on.” The twins looked at her like she was crazy. “Ani, a little help?”

Chuckling he bent down to tickle their stomachs. "You're one, little ones, it's time to celebrate it," he beamed and winked at them. 

Luke blew a raspberry and the flame danced but didn't die and he giggled making everyone chuckle. Leia puffed her cheeks and blew a breath, making the flames dance again. They both giggled madly and everyone laughed as they tried to put out their candles. 

"I think Mommy and Daddy need to help," Ahsoka teased. 

“Be my guest,” Padmé huffed, throwing up her hands in defeat.

Anakin shook his head and blew out both of the candles and clapped, the twins following his lead clumsily but with toothless grins. 

"Happy birthday, you two," he kissed the top of their heads. Leia responded by grabbing a handful of the cake and mashing it directly in his face, causing everyone to laugh. "Yeah… that sums up parenthood," he sighed, cleaning the cake from his face.

“Delightful,” Satine chuckled, taking a long sip from the glass of shuura juice Threepio had brought her. “Hopefully, our son has a little more dignity, Obi.”

“Don’t count on it,” Padmé laughed as she cut a small piece to put in front of Luke, who at least had the decency to smear the dessert on his own face, rather than someone else’s.

“I want a corner piece!” Ryoo shouted.

“Me too!” Pooja agreed. “Please, Auntie?”

“Careful on the size of those pieces, they are already electric enough,” Sola shook her head with a smile.

“So let them run around the house for a little while and they’ll tire themselves out, what’s the big deal?” Ahsoka asked as Padmé passed the knife over to Threepio for serving.

“Oh, that will not be enough,” Sola snorted. 

“Maybe it  _ is _ time that we got her a Padawan,” Obi-Wan mused, looking at Anakin with a chuckle. “See how quickly she changes her tune.”

“That’s for sure,” Anakin replied as he cleaned the rest of the cake with a clean towel Threepio had gotten from him. “We’ll see which of the younglings is ready when we return. She needs to be a wise Master when Leia gets to her, otherwise… I don’t know who will boss who around.”

“If you keep talking business, neither of you gets any cake,” scolded Padmé. “Do you see me bringing up the latest tax laws?”

“I’m sorry,” Anakin pouted, wrapping an arm around her waist. “Force of habit, my love,” he kissed her temple.

“Ugh, you’re lucky you’re cute,” she huffed, passing him a plate. “You’ll make it up to me later.”

“Yes, my lady,” he whispered. taking the plate with a wicked grin and sitting down next to Ahsoka, who rolled her eyes.

“You two are disgusting. I hope I never look at someone that sappy.”

“Really? How’s Sabine?” He quirked one eyebrow as he took a bite of his cake, looking smug.

“Just my friend.”

“Of course, then why are you blushing?”

“This is my natural face color!”

“We’ll talk in a few months,” he snorted, before looking at Padmé, happily chatting with Sola while eating the birthday cake she had worked all afternoon on. “Two years ago, this was the most preposterous thing that could happen, wasn’t it?”

“A little bit, yeah,” Ahsoka admitted. “Although, two years ago, you  _ did  _ talk about rescuing her. Before we met her.”

“When we  _ did  _ meet her, I wanted to kill her and now,” he leaned in so only Ahsoka could hear. “I’m going to marry her. Out of my own free will. Because I love her and I want more babies to drive us crazy. But she doesn’t know it yet, so I need you to babysit tonight.”

“Is the kids’ room soundproof?”

He rolled his eyes. “We’ll be at the island,” he smirked. “You won’t have to worry about loud, sex noises.”

“I hope you’re right because otherwise, the twins are going to have some pretty big memories to repress.”

“What are you two whispering about?” Padmé asked curiously.

“Ahsoka’s in love with Sabine,” Anakin quipped.

“Is that even a secret?” Obi-Wan frowned.

“ _ Just friends! _ ” Ahsoka insisted.

“They’re taking it slow,” Anakin stage-whispered. 

“Slow enough that you’ll be planning Leia’s wedding sooner than mine.”

“Oh, Ani claims Leia’s never getting married.”

“Exactly!”

Anakin shrugged. “Over my dead body.”

“She’s your daughter, Anakin, if she wants to get married one day, she’ll be getting married, whether we like it or not,” Padmé teased, kissing his cheek. “But that’s many birthdays off, let’s just enjoy this one right now.”

“Please,” he smiled.

* * *

“You still have cake in your hair,” Anakin laughed as he took the piece of frosting from her curls. “Obi-Wan and Satine just went to bed. Sola and the girls returned home and Ahsoka is on twins duty.”

“I haven’t had time to shower,” Padmé giggled. “Between the party and everyone being here, it’s been hectic. I’m exhausted.”

“Exhausted? Does that mean I can’t snatch you away for a moment on the island? Because we have been living a pretty hectic life with two small babies, a Galaxy to rule and other little tasks that come up.” He kissed her cheek. “I miss you.”

“I miss you too,” she admitted, tracing her fingers along his face. “Alright, we can go to the island.”

“Good, come on,” he beamed, taking her hand. She followed him down to the docks, he could feel her curiosity rising in the Force.

“You’re planning something, aren’t you?” she asked. “How long?”

“What I’m planning is gazing at the stars with my girlfriend without one of our babies crying out and interrupting our couple time,” Anakin shrugged as he helped her into the small boat. “Or do you prefer we just go to bed?”

“Of course not, but I know that look in your eyes, Anakin Skywalker. You’re being sneaky.”

“A man can’t plan a moonlight picnic without getting quizzed? Force, Padmé, I’m going to stop being romantic.”

“I’m sorry,” she said earnestly. “I’ve just had quite a bit to think about today. At one point tonight, Sola said to me, ‘I knew he could save you,’ and it’s been sticking with me.”

“I was pretty rough to Sola, the first time we met, but I honestly don’t think I did what she thinks. We saved each other,” Anakin moved the boat with the Force, smiling up at Padmé. 

“I think you’re right,” she agreed. “That entire day was something of a nightmare, wasn’t it? Palpatine hanging over us, you drunk out of your mind, me being a selfish, spoiled little monster.”

“The whole day was a nightmare, yeah, but if I am being honest, I don’t remember much of it. Bits and pieces. The alcohol helped but,” he shivered, “I never drank or will drink like that again. The hangover was the worst migraine I ever had.”

“It’s not worth remembering. I’d  _ love _ to forget it if I could.” She trailed her fingers in the water.

“The thing I remember clearly is your monster of a dress that swallowed you,” he snorted a laugh.

“It was a gaudy thing,” she agreed. “After you left, I had all the gems stripped off, and donated them to charities across the galaxy. And I burned what was left.”

“Do you realize we grew to the opposite sides of each other?” He tilted his head as the boat reached the white sand beach of the island. “You became a better person. A good person. I went the other way. I was a good person and I just became more and more twisted, until I abandoned my pregnant wife.”

“It was the right choice to make for your health and our safety,” she reassured him. “And you know how much I regret putting you on the path to ever go to such a dark place. But you came back from it. You’re one of the strongest men I know, I couldn’t ask for a better father for my children, or a better person to love.”

“We met in the middle, you could say,” he helped her out of the boat. “That story needs to be put behind us. For good.”

“We’re in agreement there,” she nodded, reaching down to pull off her shoes and put her bare feet in the sand, smiling at him impishly.

“Yeah, yeah,” he huffed and tugged her towards the edge of the beach, where the sand started to disappear and fresh grass covered the ground. “I asked Rex to prepare this while we were at the party,” he beamed as they reached a blue blanket with a basket and a few pillows. 

“You owe him a raise,” Padmé laughed as she settled against the pillows, gazing up at the stars.

“That I do,” he agreed, sitting by her side. 

“Ani, can I be honest with you about something?”

“Anything, you know that,” he took her hand and kissed her knuckles.

“What Obi-Wan said at the party, about if we, I mean, you ever had more children. As soon as he said it, I kept picturing it. A little girl, maybe, with your hair and my eyes, and the chance for us to actually enjoy the pregnancy together.”

He hummed and leaned back in the pillows, looking at the dark night with the bright stars. “Yes, I can picture it,” he said quietly, with a smile. “I do regret missing the twins’ pregnancy. I think about it all the time.”

“They’ll never blame you for it.” She took his hand and kissed the palm. “When they’re old enough to understand, we’ll tell them the truth. We’ll never keep secrets from them, or use them.

“Agreed,” he smiled. “You know what I’ve been thinking?” He chuckled. “Which is curious because you brought it up five minutes ago.”

“Did I?” she asked distractedly.

“That nightmare of a wedding.”

“Oh, yes, that.” She cuddled closer to him, tucking her head into his shoulder. “What about it?”

“I’ve been thinking if you would like a do-over,” he smiled, brushing his lips against her forehead. She sat up, eyes wide.

“Ani, are you saying...”

From underneath the pillows, he took a black velvet box and opened it. “I want to marry you,” he stared down at the classic white gold band with a beautiful oval sapphire flanked by two small diamonds. “I love you. I want to marry you because I love you and I want to live that day with this strong feeling instead of a pretty different, much darker one,” he chuckled.

“Then I think you already know my answer,” she reached out to take the ring, kissing him as she did so. “I want to marry you too.”

“That’s a relief, I thought you just want to use me to have cute babies,” he teased, wrapping his arms around her waist and kissing her.

“The babies are an added bonus, but not the main attraction.” He laughed, and she nipped at his neck playfully. “There’s also the matter of you being wonderful in bed. Wonderful in general, actually. Kind, clever, brave, beautiful. My Angel.”

“My ego is very pleased right now,” he chuckled. “I love you, beautiful.”

“Is that all?” She looked up at him with a trembling lip that was clearly exaggerated.

“I love you and your beautiful soul. You are such a wonderful mother, the best one. You are fierce and protective and you love them to death. You became the woman I always knew lived buried inside of that  _ brat _ . You are a fair ruler. You have brought peace to this Galaxy. I am so proud of you. So, so proud.”

She hummed, resuming her ministrations to his neck as her fingers played with the edge of his shirt. Her hips rubbed against his leg, and one hand slipped beneath his pants to brush against his cock.

“Trying to be romantic here and your mind goes to one place only,” he teased, lips nipping at her exposed neck. “You’re impossible.”

“Is sex not romantic?” she retorted. “Maybe you giving me compliments turns me on. Or maybe it’s just that you’re irresistible, and I’m helpless against your charms.”

“Liar, you just want those babies,” he snickered, hands underneath her skirts, caressing her thighs.

“Then tell me to stop,” she challenged, squeezing his shaft. “Unless I’m right, and you want me just as much as I want you right now, my love.”

“Hey, hey, hey, I never said I didn’t want you,” he said, bucking his hips to meet her hand, moaning at the sensation. “You know I’ve always wanted you. Even when I hated you, I wanted you.”

“Oh, so you lied to me when you told me during our honeymoon that you didn’t hate me.” The hand inside his pants pinched the skin of his thigh. “Naughty boy.”

He hissed. “Yeah, what are you going to do about it?”

“I’m considering,” she paused dramatically. “I could withhold sex until the wedding. But that’d be punishing me as well.”

“You withhold sex, and I’ll sleep in a different  _ wing, _ ” he threatened. “No sex, no cuddles.”

She huffed, pulling away from him, and sat back on her elbows, considering. “If we were back in the villa right now, I’d say your punishment would be trying something new. But tonight’s been going so well, I don’t want to spoil it. So,” she paused. “You’ll have to move all of this onto the beach. We’re making love there.”

“I’d rather go back to the villa and try something new  _ but  _ we do have guests and I don’t know if they would enjoy being woken up by our kinkiness,” he pointed out. “I really don’t want to have sex on the sand, love, please?”

“You’ll have to do better than that if you want to persuade me, Angel,” she said, smiling at him impishly. “You know how these games work.”

“I just proposed to you. Don’t I deserve some love right now?” He pouted.

“Beg me for it.”

“Please, my lady, please.”

“Please what, Angel?” she prompted, tugging his shirt open so that she could see the full expanse of his broad, muscular chest.

“Please, let me worship your body and let me give you multiple orgasms,” his eyes darkened as to add deepness to his request. “Please, put your mouth on me and make me orgasm because only you know how to.”

“Hmmm.” She dropped a kiss between his navel and his groin, her teeth scraping the skin as he pulled his pants down. “And why should I do this?”

“Because you love me and I give you beautiful children in return,” he moaned, relaxing back against the pillows.

“Tell me you love me,” she whispered, her lips brushing against the base of his member. “And then maybe I’ll suck your cock.”

Anakin let out a whimper as his hand found her hair. “I love you,” he breathed as his cock hardened with the promise. “I love you, I love you, I love you.” Her tongue dragged along the swollen length and then she took him easily into her mouth as her hands gripped his backside.

_ Fuck it like it’s my cunt, _ he heard her think. Hands in her hair, he didn’t hesitate to thrust into her mouth, moaning as he did so and only stopping when he felt his tip hit the back of her throat, he pulled out to repeat the same movement, over and over until he felt himself on the edge of that climax. “Fuck,  _ Padmé, _ ” he grunted as he spilled inside her mouth.

“Yes, love?” she pulled back, wiping the last bits of his cum from her lips with a grin.

“You’re amazing.”

“As are you, my once and future husband.” She crawled on top of him, claiming his lips with a hard, passionate kiss. He reciprocated just as fiercely, tasting himself on her lips. “Dress,” she mumbled as she continued kissing him. “Get it off me.”

His hands gripped the material at her back and ripped it open, pushing the fabric down her body, setting her breasts free. Breaking the kiss, he took one of her nipples into his mouth and sucked, moaning as his other hand caressed her breast and his hips bucked up to meet hers, grinding his half-hard cock against her core. Padmé braced her hands on either side of him as she lifted her waist up, trying to give him the access he needed to properly tear away her underwear. His hands didn’t move, but she did feel her underwear slipping down her legs before tearing. Anakin raised his head, smirking, and pecked her on the lips.

“Give it to me,” she groaned against his kiss as she rubbed her exposed sex against his. “Need you inside.”

“So needy,” he teased, pulling at her bottom lip with his teeth.

“So help me, Angel, if you don’t put your cock in me right now,” she growled, her eyes dark with lust, “I will take you home and put mine in you.”

He stilled and gave her an odd look, tilting his head to the side, watching the dominant look on her face that only made him harder. “Is that the new thing you are talking about? Because,” he thought for a moment, “it actually sounds hot.”

“Well then,” she raised her hips and impaled herself on him in a single, effortlessly graceful movement. “Show me exactly how you want me to do it, and maybe I’ll grant your wish.”

Anakin groaned as he held her hips in place. “Fuck, you drive me crazy, you know that?” He breathed as he pulled out before thrusting into her completely, at a deeper angle. “ _ Fuck, _ ” he whispered to himself as he began pounding into her, raising his speed and strength as he did so. She rode him to her climax in a wordless, unending groan of pleasure, biting down hard on the spot above his heart as her orgasm peaked. 

“Just like that, then?” she asked sweetly, licking her lips as she looked him over.

Feeling spent from his own climax, he nodded. “Yeah, that would be nice,” he whispered, breathing ragged. She brushed the sweaty curls back from his forehead.

“Do you need a moment to recover before we go back?”

“I’m good,” he kissed her palm.

“Good.” she rolled off him and examined what remained of their clothes. “My goodness, we might have to go back completely naked.”

“You can wear my cloak,” he chuckled.

“And what do you plan to wear, my love?” she teased, retrieving the black garment from the ground and wrapping it around her shoulders.

“Thankfully, you didn’t rip it too much. It covers the essentials not to scare our troops and guests,” he snorted as he composed himself as best as he could.

“It’ll have to do,” she sighed, examining the remains of their moonlight picnic. “We’ll send someone to clean the rest of this up in the morning. Right now, I’m taking you home and fucking you.”

“I am a toy to you,” he smirked.

“You are  _ everything _ to me,” she corrected, extending her hands so she could pull him to his feet.

“That was incredibly sweet,” he jumped to his feet, accepting her hands and leaning down to give her a romantic kiss. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” For a moment, she leaned against him, just lingering in his embrace and the sheer warmth, beauty, and light that he had always possessed.

She hadn’t deserved him when they met. There were times when she still wasn’t sure if she deserved him now. But, by some miracle, he was hers, and she would never stop being grateful for that.


End file.
